There’s Rule 34, of course. According to TV Tropes, there’s Rule 36 (“There’s a fetish for everything”). What other rules our there? Where did they come from? What’s Rule 1 (aside from “Do not act incautiously when confronting little bald wrinkly smiling men!”)? How high to they go up to? What does it say about me that I spend time thinking about this?
I would say that Rule Number Two is “More than two shakes and you’re playing with it.”
Rules of the Internet. Beware, memes lurk behind every rule. It helps if you’re familiar with 4chan.
[Counting down to the first *Fight Club *reference…]
This is the complete and exact answer to the OP. You may be disappointed.
Technically there was a reference before you even posted since the first two rules of the internet (in Bosstone’s link) are:
It should be mentioned that there lists everywhere, and none of them are really consistent. The only constant ones are rules 34 and 35 (which is basically a corollary to 34) and USUALLY 1 and 2. Look at the differences just between Bosstone’s link and this list from Encyclopaedia Dramatica (it’s a stand alone gif so it’s SFW, don’t worry), it starts off similar, but the later numbers get more and more different.
There’s a phrase you don’t see that often.
Yes - the main point is it’s just a bunch of inside jokes and random junk that won’t make sense to the vast majority of internet users.
SHUT UP NEWFAG!!
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Rule 6: There is NO rule Six!
- Tugging on the capes of Kryptonians is contra-indicated.
- Spitting into the wind is foolish, and messy.
- Leave Clayton Moore alone, you bastards.
- Slim says “Do you feel lucky, Punk?”
- Never pet a burning dog.
Inspired by number 2, that and mine were both in the “tips” menu for Warcraft 2.
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Hi Opal
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All persons more than a mile high to leave the court.
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No one shall speak to the Man at the Helm (and the Man at the Helm shall speak to no one).
I dunno. These:
may seem pretty familiar to some folks around here … Also, posts 6 & 17 in this thread are people noticing that:
Rule d
Tech questions are never off-topic unless expressly banned.
(Corollary d’: Even then, they’re likely to get a response or two.)
Rule d+1
The longer any discussion continues, the less it is about the topic and the more it is about the discussants.
Rule d+2
Respect the OP, but above that, respect the hivemind. The quicker a thread goes off-topic, the less likely your on-topic post will be responded to, or regarded as anything more than noise.
Rule d+3
People with truly interesting points of view cannot express them clearly.
(Corollary (d+3)’: If they can, they’re batshit crazy.)
Rule d+4
Question the hivemind too trenchantly and you will be swarmed. Trolls are a nuisance, but questioners are a threat.
(Corollary (d+4)’: Any meeting of minds, common ground, etc., can be reached only *after *a swarming.)
Rule d+5
The longer any discussion continues, the more it evolves/devolves into a shoving match of a. legalistic reasoning or b. supposedly-empirical evidence.
Doug, those sound more like laws than rules. But, they ring ever so true.
Rule kvin: never dance in hiking boots.
The first Ferengi Rule of Acquisition is: “Once you have their money, you never, ever, give it back.”
Yes, indeed. The Rules of Acquisition are listed here.
Listen to Ivanova. Do not ignore Ivanova’s recommendations. Otherwise, Ivanova will tear your lungs out!