One day… edges of frame go misty and wobbly I dream of writing and directing a porn movie…
But not just any kind of porn movie, oh no! I’d want to put some effort in and make something I’d be proud of. Something unique, something with a story and characters that viwers can relate to, feel an affinity with, and so receive a much more sensual and erotic affinity with the film.
This, however, may not be worth the effort or money, so…
Serious question here folks. If you were cruising for a pornographic movie for personal or couples entertainment, would you go for something with a plot, with reasonable production values, with some fair acting, and of course a liberal dosage of uniquely photographed and erotically charged explicit sex?
Or would you stick with the standard dross, because it’s got big tits, big dicks, and lots of body fluids?
Well, I watched and enjoyed * X Hamlet, * the italian porn version of Halmlet. Of course, we didn’t actually watch the sex scenes, but skipped straight to the dialogue (the miracles of DVD). Funniest damn thing I’ve ever seen:
Huh??? It made no sense (well, it was porn), and just got more and more ridiculous. hamlet is sitting there talking to his mother, and she’s behind him on the bed making out with three women, and he just doesn’t notice.
And it included the dance during the credit sequence with the song, “to fk or not to fk” all said while waving a skull around in the air…
I would go for something like The Erotic Adventures of Blackman and Anal Woman. It had one of my favorite theme songs…
Oh…you want sophisticated porn!! Oops. Well, look for works by Anais Nin. I think that is the name of the director. His stuff gets as surreal as a French film, in a good way.
One of the best story lines I’ve seen in a porno was in ‘Chameleons’.
The women took the shape of others and boffed 'em to find out whether or not the person liked them or not. In the story, there was a whole lot of nervous guys running around.
Damn good plot.
But the problem was I got interested in the story and wanted to skip the sex and see what happened next to the poor shmoe.
i, for one, like my porn with a plot. porn for the sake of porn is just kind of boring. i would love to see a porn movie with something more to it than the “big tits, big dicks, and lots of bodily fluids”. but that might be just me.
The main plot was women taking the form of other women and then boffing their boyfriends to see how they reacted to another woman. It was great. She would change form right after the event and the boyfriend would completely wig out. I would too if my GF changed form after a fun session in the sack.
It doesn’t compare to X Hamlet though. I need to see that. I’m still laughing about the skull.
oh shush, tasha. i am the proud (or not so proud) viewer of “awesome anal asians” and “a girls affair”. they were both really dumb because they had no plot whatsoever. just because i have only seen two doesnt mean i dont know what i like.
and by the way, leave harry kunt alone.
I think for now I’ll be leaving all kinds of kunt alone. anyway, i think i have more knowledge on what makes good narrative. I mean, I did try to help you with the little suggestive narrative, but you want a spoon fed plot.
Porn, once upon a time, was somewhat sophisticated, they had three week shooting schedules… versus several month shooting schedules for mainstream films. Remember, I said somewhat sophisticated. This was when they were still being shown in theaters, films such as “Behind the Green Door”.
Today, thanks to the effect that vcr’s have had on the market for porn, they have 1/2 day shooting schedules and no one but the distributors make any money at all in the process. I read last year that the average porn “STAR” makes less than 25K per year.
I saw an interview with a porn starlet who said she would like to break into regular films. She also said in the next sentence that she couldn’t understand why actors in films needed to learn their lines. Which I thought was funny.
Well… I figured that, in real terms, the market was small. I am hoping, though, that sophistication is not practised because it just hasn’t been properly tackled. A lot of Euro porn, like Private, is amazingly big budget, but badly edited or plotted. I want to change that.
Just to give people an idea of what I’d like to achieve with this dream of mine…
Imagine you’re watching a nice romantic / funny movie on TV. It’s nothing too amazing, but it’s quite entertaining nevertheless. You can relate to the characters a bit, and are subconsciously imagining yourself as the lead. Then it gets romantic, sensual, intensely sexual… and it pans to a fireplace, then cuts to the next morning where the woman has bedsheets that always cover her breasts.
Well I want to take that idea, reduce the exposition, increase the sex, and actually show everything. In wonderful technicolour detail!
Hamlet on DVD? Kick ass. I have a dub of part 2, but the quality is way crappy. I’ve got to find a copy of that.
My dream is to one day film “Jizzmoppers”, a day in the life of two guys that work in a porno store (one works in the movie section, the other in the “toy” department…)
Anyone know how much the average jizzmopper makes?
