I’d teach him/her to be the best little demon they could be and train them to hone their demonic powers. That way when they take over the world they’ll remember what a great dad I was and let me rule over my own little country. I’m sure they’d let me be Lord of Hawaii while they rule over the rest of the world.
::snaps fingers:: I knew I forgot something. I meant to also ask parents how they came to suspect Baby is a demon, too. Oh well.
Don’t shake the baby!
Then hire an agent, there’s definitely sitcom material in there. “Demon and Daddy” or “Raising Hell” or something.
Sitcom? I’m thinking reality show. Who wants to watch those families with seventeen kids when they could be watching this.
I’m reminded of the short clip: JackJack Attack (YouTube link) it was on the extra’s with the Disney/Pixar DVD of The Incredibles.
It’s about a young girl, a babysitter, who finds out that the baby she is sitting has about every superpower there is.
All this reminds me of an episode of The X-Files when Mulder got to deliver one of the greatest lines in TV history:
A “classic” case! 
As opposed to all those atypical cases of demonic fetal harvest?
I’d raise him to be a self indulgent slacker. Destroying or ruling the world would be work.
Stage dad. Excuse me Mr. Scorsese, what do you mean lil gospel doesn’t get the lead? Let’s step into your office…
ETA: I get to rule the the world until he comes of age right?
You may have to petition a court as next friend of the devil.
I’d probably have to hire a good PR firm to make me look good even after the world recognizes I’m half the reason why that thing exists.
I’m trying to remember that quote from Good Omens…
Try having three demon children. Oh, the wife says I shouldn’t call them that to their faces, but I calls 'em like I sees 'em.
Well, my daughter is currently a second grader, and already plotting world domination. And she doesn’t like pancakes - she prefers Farmer John links dipped in maple syrup.
I would summon a demon, ostensibly because I wanted to sell my soul. When the demon arrived, I would change my mind, then say, “While you’re here … how about taking the kid along with you?”
I likes the way you thinks, Snooooopy!
Are they made with real Farmer John?
[channeling “The Addams Family” of course]
Teach him to swim. He’d end up loving it, and start swimming every day like clockwork.
Have a priest make the pool into holy water overnight. Problem solved.
Or, I’d just deal with it, and get the little tyke to rob banks for me. Livin’ large.
Well first and foremost, I’d have to get a pair of guns that never need to be reloaded, maybe one black and one white. Second, find a great sword trainer and a nice tailor. Then, we go into business together, hunting demons and making video games
No problem. You’d be the devil’s advocate.