Were you in a fraternity/sorority?
Which one?
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
What reputation did your group have on campus?
Was there any hazing?
Who did you party with?
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Ok, I’ll start.
Which one?
Alpha Delta Pi.
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
As far as positivity, yes and no. The sisters were a good group of people but I was not willing, or able, to put in a lot of time. It was also very expensive and having so many places to be at any given time got old. If I had it to do all over again, I might do it again, but I would definitely wait till my sophmore year and be prepared to put a lot of time into it.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
There were groups of girls in the sorority who I am sure are good friends even now. But as far as true sisterhood, no. I’m not sure if it’s possible in a group of 100 girls or so.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
Heh. We used to say that guys wanted to date the Tri Sigs and the AOPis and the Gams, but when they wanted to marry, they’d want an ADPi.
Seriously, though, we were a nice bunch. A few hardcore partiers/slutty types in the bunch but generally pretty straightlaced and not snobby at all. Pretty much anyone who wanted to get in could, provided they had the grades.
Was there any hazing?
None whatsoever. The school I went to was really hyper about that sort of thing.
Who did you party with?
We generally had a mixer with every fraternity at least once a year, but most of the girls hung out a lot with the Sigma Phi Episilons and the Sigma Pis.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
I am mixed on this. They are expensive and I’ll make it clear to my kids that I’m not paying for it. However, it would force them to have decent grades. I would discourage it but wouldn’t blow a gasket if they joined one anyway.
This is just a personal observation here, but here goes:
I think, in general, frat brothers stick together after college more than sorority sisters do. I have seen men in their 50s receive help from their frat brothers from 30 years back, but never have I seen this happen with sorority sisters. Not that it never happens, I just personally haven’t seen it.
So I would probably be more supportive of a son joining a frat than I would a daughter joining a sorority. I guess I’d feel that in the long run, he’d be getting something out of it for years to come but she wouldn’t.
I was in AEPi, which is a Jewish fraternity.
It was an interesting experience. I think I probably would have liked it better had I been closer to the guys in the chapter. I’m not what one would call “greeklike.” People are very surprised when I tell them that I’m an alumn of the system.
The frat/soror made up about 15% of campus and covered an entire block, so yeah, they were a pretty big influence on campus. As far as our particular frat, we were one of three (and later two) Jewish fraternities on campus.
Lots and lots of hazing. Nothing I couldn’t handle, though.
We partied most often with the Alpha Epsilon Phi and Sigma Delta Tau sororities.
Son? Daughter? That’s a looooooooooooooooooooooooooong way away. I’m thinking, ya know, maybe I kinda need a willing partner first. Or a warm body. Or…I dunno, a turkey baster and a few test tubes?
Which one?
Alpha Sigma Phi
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
I think it was a great experience, on balance. We had a lot of great times, a lot of great parties, and when one of the brothers was going through a tough time, there was a real support structure there. I definitely would pledge again if I had it to do all over again.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
I don’t think it all ended. My best friend Chris and I are still close to this day. I’ve gone to a couple of weddings for other brothers. I don’t want to judge from my own experience, because I have difficulty maintaining relationships, but I know a lot of the guys are still pretty close with each other.
One thing that helped was that off-campus Greek housing was not permitted in the city where our campus was located. What the college did was take entire dorms and reserve them for each Greek organization. That helped contribute to the brotherhood, I think.
While on campus, though, we were one of the closest groups there was. One of my best memories is a group of about 20 of us going to cheer on our brother Kevin Higgins when he won the 1989 NCAA Div III wrestling title in his weight class.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
An interesting one – the chapter had lost its charter for several years in the mid-70s and early-80s because of its role in a party (the infamous “End of the World Party”) which got out of control and started a massive fire in a dorm lounge. So by the time I pledged in 1988, the chapter had only had its charter back for 6 years or so.
I can say that we definitely had the most varied and eclectic membership on campus. There were six fraternities on campus, and two of them, the ATOs and the LCAs, were typical jock fraternities. We, along with the Pi Lams, had the most different kind of people among our members. I wouldn’t say we were “popular” in the stereotypical sense, but our members were friends with everyone. We weren’t snobs.
