Well, when you hear the clop clop clop of reindeer on the rooftop…oops…never mind, wrong guy.
Snuck over the border looking for work.
We’re up to our ass in crutches and wheelchairs!
So basically all us heathens are keeping him away?
Apparently they’re both getting their data from Wikipedia. Can I hear a vote for about 4.2 billion years, which is much close to the correct answer?
Levon sent him to the finest school in town.
Are you kidding? did you SEE what they did to him last time he was here?
or the alternate one…
“hey god, why don’t you go back to visit earth?”
Are you kidding, i visited once 2000 years ago, wound up knocking up some broad, and they STILL talk about it!
Hum, that makes the Earth at about 1 billion years older than the universe. Interesting thought.
Anything is possible when you have faith.
Look, it’s simple. He canonically came back from the dead; that makes him some sort of undead. Given his coherence, apparently as a vampire and not a zombie. He’s just been in hiding in embarrassment all these years because that whole “burned by holy objects” problem is highly awkward for a religious figure. Plus, vampires can’t stand the name of God or Jesus’s own name, so the last thing he wants is people following him around chanting “Praise Jesus”.
Followers: “Praise Jesus!”
Jesus: “Ow!”
Followers: “Praise Jesus!”
Jesus: “Ow!”
Followers: “Praise Jesus!”
Jesus: “OW! Stop that, for God’sOWWWWW!!!”
I saw Jesus fight Muhammed in boxing match. Jesus won. A recent WBA champion is named Moses. Maybe he’ll get to fight Jesus or Muhammed some day.
Or don’t own a calculator.
Never. There’s too much money to be made in predicting his return, along with all those apocalypse scenarios.
“They were a great bunch of guys…they smelled a little like bait, but ah, they were a great bunch of guys.”
Stranger
I heard he had some kind of tax beef with The Man.
[knopfler] Two men say they’re Jesus; one of them must be wrong [/knopfler]
Even a broken Jesus is right twice a day.
As long as he bring pie.
Or Borg.
“WHY DO YOU RESIST? WE ONLY WISH TO IMPROVE THE HOLINESS OF ALL PEOPLE. YOU WILL ALL BECOME ONE…WITH THE LORD.” - Jesus of Borg
No, he went to Venus, leaving Levon far behind.