I can’t count how many times I have been approached by someone in a restaurant and asked to put out my cigarette when I was sitting in the smoking section. My standard reply is “No, I can’t put it out, but the non-smoking section is right over there.” What really bugs me is that these people make this request in a diner of all places. For those of you unfamiliar with the concept of a New Jersey diner–most commonly one side has booths, and that’s the smoking section. One side is a little fancier, with tables, and is the non-smoking, family section. Diner proprietors do this for a reason. The booth side is usually populated with loud, obnoxious teenagers (and I am almost ashamed to admit I used to be like that) and very tolerant smokers. If you are neither of those things, please go sit where the tables are.
I know it’s bad for me. I know other people don’t like it. I don’t like people who drive and talk on their cellphones at the same time, but I don’t pull each of them over to tell them so.
When I have to smoke outside some official building or whatever, I always do my best to keep my smoke out of the path to the door, and to properly dispose of my cigarette butt. I make the effort, but I still invariably get the nasty look or the polite coughing noise.
I say get a can of spray paint and delineate a non-smoking area outside your class building. Make it really tiny, too.
Yeah, remember, you MUST “respect” people who belong to the fashionable cults.
People get the respect from me that they earn. They start out as presuming to have earned it. By their actions, they lose it. Acting as she had would definitely prove, beyond the shadow of any doubt, that the little cultist in question deserves no respect, whatsoever.
Occassional smoker here (as in, 0-4 clove cigarettes per week)
I think the girl described in the OP was acting like a bitch. There are reasonable ways to deal with things that displease you, and her methods only serve to make a bad image for herself.
On the other hand, I don’t think any smoker has too much right to complain. She is polluting your ears with annoying crap, but all told it’s mostly harmless and a temporary nuisance. That’s pretty much what smokers are doing to non-smokers, except they’re polluting lungs instead of ears. Her rude comments leave a lingering feeling of resentment, smokers leave a lingering foul odor and a trail of dirty butts. She’s over-exercising her right to free speech to the point that it annoys others, and smokers are doing the same with their right to pursue happiness. It’s tit for tat, really.
Nonsmoker here, whose wfie, thankfully, has quit smoking.
First off, the girl’s rude. Period. Shut up, already. Most people should just shut up already. We don’t need to hear you conversations.
That said:
I have to second the idea that smokers truly have no idea how offensive their habit can be. They do lose their smell, or at least the cigarette-smoke-detecting component. My wife has just started to be able to smell the smoke on some of her coats that she used to wear while smoking. Further, the rest of us do not all find it a pleasant smell. I like the smell of woodsmoke. Hell, I like the smell of pipe tobacco! But cigarette smoke, especially the stale reek that lingers and settles into your clothes and hair, is, IMO, hideous. Not to mention the fun that happens when a smoker accidentally burns you with a cigarette (happened to me at least a half dozen times).
I often hear smokers talk about wanting to go up to militant non-smokers and blow a puff in their faces. You know what? We’d often like to have some retaliation against you. What would be appropriate? How about carrying a bottle of urine and dousing your clothes with it? You already stink like crap, so why should you care? I’ve also always fantasized about carrying a canister of some tremendously toxic chemical–radon gas, or maybe just some roach spray or other pesticide–and spraying it casually downwind in the direction of smokers. “Toxic? Carcinogen? What the F do you care? You can spray your foul-smelling poisons around, so why can’t I? I just happen to like the perfume that they add to roach sprays, not to mention the neat hissing noise, and the fun ‘ritual’ that surrounds cracking open a good spray–you know, shaking the can to make sure it’s properly ‘packed’, then just hanging out and letting a smoooooth stream of spray waft into the air. Mmmmmmm…”
Sorry. Had to get that off my chest. In short, yes, the chick is an annoying bitch. But the fact is that the habit of smoking encroaches on other people’s personal space and health much more so than, say, chewing gum. (Unless you spit the gum in people’s eyes.) So feel free to tell her to piss off, but keep the “blowing smoke in a non-smoker’s face” a fantasy.
