Oh man, we do this all the time. One is an original tune, even, with varying verses to describe whatever Cringer (cat #1) is up to.
It’s way past dinner time.
Starving me’s a crime!
I’m Cringerrr!
Mom’s giving dad some head.
Hey, look! I’m on the bed!
I’m Cringerrr!
These blinds are fun to bat.
My rhythm sure is phat!
I’m Cringerrr!
And lately there have been various versions of this one for Gizmo (cat #2, and one we didn’t name so we usually shorten it to Gi’m or Mo):
There’s no business like Mo business
Like no business, my Mo.
Everything about him is appealing!
Everything a kitty should allow!
When my Mo starts going around meeping,
There is no sleeping,
He’s got to maow!
I think that singing to cats is very silly indeed. A much better option is to persuade your cats to perform interesting musical feats themselves. For example, my cats are currently learning to miaow the Al Di Meola / Steve Vai guitar exchange from ‘Race With Devil On Turkish Highway’. They are doing quite well, though it’s quite difficult to get them to not use the wah wah effect, and the have expressed a preference to learn the Rene Thomas tune, ‘The Real Cat’, instead.
You are my kitties, my little kitties
One of you is orange, the other’s gray.
You’ll never know, G’im, how much I love you
Please don’t take my C-Note [Cringer] away.
I think “[Stomp Stomp Clap]” Was maybe the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while…
My sister used to rap about the neighbor’s dog, named Drake…
“Drake is a dog
Who poops on the ground
And when he’s constipated he runs all aruond
Duh duh duh DRAKE!!!”
And my aunt’s dog’s name was Evelyn Rose, affectionately called Evvy Rose…
So to the theme of Every Rose Has it’s Thorn by Poison, we sang
"Evvy Rose
Has a bone,
Just likevery night
Has it’s Daw-haw- haw- hawn
Just like Every Cow boy
Sings a sad sad song
E----vvy Rose has a bone"
God, I usually just invent dumb little non-rhyming songs with stupid little tunes I make up on the spot, but I am going to go home tonight and sing this to Rex and C.C. until they can’t stand it anymore. It’s great.
Only I will have to change it to “kitty you’re a bad cat, fat cat” because mine are soft little indoor apartment kittens.
Kitty, kitty, what a good cat are you
You’re a kitty, that is so very true
Oh yes, you are a kitty
This song’s not very witty
You’re a cat, how about that
What a good cat are you!
Here are some of the greatest hits.
(to the tune of The Greatest Star of All from Sunset Blvd)
Once,
there was a kitten
If you said knock it off! he wouldn’t listen
He’d meow,
beneath the doorway
and he could keep it up, till he go his way.
Though he’s big now he will still climb up on your shoulder
and try to nurse your hair
I’ve seen so many kinck-knacks fall,
He is the greatest cat of all
(the the tune of the chicken dance song)
Hey there Tybalt kitty cat (hey there Tybalt kitty cat)
You are quite fat (you are quite fat)
Hey there Tybalt kitty cat (hey there Tybalt kitty cat)
You take lots of naps (you take lots of naps)
I am so freaking happy I’m not the only person on the planet that sings to their cats. Thought I was losing my mind for awhile.
I don’t sing any particular songs. You know how when you’re little and you sort of make up songs as you go along? That’s what I do. To whatever tune happens to be in my head at the time.
Apparently Elvis isn’t a huge fan of my singing though, as he tends to give me a dirty look and go back to sleep or run away.
