My fella is a snorer, and just recently, with some weight gain (which he’s attempting to combat) his snoring has tripled in intensity.
I am a light sleeper. The slightest noise wakes me, but I have learnt to live with his snoring until recently.
I am not asking for medical advice, but ways that any of you have found a solution where you are both comfortable (ie. the old roll 'im on his side advice - which doesn’t work for us). He is going to see his Dr in the next few weeks, but let’s be honest, it will be weeks and months, rather than days.
We live in a small unit where there is no where else other than the bedroom to sleep, other than the cars downstairs. I just need some sage and sane (ish!) advice on how to get through the next few weeks.
I live with a snorer, and I am also a light sleeper. I realized I was waking up both exhausted and angry with him due to the snoring.
When I broached the subject, his first suggestion really bothered me–he wanted me to wear ear plugs. While I know that works for many people, I flat cannot do it. I was molested as a very small girl and the thought of being that out of touch with my environment is completely inconceivable. I just cannot do it. That might be an option for you, but it sure wasn’t for me.
I also noticed a dramatic increase in the snoring as my husband gained weight. That was a VERY hard thing for me to say to him, because I was really afraid of offending him or hurting his feelings.
So he started counting his calories (which he needed to do anyway), he became more consistent about taking his allergy meds and he started taking Sudafed if he knew he was particularly phlegmy. The other thing we did was set up a semi noisy fan that acts as a white noise generator and helps at least even out the sound of the snores.
This is not a perfect solution. He really doesn’t like how Sudafed makes him feel, and I still end up elbowing him pretty frequently. But it’s not as bad as it was, and I would still rather sleep with the noisy him than not.
I had a thread about this a while ago and somebody offered me a nuclear option - okay, so he’s really, really asleep, right? And you just CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE?
Pinch his nose shut until his brain goes into “panic mode” and resets him into a lighter sleep (hopefully not waking him up and freaking him out). It will take him a little bit to get back to the snoring stage which may give you time to get to sleep. It works, but don’t tell him you’re doing it because he’ll be hurt and sad.
Also, earplugs. I thought I couldn’t sleep with them - well, if the snoring is bad enough, by the time you put them in you’ll see them as a blessing.
He tried the strips for me - didn’t work for him, might work for you.
When my husband has had a cold for two weeks and the baby is teething and waking up twice a night and the cats are attacking my toes under the covers and I just can’t take the snoring anymore . . . I go sleep on the couch. Yes, it sucks. It’s not fair. It makes me crabby. But at least I get a *little * sleep.
Some couples keep a guest bed for times like these. Some have made it a permanent solution, opting to maintain seperate beds to maintain the peace.
I wish you luck.
I’ve been sleeping with earplugs for years, and recently converted my boyfriend to them as well. We’re both snorers, but I guess I’m louder than he is. I also try not to sleep on my back - not too hard for me, since I don’t move around a lot in my sleep. YMMV. One last thing, from my boyfriend: he says he sleeps better if he gets to sleep before I do. It might help if you went to bed half an hour before your fella.
I (usually) only snore after I’ve been drinking. I work 4-10hr days and have fri’s off. My wife hates it if I go out and have a couple of drinks on a Thurs night. No matter how quiet I am, she always wakes up when I get into bed. So she’s awake and I immediatley am able to go to sleep - and apparently snore.
I rarley snore if I go to bed sober, but if I have even a few drinks I tend to. I don’t know if your fella’s a drinker or not, but that could be the issue.
They don’t completely eliminate the snoring but might bring it down a decibel or two.
Problem?
It tends to dry out the nasal passages and throat of the wearer but there are plenty of testimonials of satisfied customers from both snorers and long suffering bedmates.
Well my main solution is roll him over like a rug but you’ve already said that doesn’t work for you. What I also do is arrange 2 pillows flat on the bed, not propped up, and the top one is this extra-firm one. As always, YMMV.
A word of warning: This technique once nearly got Mrs. Eleison punched in the face. Your spouse may react instinctively and violently if he wakes to the sensation of someone smothering him.
I’m the snorer in our marriage. I let my wife get at least a 30-minute head start on me in the bed. Sometimes this works; sometimes one of us winds up switching to the spare bed.
I am a bit of a snorer due to both weight and crappy sinuses. I find sleeping with a V-shaped pillow that keeps my head propped up a bit really reduces my snoring, perhaps your fella would be willing to give one a try?
My parents were both world-class snorers. Family hotel rooms were sheer torture. A number of years ago, both were diagnosed with sleep apnea and their doctors prescribed CPAP machines. Apparently it’s not just a relationship issue–it can have serious health consequences if not addressed.
My husband may be heading down that road himself, although he keeps it somewhat in check by keeping his weight down. I find that he basically doesn’t snore if he is not on his back, so I gently ask him to turn over when he gets going with the buzzsaw.
I have sleep around the same time my SO does, otherwise it’s Couch City for me. He snores inconsistently, sometimes loudly, sometimes softly, sometimes loudly then softly, so it’s impossible for me to learn to filter it out.
I could sew tennis balls to his boxers or spend many nights testing out earplugs or figure out where is the best spot to elbow him to make him stop, but it’s far easier to just get up and sleep in the living room. I only mind if I’m really tired and really want to sleep in my bed.
Take a look at Chinups here I don’t snore much, but wake up with a very dry mouth from due to mouth breathing at night. These things helped me, and supposedly stop snoring too.
threnodyangelfire, is it the poking him to get him to roll over that doesn’t work, or does he snore while on his side?
mr emilyforce is an occasional snorer. Our white noise macine covers most of it.
If he’s really snorking, if I do so much as lay my hand on his arm he rolls onto his side without waking up. I didn’t even have to train him! – he hates the idea that he’s keeping me awake and does it all himself. Which helps you not at all; sorry.
When camping or in hotels with the whole family when I was a kid, Dad was a terrible snorer. I often got him to stop by clapping my hands loud once. Twice and everyone wakes up and asks you what the hell you’re doing.
With apologies to Contrary, who clearly knows they’re not an option for her, I’ll third for earplugs, threnodyangelfire, if you haven’t tried them already. When we lived in a very noisy urban duplex, I tried four or five different kinds before finding the ones I used every night. If you’ve tried foam and not liked them, you might try the silicone clay ones or the non-disposable fancy plastic ones that come in different sizes. Many places online sell them – dedicated earplug stores like I’ve linked to above, but also industrial supply places. Many offer inexpensive samples or trial assortments.
