So, You've Decided To Fuck Up Your Kid

The BBQ Pit
1

What are you thinking? I understand you have little experience in either psychology or kid-related stuff, but this is truly assinine. First, you gave your daughter to your in-laws at 3 months, because you “couldn’t deal with her.”

They still have her, almost 3 months later. And they will for at least another month.

Fine. Ok, your husband is away and you were overwhelmed. I don’t get why you don’t at least visit her on the weekends, but fine.

Once your husband comes back, you’ll take the baby back. Nevermind that you haven’t done jack shit to work on the serious issues that made you give her up in the first place. No, you just left her with the in-laws and now part like a rock star, and expect everything will be just hunky-dory when this kid is returned to you after you don’t see her for half her fucking life.

Your ignorance astounds.

But tonight was the kicker. You announced that within a few months of your husband returning, and having the baby go through home life #3 (you alone, in-laws, you + husband), you are taking a job that keeps you away from home 6 weeks at a time. Possibly more. Why? Because “it sounds like fun.”

Way to totally fuck your daughter’s attachment up, for life. When she’s 14 and sleeping with every guy on the block and smoking crack just so you will pay some attention to her, please don’t say nobody warned you.

I swear to god, if you decide to go through with your other plan of getting pregnant within the next 6 months on top of everything else, I will slap you silly. Please take care of kid #1 first. That means actually being there. Physically. I know this is a difficult concept for you, but kids aren’t dogs. You can’t just board them for a few months with other people when you stop liking them.

Motherfucking dumbass.
:mad: :mad: :mad:

2

You know, inkleberry, I believe people put a lot of pressure on parents. They can be judgemental and overly critical of the way parents treat their kids.

But I wholeheartedly agree wtih you on this. What this woman is doing is beyond selfish. My own parents divorced about ten years ago, and I had no control over it. I was the victim of the selfishness of one of my parents, and what burned me up the most is that I had absolutely no control over any of it.

But the worst of treatment I had to endure is nothing, nothing compared to what this woman is putting her kid through.

:mad:

3

I’m pretty non-judgemental about how people raise their kids. I have exactly two criteria: happy & healthy.

This is neither.

4

There’s a dog in Kenya that’s showing better maternal instincts.

5

I laughed at the title but I am not laughing after I read the OP. Just makes you wonder about some people and makes you realize how important good parents are.

6

Amen. Makes compulsory licensing of parents seem like not such a bad, facist idea.

7

And this kid just might turn out great and the one with two good parents turns into a serial killer. Hard to say. This don’t sound good but it isn’t illegal either …

I’m glad I don’t have to take care of her kid… At least somebody is. Could be a lot worse too …

I’ve heard of immature mothers who could not get away from their babies who killed them. ::: shrug :::

Wonder if there is anybody who she would listen to?

Do you know her personally? Could you talk to her in a reasonable way? Maybe show how good your kids are turning out and stuff. Show her studies that will indicate that what she is doing is a bad thing?

Then, if she does it anyway, at least you tried to help.

Maybe turn her in to DHS? I hear foster care is much better than Grandparents in most cases.

She prolly waited until she was 35 before having kids… right?

Be nice to have some more facts about the case.

YMMV

8

I’m guessing the baby is a fashion accessory, not actually a part of her life. She deserves to be slapped silly. She deserves to have the kid taken from her, and she deserve to be sterilized. Kids need to know that they are loved. This poor kid will never have that. That makes me so fucking furious.

9

I don’t understand why in the world she is thinking of having another one if she can’t handle the first one! Can you talk her husband into getting clipped or something?

10

A-fucking-men.

11

I had a face-to-face argument a few years ago with a couple who spent very little time with their infant child; insisting that the time they spent with the baby was “quality time”, not “quantity time”.

I was nearly blue in the face and spitting while trying to get through their heads that, to an infant, “quantity time” IS “quality time”.

That piece of advice doesn’t change much as they get older.

12

It makes it seem like a good fascist idea. :wink:

13

Just playing devil’s advocate, but why aren’t you pitting the husband for a taking a job that apparently takes him away from home for months at a time?

I’m not saying that what she’s doing is right, but kids need dads as much as they need moms. If kid will be OK with Dad’s affection being sporadic as long as Mom’s affection is consistient, then they will be OK with Mom and Dad’s affection both being sporadic, as long as the affection from their grandparents is consistient.

Now, if you want to pit this couple for taking advantage of the grandparents, if that is occuring, be my guest. But there are lots of people raised by grandparents who never feel they were unloved or had attachment issues.

And if she knows she’s a crappy ass mom, letting someone else–who is qualified–do a better job might be better for the kid in question. But they shouldn’t have another one.

14

Maybe it would be better off from the grandparents to take her in permanently?

15

I’m with Manda JO – get yer nose out of their business and let them raise their own kids however the fuck they want.

16

Except, uh, she’s getting no affection from mom. Mom hasn’t visited in months. That isn’t “sporadic”, that’s absent. And the problem here isn’t giving to the grandparents, it’s the giving to the grandparents, taking back, leaving again, maybe having a second kid, etc etc. Basically bouncing the poor infant around like a ping pong ball.

If the baby were to stay with the grandparents permanently, I think it would be a great solution.

Especially since I’ve seen this mom in “action,” which mostly consists of her IMing with baby on her lap and not understanding that the reason it cries so much is because it needs to eat and be changed throughout the day.

17

“This time it’ll be fun and work out better.” I’m not kidding.

Apparently, kids are like pancakes. Just feed the first one to the dog. Pay it no mind.