msmith537, I just want to thank you for keeping a level head in this thread, particularly when replying to my post and others. As a fraternity member, you could have taken offense to my post and taken shots at me personally, but I applaud you for speaking honestly about your experiences, and acknowledging good and bad about the Greek system, and how it isn’t necessarily for everyone.
I’m too old to join a sorority (in my opinion), and most of the sorority girls at my university just seem so…silly. I feel perfectly confident being silly on my own, thank you. I don’t need to have a pack for that. Our sororities and fraternities are segregated as well. One of the things I do like about the fraternities, though, are the occasionally rude t-shirts sported by the Kappa Sigs. Those boys are very entertaining, and they’re very appreciative when you tell them you like their shirts. I had a class once with four of them, all wearing the same “Beware of Greeks bearing Trojans” condom-themed t-shirt.
They all do lots of service-type stuff, and most of them seem like fairly nice people. The Greek system, in my school, mainly involves themed clothing. At least, that’s what it looks like from here.
We don’t have them here. I’ve always wondered (well, since I started university, anyway) if I was missing out. I don’t generally get on as well with other guys as I do girls, so I imagine not.
Back during my first attempt at college (early 80’s, back when the dinosaurs roamed) I probably wouldn’t have even made it through the front door. I was a naive white trash dyke, and oh-so-looked the part.
On the other hand, I was good friends with a guy who got dressed in high drag, rushed the most elite sorority on campus, and almost made it through the first party-- his hairy wrists busted him (dummy, he should’ve shaved). He became something of a folk hero among us GDIs.
I’m surprised that only two people have even mentioned price. At my college (which had the first chapter of the first fraternity. Anyone? Anyone?) dues were about $500 a year (or possibly even a semester) No way did I have that kind of extra cash, plus price of all the lettered clothes, white dresses, other crap.
It’s not like we aren’t aware that not only are we just like each other, we are just like every other fraternity house. It became a running joke in our house because we’d have five guys show up to breakfast all wearing the same Black Watch Green Plain shirt and a white cap.
I don’t know why people always assume the worst from Greeks. One of our “groupies” thanked me for not making fun of her friend who didn’t have a lot of money and didn’t dress in A&F or Ralph Lauren clothes. What are we going to do? Single some dude out and be like “what are you…POOR!? Haw Haw! Good one Brad!”
Funny thing about hazing. Our fraternity had a strict no-hazing policy which made for a really boring pledging. I felt I missed out on that part of fraternity life (not like I want to pick up golfballs with my ass or anything). Apparently so did our pledges in following years, to the point that they would provoke us to haze them by kidnapping brothers, or shooting fireworks at the house.
My response was to line them up, chastise them for about 10 minutes and then tell them that they would now face the brothers in a Beruit* tourniment. This had them talking a lot of smack until it was reveiled that we would play with beer, but they would play with “mystery cups” of whatever we found in the kitchen that wouldn’t kill them.
I think an ideal pledging program should incorporate learning Greek/fraternity history (recite the Greek alphabet NOW PLEDGE!!), respect for the house (clean that party room NOW PLEDGE!!), teamwork (drink those pitchers NOW PLEDGES!!) and it should be fun (line up for ROAD TRIP PLEDGES!!!). What you don’t want is individual assholes singling people out and going on power trips. Oh and no trips to the hospital (there shouldn’t be a need, not that we won’t let you go if you injure yourself).
The best part of pledging has to be the pledge road trip. We tell the pledges that they have a “house betterment” weekend where they will detail the fraternity house from top to bottem. We tell them they need to bring anything they need for the weekend, including sleeping clothes and to get their homework done beforehand because they won’t have time until Sunday night. Then while they clean around the house, we pull up a couple of rental vans and reveil that we’re taking them to Penn State or Rutgers or some other college within driving distance that has a chapter of our fraternity.
Most Greeks I know would think that was pretty funny as well.
*A popular a beer game involving throwing ping pong balls back in forth at cups of beer on a large table
I never rushed a sorority because the process was both very expensive and very shallow (basically a huge fashion parade combined with the cattiest imaginable episode of “what not to wear” X 1 billion). On average, the frat brothers seemed to like each other better and have more fun than the sorority chicks, who were always feuding over one bullshit thing or another. Bearing in mind that my idea of hell is having 45 sisters – and at that time in college I had virtually no female friends, though I’ve mellowed on the Evil of other women over the years.
