So you're both assholes! Okay?

Yes, another driving rant. But this one didn’t necessarily involve me except as someone who was inconvenienced.

Driving home after an errand last night, I turned onto the main road leading into my subdivision. This road is a set 25 MPH speed limit and it’s not usually bright to exceed that by much since the cops stake out the road - this is the road leading to my old high school and we all learned our lessons then since everyone seemed to get pulled over.

There are two cars in front of me as I turn - the first car is an older man in a Buick, the second a younger woman in a Protege. The guy in the Buick seems to be going a bit slowly, but whatever - my speedometer is at 25 so no big deal.

Then I notice that the Protege seems to be edging closer and closer to his bumper. And closer. And closer. She’s tailgating him so hard, she could give him an enema by sneezing.

So Mr. Buick apparently notices this and reacts accordingly. He slows down. To TEN freakin’ miles per hour. So we have Ms. Protege tailgating his ass, and Mr. Buick slowing down to a speed that might get me home in another hour. And there’s a line of cars behind me now who are probably all wondering what the hell is going on.

I just watch for the next five minutes as we edge towards my turn-off. And I’m absolutely stunned by the stupidity. Yes, Ms. Protege was a goat-felching moron for tailgating when the man was going the speed limit. But Mr. Buick is just as much of a moron for slowing down to go just about the slowest his car can go to retaliate - especially when there’s a huge line of cars behind him all trying to actually get somewhere. I honestly felt like leaning out of my car and screaming “Okay! You both win! You’re both assholes!”

I’ve gotten to the point where I try not to get angry on the road - I realized my road rage was starting to get the better of me, and although I never did anything in retaliation, I was tired of my blood pressure rising every time I drove - so I’ve calmed down a lot over the past three months. But situations like this just make me shake my head. Apparently, it’s fine to inconvenience 10 other cars as long as you make your point.


I understand your frustration but could the Protege lady not have gotten the message and backed off? That seems to be the signal the Buick man was trying to give her.

I HATE tailgaters when I am doing the speed limit or slightly more. I will tap my brakes to maybe let them know they are on my ass and most of the time they will back off. However, if my children are not in the car with me, I will drive slower and slower and slower until the asswipe gets off my tail.


Sorry, but to be honest I’d have done the same as Mr Buick.

You might think it’s childish pointscoring, but there’s another concern - safety. The tailgater behind me is going to crunch right into me if I jam my breaks on, and the combined mass is going to increase my stopping distance significantly. The only way to adjust for that is to slow right down.

Perhaps he was slowing to allow the woman to pass?

I have done this also. I have had someone tailgate me so badly that I actually pulled off to the side of the road so they could pass me.

Nowhere to pass on this road - it’s just a small road leading into a subdivision.

And I agree that the Protege chick was more at fault, Aries and Gary - I hate tailgaters, too, but on the other hand, the guy in the Buick should have realized that he was inconveniencing more than just the girl in the Protege - there was a line of cars quite obviously behind him. If he’d at least gone the speed limit after that, perhaps she might have gotten the message and backed off.


Sorry Ava, but inconveniencing people on roads isn’t the biggest concern. It might be a pain but if I’m in front of you and for whatever reason I feel that 10 mph is the appropriate and safe speed to drive at for the particular conditions, what else should I do?

If you’re in CA, and you’re at the head of a line of 3 or more cars, you pull over at the next place in the road that’s wide enough to accomodate you and let them pass, or else you risk a ticket.

Going too slow for conditions is almost as hazardous as going too fast.


If the man in the Buick was going 10 miles an hour, what would the woman in the Protege have to slow down to in order to back off? Stop in the middle of the road?

Yeah, tailgaters are a pain in the rear, literally, but the Buick’s driver didn’t even give her a chance to stop tailgating.