I agree, this woman is a strident bitch. However, she’s got a point about the littering.
It amazes me how smokers who would not dream of tossing an empty food wrapper on the ground (and would in fact chastise anyone else who would) see nothing wrong with throwing their butts on the ground. We’ve had many a debate on this board about this. So many otherwise enlightened people try to dismiss or defend their practice of littering their butts. For this, and this alone, do they deserve my derision. (I realize that not all smokers do this, and I thank those who don’t. Well, actually, I don’t thank them, anymore than I thank myself for not throwing food wrappers on the ground. I mean, come on. It’s the default, normal, expected thing to do—to not NOT BE A LITTERING SWINE.) Sheesh.
However . . .
This is a good point. I’m not saying that bashing smokers should be condoned, and I personally don’t want to be preaching a sermon to anyone about the evils of smoking (they already know, I assume), but what the hell prompted them to start? Anyone under 50 presumably started after the obligatory “warning labels” were put on the packs (I think they were put on the packs in the early '60s), so no one can say that they “didn’t know” that smoking was bad for them. And anyone under 30 certainly cannot plead ignorance to the public anti-smoking climate. So they started anyway, for what reason I don’t know. What did they think would happen? They’d be universally loved and appreciated for lighting up? Come on.
So yeah. In a way, there’s a part of me that doesn’t drip with sympathy for someone who started a completely non-essential, expensive, obnoxious habit that causes some people (like our Lynn here) to have serious health reactions. They knew all of this and yet they started anyway. ::shrug::
Its just the way the kids are programed now a days, smoking is just one example. The way you reacted is exemplary , myself I will make it a point of confronting someone of that nature.
Case in point , I was reading page 6 the other day , when it was reported that some little nine year old , was screamin at Ben Afleck to put out his smoke. What are ya gonna do in that case ,lol.
Some would say its a backlash against individual behavior back in the day , but that also assumes that there will be another backlash sometime in the future , for letting the non smokers experience a darwinian selection process.
I think it’s perfectly acceptable to inquire about my smoking habits in a thread about smoking.
As most children do, I had a rabid, irrational fear of my mother dying. She was a smoker, two packs a day as perscribed by her physician at the time, to quitting cold turkey durking her pregnancies, to 1-2 cigarettes a day during my childhood, but never around us kids. I have a *very * sensitive sense of smell and even if she smoked at 8am while we were at school, I would smell it at 10pm when I got home.
I started smoking at 20 during a trip to Vegas. My BF at the time was 10 years my senior and a sporadic social smoker and it just stuck. It’s more of an oral fixation, really, curable by chewing through a pack of gum a day. I’m told that an addiction is 1+ packs a day and I go through a pack a week.
I have a real problem with smoking inside my car or home. I don’t want people to smell me coming or my guests to be greeted with stale smoke. I’ve come to rely very heaily on a product called Febreeze and it works wonders.
As for my classmate, I was very hesitant to say anything to her because, for all I know, her parents died of lung cancer or something equally tragic. I just ask for the courtesey of treating me as in individual with an undesirable habit rather than lump me with everyone else and ask me to stand downwind.
they used to prescribe smoking to cure anxiety, depression, all sorts of things. They gave cigarettes these gimicky names as well. Cooling Menthol for Asthmatics or something equally absurd.
My mother is in her 60s and she was prescribed smoking in her 20s.
Are you sure about that? I know back in the 40s and 50s, many doctors said there was nothing bad about smoking, but for a doctor to actually prescribe it??
I gotta call BS.
Okay, she was a bitch about it.
That said, smoke really does bother certain people. I’m sensitive to it, but can be around smokers ( a good thing, so many of my friends are.) The smell never goes away. The only smell more pervasive is fast-food grease.