Was there any hazing?
No, although I’m sure outsiders would think there was. For the week prior to initiation, each pledge had to find a brick. We had to paint the brick red, then in gray, paint on it the name and chapter of the fraternity, our name and our Big Brother’s name, and our coming initiation date. We had to have the brick with us at all times, and if we couldn’t produce it, do some small task like carrying someone’s tray at dinner. No big deal.
Who did you party with?
Among the sororities, our biggest party partners were the Zeta Tau Alphas. We had a really good relationship with them. We also did some events and parties with the Alpha Phis and the Phi Mus.
I have to say that our parties were THE best on campus, undoubtedly:
–My freshman year, we had a pig roast. My buddy Jim brought a full-size pig roasting grill from Toledo, and we got some massive pig. We reserved the Student Activities Center, which doubled as a kind of nightclub, and had all kinds of food. We also put together a band (me and 6 other guys, including a horn section) and did a set of about 20 cover songs.
–For Rush Week my sophomore year, one of our events included a live wrestling event, in which we had four matches, both men’s and women’s. The kicker was that the matches were held in a ring full of green jello. Cripes, that jello cost us a lot of money.
–Every year we had a kick-ass Kentucky Derby party, where we rented a place off-campus, had a live band, and partied all day long.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
If I was having kids, sure, why not? I had a great time, and I think it’s a great opportunity to be a part of something. I don’t consider it “buying friends,” as a lot of GDIs put it, because if the chapter doesn’t like you, they aren’t going to give you a bid to pledge anyway. Our chapter had great parties, we were involved in several charitable endeavors, we got to field teams for May Day every year, we were heavily involved in student government, IFC, and Greek Council, and had a lot of good times. I don’t think it’s essential to the college experience, but I think it adds a lot.
At the school I went to we had Alpha Sigma Phis. They were, by far, the “best” fraternity on campus, as far as quality of the members and their conduct. They were the “gentlemen’s” fraternity. I’m sure they partied hard but their grades were the highest and they were generally very well behaved.
If I have a son, I’d want him to join them. If he becomes a Pike, I will CRY.
Incidentally the ASPhis were really diverse on my campus too. They had black guys, Asian guys, white guys, guys from other counties, etc.
I see nothing wrong with it. It can be a good experience.
Were you in a fraternity/sorority?
Yep.
Which one?
Chi Phi (Theta Chapter)
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Yes. Not too sure what you mean by doing it again. But it was a bright spot in an otherwise bleak and miserable time at college. And I think I learned more about life than from anything else at college. Also, some useful skills like wiring a LAN and setting up a Samba server.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
I haven’t really been involved much since leaving, but I still keep up with some of the brothers, and stop by the house every once in a while. Many others have been a lot closer to each other than I am. For example, I recently went to a housewarming party for tthree guys from the house who went and bought a house together.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
We didn’t really have much of a reputation. For a while we were pretty small (when I joined, the chapter had been re-established only four years previously, and already starting to decline in membership again), and we never had any sort of niche, there being about 30 other fraternities.
Was there any hazing?
My fraternity was about the most anti-hazing of any on campus. Or at least the one with the least hazing. Actually, we would get kind of annoyed about other fraternities trying to sell themselves as not having any hazing, as we thought it wasn’t really helpful to the whole Greek system.
Who did you party with?
Well, Sigma Phi Epsilon was a few doors down the street, and were pretty cool, and we always got along with them. Phi Sigma Sigma was across the street from us, and several of our brothers have ended up married or engaged to their sisters. But they kinda folded at some point along the way. And RSE was not far from us either, but they were suspended from campus for several of the years I was there.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Still being young, and with the prospect of kids so far away, I’d feel like an incredible hypocrite if I were to think of anything I did just a few years ago as being an objectionable way to live. And even if I become an old fogey and think college students should be kept away from alcohol and parties, I’d still probably think the benefits outweigh the dangers. But then, I can’t imagine ever actually having kids.
Were you in a fraternity/sorority? Which one?
Triangle Fraternity (one of the three greek not to have greek letters – acacia and farmhouse the other two).
