Rules, guidelines, etc.
I’ve know about this web site for years, and always enjoyed reading Cecil’s articals and your comments in the GQ forums, so i thought I’d give you guys a try.
As for me, I’m an artist (actually I work at a grocery store) who has done some writting, so I may be looking into your Cafe Society Forum real soon.
So what advice can you give me to help me fit in.
Read the FAQ thoroughly. And try not to be scared, it’s only calamari.
The #1 rule is Don’t be a jerk.
The #2 rule is to send me love offerings of chocolate.
Most people follow rule #1. Oddly, very few follow #2.
Welcome to our sandbox! 
What? Newbie? It’s INITIATION TIME! WOOO!
:: rolls in the 55 gallon drum of canola oil and grabs the spatula off its peg ::
Sign up fee accepted at my pay-pal account.
Oh goodie! Where are the tentacle restraints? And the glitter…
Point well taken.
Tho does that calamari come with Wild Rice.
Where did the sheep get to? We have to find the sheep…
Sorry, no wild rice, Longgrain. But we have plenty of GRONK! when Hal brings his Squcks in.
Muhahahahahaha …
wheels in trebuchet
Welcome!
hands over complimentary shower cap
Are you allergic to goat? If so, you might want to take some Benadryl.
We are fairly loose around here. Don’t be a jerk, read the thread before offering your “original” thesis, and worship anybody with more than, say, 4700 posts…
Will do capt.
You can’t post here!
Off the board immediately!
OMG-someone alert the Forces–we’ve got a newbie in sector 6!!!
:eek:
welcome to the playground.
We’re all over you…like white on well-you know. 
Don’t make any loud noises once the llama has been brought in.
Obviously, silenus left out a digit: that was supposed to be 14,700 posts. (These newbies are always trying to give themselves a boost.)
No! Not the calamari! :: recalls horrific events :: Oh wait, nothing terribly horrific happened to me. I got in before they introduced the Squcks. So just mildly horrific. Hope it’s not too bad, Longgrain.
:: runs away before the Squcks come ::
But if somebody offers you a soda straw, be afraid…be very afraid…
Have fun.
Pray to Og before bedtime.
And always obey the Monstre[sup]TM[/sup]
Someone please make sure the staging area for the llamas is away from the…Great Goddess…get those walking rugs away from my TREES…
Well, isn’t that an… interesting… way of describing events. And quite accurate, from a certain twisted point of view.
You may need the bib and welders’ glasses.