Unfortunately, no. That’d be something I could use. Instead it’s blah, blah, blah this, blah, blah, blah that after I’m dead. Not really useful to me at all. At least He hasn’t asked for a charge card number yet.
And I already got two copies of today’s promises, too. Even though I’ve “unsubscribed.”
Perhaps he can’t enlarge your penis, but he CAN get you out of debt right? Or solve your septic tank problems forever?
I used to have Jesus ME, but I’ve decided Jesus98 is much more stable. JesusME kept falling off the cross 2 days into it…
I think He can refinance my mortgage, too. Even though I don’t have a mortgage.
Yes, but the real question is can He create a mortgage so large that He Himself cannot refinance it?
Who Would Jesus Spam?
Man, oh man. So god is kind of like the McDonald’s “Winning Time” promotion. I have to redeem my free breakfast extra value meal by 5/16 or I lose it FOR ALL TIME!!!
Anyways, screw that doctrine. I’m an athiest, but thankfully I have Catholic friends, and one of them said he can emergency-baptize me if people start floating into the frickin’ sky or some preposterous thing like that, which as a Catholic he doesn’t believe in either.
That’s what god gets for setting up an administrative agency and statutory scheme then making no revisions for 2000 years, we lawyers have had alot of time to find the loopholes.
I question the mental abilities in general of any group of people who think Tim LaHaye is a talented author.
[Christian glurge voice]
Well, I’ve heard that He’s a whiz at Redemption of our Bonds!
[/Christian glurge voice]
::: ducks and runs :::
I have it on good authority that He too is a victim of spam.
Da da dadadada da dada da da da da da da…
For those of you scratching your head in confusion, think Monty Python’s Flying Circus. I can’t remember the name of the tune.
I joined their web community when I first started reading the series 3 years ago. None of the books were good after the first one (and even the first sucked writing style wise) but the last MONTH or so I get an email every day from them. The same list — “God’s Daily Promises” I unsubbed a week ago, and I still get them, so I tried again yesterday.
Grrrrr.
*“Salvation is available to all, but a time will come when it will be too late to receive it.” *
This provides eerie insight into why so many small electronics crap out right after the warranty expires.