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
It was a GREAT experience. Yes, I’d do it again.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
It was a true brotherhood – my big brother and I are truly best friends to this day, and many of my pledge class still keep in close contact, although we’ve moved all over the place since undergrad. There is a group of us, the village idots, that still keep up and hang out.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
The depended on who you asked. Many things… we had the coolest event of the greek games (Sand Aid), but we were known for finding ways around all the rules during greek games. Our house was engineers, architects, and science, so that lent to a little of the “nerd” house phenomenon, but we had ways around that most of the time – it was more like animal house than anything else. But we were also the guys who could be trusted – the “gentlemen” house of sorts… (well, what they didn’t know didn’t hurt them)
Was there any hazing?
If what happened is thought by some to be hazing, then I’d disagree. I have fond memories of becoming an active member. I’d do it again if I didn’t already know what was going to happen.
Who did you party with?
We cycled through many houses… but we did have a pretty good repport with the Alpha Delta Pis as I remember (I pinned one of them after all)…
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
If some of the ways were the same, definitely. For instance, we had a house chef and pledges were soux chefs for him – taught me a lot about cooking. We had a lot of little house rules that were great in the long run – I look back on that time with happiness and I’d hope to share the experience with a son.
I can’t speak about letting a daughter into a sorority – I’m not as sure there.
Yeah, Tappa Kegga Brew - and I graduated Pseudo Cum Lousy <rimshot!>
[sound of crickets chirping…]
**Which one?
Kappa Delta Rho
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Well I was actually only with them for a year. But the year I was with them it was great. I always had someone to study with. There seemed to always be someone who had been in a class that I was taking. The Social aspect was also great, I neve rlacked for htings to do. It was good to have someone to depend on no matter what.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
After I left, I still remain in contact with a few of them. But I know that if I needed help I could call on any of them and they would be there, still.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
We had a mixed image. We were the smallest Fraternity, and we we lived in a house just off campus. We didn’t have a lot of dues coming in so financially we were th underdogs of the college. So when it came time for Greek Week (recruiting time) we usually had the smaller less elaberate events. We were also known to have good parties. The thing we were best known for was our grades. We always had the highest grad point average of any fraternity on campus.
Was there any hazing?
No, absolutely not. We had fun, when it came to initiations and the like. We never did anything to humuiliate or hurt our pledges. We believed that it would counter productive to have members who would not stand up for themselves, and have pride.
Who did you party with?
Pretty much everyone. We welcomed everyone, greek on non greek a like. We probably partied with the Zeta Tau Alphas and the Lamda Chi Alpha’s the most out of the other Greeks.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Sure, I would check into the reputation of the organization first. I think it can be wonderful expirence to a student. It provides a family support structure while the student is far from their real family.
**Which one?
Kappa Delta Rho
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Well I was actually only with them for a year. But the year I was with them it was great. I always had someone to study with. There seemed to always be someone who had been in a class that I was taking. The Social aspect was also great, I neve rlacked for htings to do. It was good to have someone to depend on no matter what.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
After I left, I still remain in contact with a few of them. But I know that if I needed help I could call on any of them and they would be there, still.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
We had a mixed image. We were the smallest Fraternity, and we we lived in a house just off campus. We didn’t have a lot of dues coming in so financially we were th underdogs of the college. So when it came time for Greek Week (recruiting time) we usually had the smaller less elaberate events. We were also known to have good parties. The thing we were best known for was our grades. We always had the highest grad point average of any fraternity on campus.
Was there any hazing?
No, absolutely not. We had fun, when it came to initiations and the like. We never did anything to humuiliate or hurt our pledges. We believed that it would counter productive to have members who would not stand up for themselves, and have pride.
Who did you party with?
Pretty much everyone. We welcomed everyone, greek on non greek a like. We probably partied with the Zeta Tau Alphas and the Lamda Chi Alpha’s the most out of the other Greeks.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Sure, I would check into the reputation of the organization first. I think it can be wonderful expirence to a student. It provides a family support structure while the student is far from their real family.
The hamsters must have been drinking again. Sorry.
Which one?
