Teemings, nothing more than teemings,
trying to forget my work yet not done.
Teardrops due to too much laughter,
others thinking that I’m quite insane.
Teemings, for all my life I’ll read it.
I wish I’ve never seen it; I’ll never work again.
Teemings, wo-o-o teemings,
wo-o-o, Teemings & Zottis’ all to blame.
Teemings, teemings like I’d never read it
teemings I’ll ne’er forget it, & Cecil’s the name!
Teemings for all my life I’ll read it
I wish I’d never seen it, I’ll never work again.
Teemings, wo-o-o teemings,
wo-o-o, teemings again on my screen.
teemings…(repeat & fade)
(I’m ready for my pinch now Mr. DeMille)
(be kind, I’m not Fenris just a pal)
Argh! My Threadspotting theme has been vaporized in the Meltdown. One more time (as best as I can remember it)…
Threadspotting (to the tune of Tom Petty’s “Freefalling”)
It’s a good thread, sublime and clever
It’s funny, and it’s creative too
It’s a good thread; others should read it
It’s worth it to read it right through
It’s a long thread, with lots of submissions
There’s an in-joke that the newbies won’t get
Gonna send it off to TubaDiva
Gonna make sure they’ll all read it yet
And I’ll be Threadspotting
Yeah I’ll be Threadspotting
Now all the lurkers who don’t check in daily
Will see it on the Straight Dope homepage
And all the new folk will want to contribute
And all the troll folk will be rattling their cage
And I’ll be Threadspotting
Yeah I’ll be Threadspotting
(Threadspotting I’m-a Threadspotting I’m-a)
I wanna get my thread nominated
I wanna see my name on the screen
Want some ego gratification
Wanna know what I wrote has been seen
And I’ll be Threadspotting
Yeah I’ll be Threadspotting
And here I thought this thread was complete. But noooooo, someone had to go invent a new forum. A satirist’s work is never done.
You Gotta Know Art (to the tune of “You Gotta Have Heart”)
You gotta know Art.
All you really need is Art.
When you’re reading Café Society,
That’s where to be if you’re smart.
You’re here on Straight Dope;
Mustn’t sit around and mope.
If your tastes run more to Shaft than Cézanne,
Post what you can, and hope.
So you’re weak on erudition
And you can’t tell Braques from Klimts;
Feign a blasé disposition:
Tell them “Cubism’s for wimps”.
(You can make it if you fake it)
You gotta have Art,
Threads and threads and threads of Art.
Doesn’t matter if it’s Tolkien or Klee,
Jump in and play your part –
But you gotta know Art.
[sub]I need a drink…[/sub]
