Soft Cell Sarcoma

Since I posted the original thread here back at the end of August, they’ve obviously come up with a diagnosis. I hadn’t mentioned anymore about it because it’s been a pretty rough process for everyone involved and lots of anger (at David and his wife for dragging their feet over millions of issues that need to be taken care of – denial has always been one of his biggest traits – and not really putting him or the kids as utmost priorities one and two) especially from me. :frowning:

Anyway, in the interim, it’s been declared as Soft Tissue Sarcoma with a further prognosis of, as to be expected, not good. Six weeks ago that was, as I believe I stated before (sorry, but it’s too painful to go back and read for veracity), roughly half to a full year. However, he just started (necessarily or so remains to be unseen – since it’s supposedly so far along basically everywhere, I seem to understand it’s just to alleviate pressure/suffering and prolong life – and I’m just not sure what the real purpose is, but regardless…) chemo within the week and today he was coming back home (they’ve had him the hospital the whole time). Last night, they stopped shy of one final treatment in this round to check progress and evaluate his readiness to leave.

Apparently (according to his none-to-bright [and trust me, that’s being way too generous] wife) he’s gotten much worse and even has taken the entire thing really badly anyway. Which, unfortunately, we haven’t been kept much abreast of. I’ve been struggling with another bound of agoraphobia after my move and my/our folks have pretty much been out of town since Friday before last, plus David’s been highly doped up sounding when I talked to him daily and has done (rightfully so) nothing but sleep and, I guess, puke. So they’re keeping him and for Og knows how long.

I’ve said all this to (1) purge and actualize how I feel, (2) see if any of you guys knows much about this and what to expect as things advance, and (3) request whatever can be given… good thoughts, prayers, well wishes, whatever. This board has always been a great comfort to me in times of need and distress (and beyond) and I’m always blessed and thankful that I can return to it over and over again.

My sincerest gratitude to you all, even for simply taking your time in reading our story and for all the help from my first forte into this really shitty world of the impending death of a close (but I wish it’d been much ‘er’) loved one. To everyone who has, does or will face the same, my heart goes out to all.

~Kemi

I am deeply sorry for what you and your family are going through.

You will have such a special place in your step-brother’s children’s lives- you can help them remember the man you grew to be so proud of.

Please accept my heart-felt sympathies.

I’m very sorry to hear this sad news. While I do not have much knowledge of soft tissue sarcomas myself, I found a link to some mailing lists for sarcoma that might be able to give you some specific advice and guidance: http://www.acor.org/sarcoma-support.html
I certainly wish you all the best in dealing with this.

Thank you both so very much for the wonderful words and the helpful link. I’m just sorry to report, that in the interim since I posted this thread, he even sounds so much sicker and they haven’t even given him anything for his initial stomach pain/reaction to the chemotherapy. I am at a loss for how to do very well dealing with this, there’s in-fighting amongst all the other members of the families and costs (like everyone driving back and forth, housing for said while he’s in Dallas, etc.) incurred are mounting.

Also, they did end up keeping him an extra day, which was extremely taxing and today, he was given some other sort of shot that comes in with a price tag of 7K. What the hell?! And this from someone who’s married to a slave of the health care system and I still don’t understand. :frowning:

Anyway, any more suggestions on things to do that might help David or the kids? If I can only hold together a little bit…

Once more, silly enough as it appears, you guys are supporting more than you’ll ever know. Much, much gratitude is extended y’all’s way.

I’m very sorry to hear about David, and hope things get better in any way that they can, given the situation.

I’m so sorry faithfool for what you’re going through. I know it must be difficult.

I’m not sure you can do anything for your brother but you can always ask him what he needs. When my dad was sick from chemo he found it comforting to put on headphones and listen to his favorite music. We got him some of those huge cushy headphones that would block out all the surrounding noise. He could get lost in that and kind of forget how shitty he felt. Maybe there’s some kind of music or art or book that would help to get his mind off how crappy he feels physically. My grandpa, at the end of his life when had gone blind (macular degeneration), loved his books on tape.

And if he’s the type of man who will be comforted to know that his kids are being well cared for, it may help to spend some time with them. Take them somewhere, the park, the zoo, the mall. Someplace to get their (and your) minds off the situation and just be kids and have fun. Help them with their homework. Let them talk about how they feel, scared, angry, sad, etc. They need a safe place to feel what they’re feeling.

Best wishes and good luck with a tough situation faithfool. I’ll be thinking about you.

I’m terribly sorry, faithfool. I wish there was something I could say or do to help. What is your location? Are there any dopers near enough to offer more than kind words to support you?

My father was diagnosed with lung cancer next month. He says they told him it was treatable; but I don’t think he wants to treat it. He’s been really fatalistic since my step-mother died.

I hope the best for both of you, your whole family in fact. Do everything you can to comfort him; help him through the hard parts and make his life as good as you can.

last month, not next month. I’m not psychic, you know…

I’m sorry for your troubles. I can’t really think of anything to say except to take advantage of all hospice services. And that means ALL of you. They will help you understand what to expect, comfort you, inform you, and be a shoulder for your tears and anger. They’ll ease his pain, which will in turn ease yours. Best of luck to you and your family.