Originally I pledged Delta Upsilon. However the school was a commuter school, I lived off campus so was not able to be very active. I ended up dropping out (DU) midway through my second semester. The next year I transferred to another university, lived on campus, but because of my experience at UTA I was not really interested in pledging again. Then I heard about Alpha Phi Omega, a service, co-ed fraternity and decided to give it a try…
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Delta Upsilon-overall it was so-so. I never felt truly accepted, part was my fault because I tend to be reserved, though I feel I did try. Also, it seemed they were more interested in getting my dues, which back then was IMO much too high. I would not pledge it again.
APO-I felt that I was accepted, for me and not my money, and part of the group. Also, there motives were more altruistic in that they did many things for the community rather than have parties and do one token project a year.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
DU-like I said I felt like an odd man out. And since I left the fraternity and school for another university, that was it.
APO-yes, at first, but as time went on we eventually lost touch, which I do regret.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
DU-I am really not sure, because it was a commuter school I did not really hang around much. They were not the elites fraternity (I think that was the Pikes), they were just one of greek groups.
APO-they were looked down on by “greeks” however the groups I hung out with they were one of the better organizations to belong to.
Was there any hazing?
DU-none, in fact they went out of there way to be sure pledges did not feel that some of the “traditional ceremonies” were hazing. And if anything like that went on, I would have left anyway.
APO-none, but it is a totally different type of group from a social fraternity and that type of silliness AFAIK did not go on.
Who did you party with?
DU-we had a couple of mixers with some sorority (I forget who), though again I did not really feel I belonged and did not care for most of them.
APO-with whoever we could, other than most of the social greek groups
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
DU-if they really wanted to they could, but I would discourage it primarily because of the expense. But if they spent their own money for it, then they could. I feel that while they may have been worthwhile for connections in the past or at ivy league schools, now there just places to go to party.
APO-I would encourage joining this group. It was a much more supportive and accepting group. The fees were nominal so I did not feel I was buying friends. Also, they were not only interested in the next party. We did work hard with various community based projects, so when we did have a party it was truly a release and we felt we had earned it.
Which one?
The Brotherhood of Delta Lodge, or more simply, Delta. We used to be Sigma Alpha Mu, but split from the national organization in 1987 and became independent.
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Very positive, the best time of my life. I wouldn’t want to have to go through pledgeship again, but everything else was great.
Did your particular organization have true brotherhood/sisterhood, or did it all end the day you graduated?
Graduation was something of a rarity at the time, but we were/are very much a family. I still go back to my old college town to visit whenever I can. In fact, I’m there right now. Here right now?
What reputation did your group have on campus?
Pariahs, freaks, lunatics. We were/are sort of the “outcast” fraternity and attracted a lot of strange folk, artist and musician types, people who never would have joined a more “traditional” fratenity (not that there’s anything wrong with them). It was/is a very diverse group. I think we were the only fraternity in town at the time that had minority and openly gay members.
Was there any hazing?
No, nothing illegal.
Who did you party with?
We didn’t associate with other fraternities or sororities, or more properly, they didn’t associate with us. But we had a lot of musicians and had a lot of connections with the local music scene and threw some great parties for the community in general.
Would you want your son or daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Mixed feelings. It was a great time, but it did draw my college experience out several years longer than necessary.
Another Alpha Epsilon Pi checking in here.
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Tough to say… The college I attended had many activities that involved Greek life, but the entire Greek system (~15% of the undergrads) tended to be “looked down on” by everyone else there. I sometimes wish that I’d been a little more independent, but all in all things probably worked out for the best.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
As with any moderately large group of people, not everyone is going to get along with everyone else. I tried to associate with everyone, but it’s not always possible. I still see some people on occasion, but most of my brothers are living on the west coast now.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
Again, tough to say. We probably had a bit of a “geek” reputation (see Animal House) but generally we didn’t bother others and they didn’t bother us. We were one of the younger houses when I attended, but we started making a good showing in some of the competitions, we got a little respect.
Was there any hazing?
Nobody believed me when I answered this, but absolutely none. We were even a dry house (by choice, not punishment), and I think that showed we had a lot more fundamental respect for one another.
Who did you party with?
