Robert Frost said that taking the road not taken has made all the difference. But he didn’t say that was for the better.
We all (?) wonder where we would be now if we had taken a different path. It’s impossible to know, of course. I myself think Hollywood encourages us to think that if we’d just had a little more faith in ourselves, we could have been champions or something. Maybe.
In a lot of ways in life, I zigged when I should have zagged. Maybe I couldn’t have known. Maybe it’s in my nature.
A few years ago there was the woman who “got away” from me. But I later realized (from her posts on social media) that she really wasn’t the person I thought she was.
Coach your younger self. What would you tell that person to do?
Me? “You’re ahead of many of your peers, but keep improving yourself. Realize that beauty is skin deep. Also realize that there are many ways to be intelligent.
Judge people by their actions, not their words. Above all, love yourself.”
Duuude, chill. Don’t worry about skipping Med School. That crazy “touring the country in a van with a Christian Media Company” thing is fine, because you end up teaching art anyways.
Younger me to me:
Could you not use words like ‘Duuude’? It makes us sound like we never grew up.
Me to younger me:
Duuude, THAT’S the other secret I was going to tell you!
Don’t return home yet from wandering around Europe; tell mom and dad to sell your car and send you the money so can accompany that nice young lady with the long, curly hair to Nepal. Put off taking that job that will lead you to becoming a cubicle-dwelling corporate drone. Your gut feeling about you-know-who is correct.
Don’t be afraid of people - even the popular ones are just as scared and messed-up as you think you are. It’s not the end of the world if someone doesn’t like you.
And good for you for not taking the job at Dad’s office - the Navy was definitely the better path!
Younger Self, keep on keeipin’ on. You’re going to have some bumps in the road, and a couple of serious potholes, but that scenic road turns out pretty well in the end, and you’ll have earned a good trail for yourself.
Tripler
Oh, and “Go West, young man. . . go West.”
Give up sooner on things. Your belief that quitting things that make you feel awful makes you a failure is actually just a way to feel miserable longer.
The reason most of your family makes you feel so bad is because they don’t like you. Their reasons have nothing to do with you at all. See: #1.
There is nothing wrong with your personality. Nor is there anything special. It’s just different than most people’s. Really.
Like they said, use sunscreen and take care of your teeth.
Me in HS/college - Don’t be SO damned lazy. Sure, you are really smart, but you don’t have to rely ENTIRELY on your innate ability. If you just cracked a book once in a while, or decided to work hard at a sport/music, it would really pay off.
Me in college - Learn to imbibe in moderation. You don’t have to get completely blotto al the time. And A LOT of folk don’t start off their days w/ morning bongs.
Me in HS/college - yeah, words come easy to you, but science and math are a lot more interesting. Sure, being a lawyer maximizes your earnings our of what you do most easily, but it is a horribly unrewarding career in a field populated by folk you really don’t care for.
You could skip into 8th grade right after 2nd grade? Hey, don’t be a coward. Do it!
You know, just because you’re supposedly “brainy” doesn’t mean that you can’t try to do more physical things. Take some chances and try to get into shape!
Stop eating so much, and get more exercise!
Put the books down every once in a while. Try to be more independent, and stop being such a “mama’s boy”. She won’t be here, forever!
You got accepted to Columbia University, but you’re going to stay in Nashville and go to David Lipscomb College? What is wrong with you? You know that, deep down, you aren’t really a fundamentalist Christian. This is stupid! You’re just afraid of change…
Stop spending so much money on books and comic books! Sure, you enjoy them, but this is way too much of your discretionary income. Put some aside in a savings account!
I know that you enjoy working at the library, but if you get a higher-paying job, you might actually be able to afford your own home.
You’re still living with your mother at 30? 40? 50? What is wrong with you? Oh, that’s right, you don’t actually have any ambition in the conventional sense of the word. Weirdo!
Man, I wish you guys had all had a word with me when I was young. Even just the teeth thing would have helped.
For myself, I would tell the younger me - the mid-teens me, when it all starts to matter - Stop listening to these people, they are giving you bad advice. You happened to be born in a burned out town with no future. All these adults around you can only tell you how to be a better class of loser. That’s all they know. You’re going to have to get out of here and not come back. Don’t fret about things - act on them. Learn to trust your instincts. Better you make your own mistakes than have other people make them for you.
To my 15 yo self: Put down that first cigarette, else you will have a heart attack at 28. And you don’t need orthodontia; she will ruin your perfect teeth. Even now, 70 years later, I have had no cavities or other problems on the teeth she didn’t put braces on.