Obviously the student in question has some serious passive-aggressive issues that won’t be solved by confronting her with the awful truth about her attitude.
The non-smokers who loudly exclaim, “I would never kiss a non-smoker” and “You really do stink, I wouldnt hang out with a non-smoker” don’t seem to realize that alot of smokers don’t -want- to be around rabid non-smokers. There are plenty of smokers around, we could be socially self-contained if need be. Being a smoker has never kept me from making friends (that I’m aware of) and has actually, most of the time, resulted in making new friends and opening up conversations with people I might not have otherwise had the opportunity to chat with.
That being said, it is bad for me. And it’s bad for the air. As are gas vehicles, industrial plants, blah blah.
The honest truth is that militant anti-smoking tactics are in and until the fad passes and people start attacking people who use too much body fragrance or drink coffee on the subway.
I work at a university, and there were small signs near the only entrance to the building (it’s under construction) asking smokers to stay 40 feet away from the doors. This is state law, AFAIK.
This didn’t work during cold or rainy days. So, they made new signs, four times as large and bright red, utilizing many exclamation points. Still, if it’s wet at all, they will gather around (and sometimes inside) the doors, forcing everyone to walk through a cloud of nastiness.
If it’s too cold for you, don’t have a cigarette.
That said, I’m not a rabid anti-smoker unless it’s a close friend and they are causing a group of us to have to wait (as in roleplaying when it’s his character’s turn). Also, when he’s sick and the cigarettes are making him sicker.
As for social smokers, there is another guy in our group that doesn’t smoke unless someone else is smoking. He smokes maybe once a month and has never purchased a pack. I’d call that social.
When they can make a cancer stick whose smoke will stay in its designated spot, you will probably not be bothered by those pesky non-smokers. And who can possibly imagine wanting to eat food without a disgusting, foul smell in the air?
:rolleyes: My contribution of cabbage-and-homebrew farts never seem to be appreciated, either. Go figure!
(Most) smokers really are clueless how disgusting they seem to the breathing world. I’m a rabid, militant, fundamentalist anti-smoking Nazi, and damned proud of it. I especially like the knee-high black leather boots and death’s-head emblem on the hat!
Fagjunk Theology: Not just for Sodomite Propagandists anymore!
Ok, I am a non smoker who really isn’t into saving the world from the evils of big tobacco but I can’t have people smoking around me.
I am allergic to something in cigarette smoke. I get a lungfull and the coughing starts. Then the sneezing. My eyes water and burn and my ears stopper themselves up tight. I had dinner in a restaurant with a smoking section once and I was sick for a week. I could barely hear, hardly talk and I was stuffed up and coughing for a week!
Now, I only eat in restaurants with no smoking allowed. I do not allow smoking in my home. I don’t go to bars or clubs or anywhere where people would be smoking. I quit bowling because once I got out of college and started bowling in the ‘adult’ leagues the bowling alleys were filled with smoke. Yet I go to the doctor’s office and I get stuck running the gauntlet through the smokers outside the doors. Or the workers on break at the supermarket who are all outside smoking by the entrance doors. I’ve done all I can to stay away from smokers but it is not enough. What else am I supposed to do?
Thank you very much for answering. I have three young girls and I am teaching them about alcohol and tobacco, and some of the questions are “Why do people start?” and never having been a smoker myself I cannot answer that question. (And my only smoking friend’ answer is “everyone smoked in Nam.” This is not likely to be a cause for my daughters to start.)
I hope you will not be offended if I interpret your answer as “Curiosity and (peer pressure/desire to fit in with someone you like)”.
But there is no per day limit on addiction. It is an addiction if you cannot stop.
OK, thanks for your answer. Now I’m off to see if I can find one of them anti-smoking Nazi hats that Gatopescado has
Yeah, curiosity is probably the most concise reason for me. And I do find that I am more likely to light up in the presence of smokers than non-smokers. It’s either smoking or eating for me.
Make it really tiny, too.