Right?
When a woman says “those shoes are so sexy” she’s saying there cute, and nothing at all prurient.
And women do (usually) dress for other women?
I’m 66 and I’ll never understand women, but I’m beginning to catch on. Basically, if I don’t understand, its probably because its none of my business. 
I love women.
Women dress for other women? I’m a straight female. No wonder I’ve never given a crap about what I wear.
Women are more likely to praise other women for what they’re wearing, or how they look, then men are. That’s the ‘Women dress for other women’ thing, at LEAST as much as for the competitive angle. I don’t wear makeup much or dress nice at work <hey, I’m on my feet most of the day; I am not doing that in heels> but when I do, the women make a point to let me know it looks good. Which feels good 
If one of the GUYS said something, that’d just be…kinda creepy.
So yah…women do the sisterhood/support thing. It’s like a guy telling another guy the workouts are showing results, or…whatever it is guys do to support each other. :dubious:
As far as sexy=cute…dunno. I think it’s all the same, pretty much: “Hey, those look good!”.
I don’t think your logic is correct. If a woman is saying the shoes are sexy, she doesn’t mean they’re cute, she means they’re sexy. Why do they have to be mutually exclusive? It’s just a way of saying they’re liable to attract the opposite sex (or whatever sex is desired) in a physical way. Or maybe they make the wearer stand up straighter and seem more attractive. You know, sexy. If she says they’re cute, well that seems to me to be either a nice thing to say, or she legitimately thinks they’re cute and nothing more. Maybe they have a small bow on them and cute fits better. But IMO cute /=/ sexy and vice versa.
Yeah, but what does it really mean when a woman says to another woman that an outfit “looks cute”? It implies more than attractiveness, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it also include a certain kind of approbation that only a woman can grant to another woman? To this extent, saying something is “sexy” is a way of withholding such approbation, isn’t it?
One of my favorite attainable cars is a Honda S2000. I don’t call it “sexy”. My friend at work, a woman, does. I think she’s sexy.
That’s what I mean.
We’re both pretty typical in that regard, speaking generally.
Honda S2000 (no longer made).
Oh, now I’m totally confused about what is being asked here! mangeorge, are you saying that that you don’t find “things” sexy (like the car) but your coworker does; you find “people” sexy so you think using the term sexy for “things” is confusing…
OR…
Are you confused as to the signal one woman gives another when she categorizes a pair of shoes or an outfit as sexy…do you think the one woman is trying to tell the other that she really thinks SHE is sexy?
And do you think that your coworker is trying to say she finds YOU sexy when she says that about your car choice?
If you are just confused as to what the difference is between sexy and cute, that’s a whole ‘nother can of worms full of judgement calls and attitudes and layers of opinion. On any given day I could tell my boss her outfit is cute, or sexy, or elegant, or stylin’, or classic or unique or polished or whatever. I’m only commenting on how she and the clothes look to me, not on whether I have any interest in her. And what looks cute to me can also look sexy to her when she looks at herself.
And cute and sexy are generally positive terms, but not equal. “A bit young for you” and “skanky” would be the bad terms.
Actually, kittenblue, I’m not confused at all, and I don’t think you are either. I do think you might be making a mountain out of a molehill.
I think that your dream car might make a good analogy: someone knowledgeable about cars might say that it’s awesome because of the engineering of the left-hand doohickey or the gear ratio or the aerodynamics or such. I know little about cars, so I might admire the general effect - that it goes fast or handles well or looks pretty. By the same token, many men look at the overall effect of a woman’s grooming choices, noticing whether she looks nice or not. Most women notice the details of those choices: the shoes are sexy, or the dress is really flattering to a specific figure.
My favorite example of a surprising exception to the “men notice the effect but not the reason” rule: a couple of years ago, I popped by the office on the way to make some sales calls. I was wearing a fitted but tasteful little black dress, a white blazer, and a pair of adorable black and white polka dot shoes. The boss commented on my outfit, observing that male clients would notice that I had very nice legs while women would fall in love with my footwear. He was right, and that was exactly the effect I was after when I chose my wardrobe. (And the observation wasn’t creepy, just very matter-of-fact.)
There you go! And I enjoy that general difference between us.
I was just trying to get some clarification about what you were really asking, since the OP wasn’t especially clear to me.
Oh, I’m not really asking a question as making an observation. Lacunae Matata (thanks) put it pretty clearly.
Ewwww, guys do not tell each other that their abs are really coming along. Ok, I’m sure some do, but the context where that is ok is much narrower than a ‘cute shoes’ comment.
What baffles me is how women refer to things like cameras and backpacks as cute, 
Cute means “bowlegged”.
Pople said that when I was a kid. Not sure what it means, but it;s probably not dirty.
Depends on whom you’re parenthesising those legs around, darlin’. 
I find this thats exchange from new radio helps
Beth’s kinda mean, what with her napoleon complex and all.