I have no problem inherently with the Greek system – I used to go to a lot of Frat parties my freshman year where friends of mine were pledges. Ironically (because I am a huge tomboy/dork) I was much desired as a frat-party partner by other girls because I was not afraid to talk to strangers --even gasp brothers! even gasp Seniors! – using witty opening lines like “so, which do you think tastes worse, Cold Beast, or warm Beast Lite?”
I am a huge joiner – I joined the Theater department, the Equestrian Team, the Newspaper staff… I was a busy little dorklet. Long story short, I didn’t feel the need to buy the approval of other women through the sorority rush process. I could get plenty of approval – for free – from other sources.
Went to Tulane, also, and like **Shagnasty ** said, it’s not like the Greek system was your only opportunity for fun in New Orleans.
My freshman roommate did pledge, and it definitely contributed to the financial ruin that prevented her from finishing sophomore year. She and I both relied heavily on financial aid to get through, and she had no common sense and tried to keep up with her Big Sister who was an early Paris Hilton. Since my roommate was technically able to afford it, I guess technically I could have, too, but I was much more conservative about spending money, and in that respect I think I made the right choice not to push my luck.
As a girl you could definitely attend all the fraternity parties you wanted without being part of the Greek system. Some of them were very elaborate, like the Betas’ Jungle Party. I was lucky enough never to meet a really bad end at any fraternity parties.
In a way I think I could have benefited from the civilizing effect of a sorority. At the time the cultishness definitely creeped me out. I’d never been assimilated into a Borg before. What I realized as an adult is that many people seem to benefit from being assimilated into a Borg or two in their lives, whether it be a sports team, the military, a sorority, or a corporate employer.
In summary: social life = no need, cost > budget, assimilation = maybe could have been a good thing, but generally hasn’t been my thing.
Hot Damn! My roommate was a Beta and that is how I got to go to the Jungle even though outside guys weren’t commonly allowed. Most…Unbelievable…Party…Even. They took their huge, crappy, multistory house and filled the entire thing with literally tons of sand so the whole inside of the house was like a beach. I have no idea how the structure survived that much weight especially considering the shape it was in. Next they rape the swamps for those giant swamp palm-like frond plants. They collect thousands and cover every single inch of wall with them. They dug a lagoon in the back yard and had pumps running water.
Keep in mind that this party takes over a dozen people over two months to physically plan and build and they work every night.
On the night of the party, there are drugs and alcohol galore. 50 gallon garbage cans are filled with mystery substances that don’t always include the legal. The Betas sold Ecstasy as a fundraiser to make this party happen you understand. It is hedonism like you have never seen even by New Orleans standards. The members were as little jungle costume as possible and the mostly female attendees tended to lose their clothes as the night goes on too.
The coolest part is that they built this multilevel labyrinth maze under the house. You have to put knee pads to go in but it is large and pitch black. They have these little side rooms built so that people can have sex. Countless people can go in at the same time. It takes some people hours to find their way out. When you find your way to the right level and spot, they floor drops out from under you and you land on a slide that leads into the lagoon.
The part lasts for 48 hours or so IIRC. Good live bands play.
As you can see, I wasn’t completely anti-greek, I just liked to suck only the benefits out of other people and leave them with the mess. The fact that my wife was in a sorority (Theta) probably means that I was the Greek-iest non-greek out there.
Sadly, the Betas and their Jungle extravaganza are no more. My roommate was their treasurer and somehow managed to run up over $200,000 in debt, much of it in his name because of this type of thing. The chapter was closed and the house was sold. If you listen carefully on a clear night however, you can still hear the faint roar of the jungle.
We didn’t have fraternities when I got to UCSD. Then, while I was away in Germany during my junior year, a couple of RAs and other assorted friends founded SOAP, or the Student Organization for Alternative Production. It’s official purpose was to put together theme dances and other events which the regular Uni Events group was either unwilling or unable to offer, but otherwise it worked much like a fraternity. Membership was by invitation, and for the first year or so they didn’t even think about adding any new members. Not long after I started my senior year, however, they decided to have an official pledge class and I was invited to be part of it. They seemed to have great parties, so I thought why not. I had come out of my shell a bit; as a freshman I would have avoided anything resembling a party, but was enjoying them as an upperclassman.
We didn’t have hazing beyond the mildest kind imaginable. We pledges had to address the Actives as ‘Future Brother, sir!’ and carry out any reasonable directive from the brothers. It was understood that we would not be asked to do something ridiculous or degrading and we never were. Additionally we had to memorize club history (what there was of it), traditions (what there were of them), formal rules, and the recipe for Fogcutter Punch. In addition pledges did much of the grunt work at parties.
Thanks. I vaguely remember some of that 