Quick background: I bought my house on a half-acre in August 2010, on a quiet dead-end road. I am a single female and also a painting contractor. I’ve become quite good friends with several of my neighbors, including “Joe” who lives right across the street from me.
So this morning Joe calls me up and laughingly tells me that he had a conversation with “Tom” and “Jerry” who each own homes at the end of our road. Both are fairly reclusive guys and I’ve never actually talked with them. Apparently Tom and Jerry have determined that I am a lesbian and not only that, “getting more pussy than them and Joe combined.”
Whatever floats their boats; if they feel better imagining their neighbor is a horny lesbian, more power to them.
Mostly, I feel annoyed. Annoyed because a single, self-sufficient woman cannot possibly be straight (and therefore depending on a man)? Because being in a non-traditional “male” line of work means I cannot possibly be feminine? Because a single female without a man must by definition be a lesbian?
OK, so I am not annoyed enough to muster up any real ire - I actually find it amusing. And if it keeps those old fat guys at the end of the street from trying to hit on me, even better. I don’t really personally care what people who don’t actually know me think of me, but I am irritated that stereotypes like this persist.
Actually three available single men if you include Joe. He tried, failed, and decided I was probably not worth the bother of having sex with. So we got to be friends instead.
Well, of course you weren’t worth the bother: you’re a lesbian, after all!
I have wondered what my neighbors think of me, single woman with no male friends ever visiting. And, when my best friend, who wears her hair short and always dresses in slacks bacause that’s the most comfortable, and I go out, I wonder if everyone thinks we are a couple and that she’s the “guy.” Like chirotera, I don’t care what strangers think, but the possibility of knee jerk stereotyping bugs me.
Some people think I’m a nut, don’t let it get to you.
On a more serious note, being the neighbor of two reclusive guys that are spending a lot of time contemplating the sexual habits of other neighbors for no good reason - that that would scare me lil bit.
I suspect everyone thinks I’m a lesbian at work. I’m artsy. I am outdoorsy. I don’t have a man and I don’t ever talk about getting one. I have short hair. I drive a Subaru. No one has ever come out and asked, but knowing how people talk, I’m guessing it has come up in private conversation.
One day a coworker (who is a lesbian and married) introduced me to an employee she’s friends with from another department…for no self-evident reason. I don’t know for sure, but I think this coworker is gay too*. I think my co-coworker was playing the covert match-maker. If true, the two of them probably think I’m the biggest closet case ever.
*What’s very weird is that multiple times someone has mistaken this woman for me, even though we look nothing alike. We aren’t even the same race, plus she’s considerably older than I am. Only our hair is kinda-sorta similiar…but only from a distance. Sometimes I catch her looking at me with this *look *and I feel the urge to apologize for being her bizarro world twin.
Heh, you people are funny. (And thanks for the offer Spiderman - I’ve never had a superhero!)I’ve decided that I am more amused than annoyed. Maybe I should get a rainbow flag or two to display. And a Subaru.
The “end of the road” is the equivalent of three blocks long and there’s seven houses. Four of us are single homeowners. One retired couple, one middle-aged couple, and a younger couple with no kids who just bought the house on the corner last fall. We’ve got three ethnic minorities covered between us, so I guess I get to be the token lesbian.
Straight guy here. If someone thought I was gay, I think I’d be amused by the stereotyping (if any), or surprised, but not offended. To me, “gay” isn’t an insult, even if the mistaken “accuser” thought it was.
Just to be clear - I do NOT think “gay is an insult.” My largely recreational [del] outrage [/del] irritation was because of what I presume to be stereotyping of women by Tom and Jerry. Of course it could be just that they have no lives/get off on fantasizing about lesbians/are fat old guys who haven’t gotten any in years and are bitter about it.
Being a woman in a traditionally male line of work, I run into this and other stereotypes quite often. That’s the part that sometimes irritates me.
