I swear it seems like whenever I happen to be in a public bathroom, there’s always some poor schmuck that sounds like he’s dynamiting his colon in the next stall. Yesterday in the library I was washing my hands and I hear this deafening fart, sounding someone was tearing fabric. It kind of startled me and I stopped washing my hands for a moment (stupidly enough because I didn’t know what the sound was at first). So it stopped when I shut off the water. I start washing my hands again, and PFFFFFFFFFFFF! :eek: So I stopped because the sound was getting kind of bloodcurdling, if you could imagine a ‘bloodcurdling fart’ anyway. So it stops again, and I wash my hands some more, and it goes again. This time it keeps going even after I dried my hands and threw away the paper towel. I kind of loitered for a moment and I swear the guy must have had a fart that lasted 2 minutes straight.
WHY am I drawn to any post that’s TMI?? I alway regret it! :smack:
I remember having that happen once at a previous workplace. I was sittin’ there midning my own business, and heard someone washing their hands, as people do… and I ripped this hellacious fart! I knew the guy outside the stall heard it, and maybe some people not even in the bathroom. It was all I could do to not laugh out loud in that exquisitely betiled echo chamber.
My favorite TMI anecdote is about the time I was sitting in the stall at work when the door flies open, I hear footsteps running for the stall, and the person slams shut the stall door, drops trou and sits - all in one motion… followed instantly by a horrendously big wet phbbblatWHOOSH… and then I heard the toilet siphon “glug glug glug.”
I wanted to applaud, but I felt it wouldn’t have been received well.
Ah, my kind of thread! 
By the way, what is TMI?
So my doctor tells me I should have a check up my bowel area. Apparently this is called a sigmoidoscopy. He assures me it is painless.
On the day, the doctor introduces a trainee. She happens to be a gorgeous blonde. 
Things are looking up, I reckon.
Well I am asked to disrobe and lie facedown. The trainee smiles sympathetically at me as a lengthy tube is inserted in my posterior. I remain suave and smile back.
The tube contains a tiny camera, which shows that I am healthy for a long way up (so to speak). I decide not to watch the monitor.
Now I should mention that the tube is kept open with blasts of air, and that jelly is used to make a seal to keep the air pressure up. (You may be ahead of me here.)
So when I am given the all clear, I prepare a suitable chat-up line for the lovely lady. Just as I am about to speak, they remove the tube. :eek:
And I fart continously for 1 minute and 47 seconds (yes, I timed it!).
I’m still looking for Miss Right…
Reminds me of this
movie . Hilarious!
At the risk of being whooshed by an SDMB veteran, I’ll answer: Too Much Information.
Taiwanese Monetary Infrastructure
Yep. Same deal with me, an Upper GI with Small Bowel Follow-through, and a very attractive radiology nurse.
After the procedure (drink five or six pints of barium milkshake, watch it go thru your innards on the x-ray screen) I was sent to the changing room to get back in my clothes and I stopped to proposition the nurse: “It’s about noon - want to go grab lunch or something?”
She laughs like I had told her the funniest joke in the world, and said “No, you go get your lunch,” and laughed again.
Completely belittled, I dressed and got in the car to drive home. As soon as I turned out of the parking lot it hit me like a ton of bricks. Or more accurately, a ton of barium milkshake.
I watched the damn stuff moving thru my small intestine… I should have realized the imminent neccessities.
The nurse sure did.
Maybe you were sitting next to one of these
RoboDump
That was *you * in the next stall? Sorry, bro’. Hope I didn’t splash your shoes.
Dookie blood is after me!
Top story-telling!
Thanks - I really didn’t know. 
Cite?
Most kind.
I believe the custom is for me to now express gratitiude to the assembled company and inform them that I will be present for the next seven days…