I’m not talking about overnight in jail. I’m talking prison… lets say any incarceration longer than six months. What did you do? (I’m sure this will make for an interesting thread) 
I want to add a question:
Are the stories of dropping the soap real? I mean, is it that slippery?
(Seriously… is there that much butt rape going on?)
Qadgop the Mercotan has spent an awful lot of time in prison in the last couple years. Probably adds up to more than six months total.
But they call him “doctor” and let him out every night, so I don’t think it counts. 
In 1983, when I was 18, I got arrested for burglery. Some friends of mine came to my house and got me out of bed to go driving around. One of them had a relative they were pissed off at, and they had the bright idea of burglerizing their house while they were at work.
Like a dumbass, I went along with it, and of course, we got caught about fifteen minutes later. I was 18, so I went straight to the city jail, while my friends, being 17, went home with their parents.
Anyway, to make a long story short, I got probation, but I got arrested for underage drinking and had to do four months in the county jail.
No, there wasn’t any buttrape going on in the Blair County Jail. I was scared shitless when they took me in, but I soon found out that I knew probably half the people in there (See, in Altoona, damn near everyone has been to jail at least once…thats just the kind of town this is). I pretty much read all day and became a master spades player during my time in the pokey.
The thing that really sucks is, while I had the least amount to do with the burglery, I was the one that got stuck with a felony the rest of my life. My buddies all went to juvenile court and all their records got erased.
Oh well, thats life in a small white trash city.
I have a very close friend that’s been in prison for 4 years for selling drugs. He’s getting out in a few weeks. While he’s been in, he has read a lot, exercised enough to beat back his diabetes completely, taken computer classes, and gotten his commercial driver’s license.
According to him, the rape thing is not something that actually happens anymore. There are enough guys in there willing to be someone’s girlfriend, no need to force anyone. Of course, being 6’5 and 250 lbs, nobody’s really messed with him for any reason.
It’s going to be difficult for him- you basically have to learn how to live on the outside all over again, but I’m looking forward to him getting out and spending time with him.
Yep, my advice to those contemplating a life of crime: do it underage.
3.5 years juvenile and halfway houses and such.
I did two months at the Franklin County Hotel, in '88, for my second DUI. I know, I was young and stupid, I’ve learned since then, I’m scum, yada yada… There was no butt-play… in play. Basically a large work-release facility. I don’t know about REAL prison tho…
Convicted of sales and possesion of LSD in 1973. I was in the Army. I was not a dealer. I sold to a friend of a friend who happened to be a CID agent.
Sentence…6 months confinement at Ft. Leavenworth, bust to E-1, total forfeiture of pay and allowances and a BCD.
I went to Leavenworth and did my time as my case was going to the Court of military appeals.
I earned enough good time at Leavenworth to get out in 4 1/2 months. I went home.
Waited.
The appeals court ruled.
My discharge was throw out, I was allowed to return to the Army. My time was upheld. Hell, I had already done it. The fine was cut in half, they gave me half of my money back. The bust to E-1 was upheld.
So I went on to get my honorable discharge.
Convicted of sales and possesion of LSD in 1973. I was in the Army. I was not a dealer. I sold to a friend of a friend who happened to be a CID agent.
Sentence…6 months confinement at Ft. Leavenworth, bust to E-1, total forfeiture of pay and allowances and a BCD.
I went to Leavenworth and did my time as my case was going to the Court of military appeals.
I earned enough good time at Leavenworth to get out in 4 1/2 months. I went home.
Waited.
The appeals court ruled.
My discharge was throw out, I was allowed to return to the Army. My time was upheld. Hell, I had already done it. The fine was cut in half, they gave me half of my money back. The bust to E-1 was upheld.
So I went on to get my honorable discharge.
But sometimes those acid trips repeat themselves.
Sorry, Reeder, I was just doing my job. 
Mr2U has been a guest of the Cook County Department of Corrections at 26th and State street for a couple weeks. Driving on a suspended. Or a revoked. Or something.
Missy is busy eating lunch, organizing Take Your Kids To Work Day and generally doing several things at once.
NOT 26th and State - 26th and California.
Yeesh - I ought to know - I’ve sent money there for commisary enough times…