When I was there, basically just ourselves. The only mixers we had ranged somewhere between “uncomfortable” to “painful to watch”. I had a girlfriend most of the time, so I didn’t really need the help. We usually had a good turnout at the parties, usually the same “core” set of people.
Recently, though, I’ve been hearing that the guys have been more successful at that whole “girl” thing. Good for them.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Ask me in about 25 years when I’ll have to worry about it. I’ll share my experiences, but I know his/her milage will vary. Ultimately, they’ll have to deal with the consequences of the decision.
E-mail if, for some reason, you’re curious about what school.
I belonged to Sigma Nu Fraternity at Utah State Univ.
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Absolutely a very positive experience. However, I was in the right place at the right time. I would definitely say I learned more applicable knowledge in the fraternity than I did in college. If I were to do it over, under the same circumstances, I would show up a semester earlier to join.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
Yes, a true brotherhood. Most of my friends now were either fraternity brothers, or I met through fraternity brothers. A few weeks ago we had a farewell party for a brother who took a job in California. About forty guys and their kids and spouses turned out. Pretty good considering we graduated 20 to 17 years ago. A bunch of us will get together either in person or electronically for a fantasy football draft in a couple of weeks.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
Fairly good. Lots of elected student body leaders, several valedictorians, few guys with some serious money. Many of the guys were engineering students. Hard partiers on the weekends, closed parties though, so I imagine we may have been seen as snobby.
Was there any hazing?
Nope. During activation we had to live in the house and do the housekeeping, serve dinner, that’s about all. Some people may consider any deviation of behavior hazing, but whatever. No beatings, brandings, or any of that BS. No forced sleep deprivation, but it can be difficult for 8 guys to get to sleep.
Who did you party with?
There are only 3 sororities at USU, we partied with all of them. We also had very active little sister program. We only had an open party about once a year. Open parties were too hard on the house, and this was when alcohol could be served at parties.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Ironically, my stepson is a freshman at USU this fall. I strongly recommended he stay away. The current state of the fraternity is not comparable. If I knew he would gain life long (or 20 year long) friendships, learn what I learned, and so on, I’d pay for it. However, the same fantastic organization I belonged to has nearly disappeared. Instead it’s filled with slacker bums looking for a cheap place to live. They don’t wanna pay their bills. They don’t wanna make fellow members pay or hit the road. You have to be harsh about collection and payment, or you can’t pay the rent, gas bill, etc. They’re too busy to participate in school events. They party too much and don’t study. They don’t want to expand the membership 'cause then they’d have to double the occupancy on rooms that were built for two people. Wah, wah, wah. I’m afraid the time for a truly great Greek experience such as I had has passed. Too many lawsuits, too much liability, no one wants to follow the rules. But if you’re at the right place, at the right time, make sure you can afford it, make sure you know all the liabilities ahead of time, make sure the group is highly organized, and go for it.
Were you in a fraternity/sorority?
Yes.
Which one?
Psi Upsilon
Was it a positive experience? Would you do it again?
Yes, and yes.
Did your particular organization have true brother/sisterhood or did it all end the day you graduated?
True brotherhood.
What reputation did your group have on campus?
Didn’t have on.
Was there any hazing?
Limited, friendly, fun, involving alumni.
Who did you party with?
Pi Phi’s.
Would you want your son/daughter to be in one? Why or why not?
Yes. Good way to meet nice people and develop lasting friendships.
I also wanted to mention that since my school was a pretty good one, our fraternities tended to attract your smart, athletic, sometimes rich, ambitious evil fraternity from Animal House types who also liked to party. Jacket and tie cocktail parties were very common at my school. In other words, our fraternities actually make an effort to be “elite” and not just a bunch of fat stupid drunk morons.
I’ve noticed at a lot of less prestigeous schools or schools with a weaker greek system, the fraternities are often a bunch of complete and utter losers. My girlfriends college was like that. I used to love watching her sorority try and act all stuck up (because I was from another school). One of them was like “and how big is yourrrr social budget (all snotty like)”. She shut up after I told her it was about $10,000 a semester and that if her friends ever get tired of keg parties with fat guys, they should come over.
No.