Spot the American!

[Johnny_L.A]

A recycled click-bait article has a list of ways Europeans can spot an American ‘from a mile away’.

1.“They act so amazed by things that are more than 200 years old, presumably because they don’t have many things that old in the USA.”

2.“You can hear them in museums when everyone else is extra silent.”

3.“They’re constantly wearing their college t-shirt, sweater or cap.”

4.“Tipping. Americans will try to tip everyone, even in countries where tipping isn’t a thing and can even be considered insulting.”

5.“Asking for the bathroom in a restaurant or public place. Do you need to take a shower? No. What you’re really looking for is the toilet.”

6.“They are the first to take their shoes off at airport security…even when there is a sign blatantly saying not to remove your shoes.”

7.“When Americans introduce themselves they never say they’re from the US. They always start with the state or city they are from.”

8.“They say ‘hi, how are you?’ and make conversation with the barista, restaurant servers, retail workers, etc… My country doesn’t quite have that friendly culture.”

9.“They are absolutely fearless when it comes to asking any random person on the street about anything. I’ve watched Americans approach people in my home country and abroad starting conversations with strangers that I wouldn’t dream of.”

10.“They always look cheerful and are constantly smiling and seeming happy. Tourists from other places look more neutral or even unhappy.”

11.“They’re always asking for extra ice in their drinks.”

12.“They ask for cheese on everything.”

13.“They ask for to-go coffee cups. Everyone else in Europe sits and drinks their coffee, but Americans always seem to be in a rush so they take their coffee to go.”

14.“They ask things like ‘what is that in degrees Fahrenheit?’ ‘How many miles?’ and ‘That’s two pounds’???”

15.“They assume stores stay open late or 24/7, even in European countries where most stores close by 7 pm.”

16.“They have impeccable facial hair. Maybe Americans get a trim before they go on holiday, but I’m always impressed by the tidy beards and mustaches.”

17.“The way they dress. For some reason Americans abroad dress like they’re doing some hard core exploring in the Amazon…even when they’re just visiting a European city.”

18.“They wear white socks pulled all the way up.”

19.“When they cross the street, they expect cars to stop for them. In my country, a car will run you down without the driver thinking twice.”

20.“They ask for ketchup no matter what they’re eating.”

21.“Everyone else is freezing outside and then there’s that American walking around in shorts as if it’s nothing.”

22.“They get over-excited over very ordinary events and say things like “OMG look that grass how green it is!”

23.“They pronounce things horribly and make zero attempt to say it correctly.”

24.“They complain that the portions at restaurants are too small.”

1. I’m fully aware that things are older in Europe. I appreciate the older sites, but I’m not all like, ‘OMG! That’s a thousand years old!?’
2. Not me. I’ve been told I’m soft-spoken.
3. Not me.
4. I’m aware that tipping is not a thing in many cultures.
5. I ask for the toilet.
6. If I see a sign saying I don’t have to take off my shoes, I am not taking off my shoes!
7. Guilty. When I went to Europe I said I was from California. I told people Californians were different from Americans.
8. Yes. I’m always ready to strike up a conversation.
9. Yes. See #8.
10. Of course I’m chearful! I’m on vacation! (And I like to make people think I’m a nice guy.)
11. I’ve never asked for extra ice.
12. I don’t ask for cheese on everything. (But I do like cheese.)
13. I never asked for coffee to go. I sat and enjoyed the weather and passers-by.
14. I never did.
15. Stores close when they close. But I didn’t go to Europe for the shopping, so it didn’t matter.
16. I don’t have facial hair.
17. I wore jeans and (usually) a short-sleeved, un-tucked, shirt. My sartorial sensibilities were not well-developed at the time. Nowadays I’d do ‘business casual’, but I’m sure my wife would think I’m over-dressed. (She occasionally thinks I over-dress here.)
18. I don’t wear white socks.
19. I just remember to look the other way in England.
20. I never ask for catsup.
21. Yeah, Guilty. I didn’t wear shorts in Europe, but I do tend to wear shorts when other people are wearing parkas.
22. Meh. I can appreciate beauty without gushing about it.
23. I make every attempt to pronounce words correctly, and I ask for forgiveness if I don’t.
24. Never had any issues with portion size. Nowadays, I eat less than I did in my 20s.

ETA: I recall that at least one person was surprised that I didn’t behave like other Americans.

[Whack-a-Mole]

@Johnny_L.A

1.“They act so amazed by things that are more than 200 years old, presumably because they don’t have many things that old in the USA.”

Eddie Izzard had a great bit on this (1 minute):

Eddie Izzard - Where The History Comes From

[Whack-a-Mole]

@Johnny_L.A

4.“Tipping. Americans will try to tip everyone, even in countries where tipping isn’t a thing and can even be considered insulting.”

I cannot say it is so everywhere but I was talking with a bartender in England (yes, actually England) about tipping and he said you certainly do not need to do it but if you do tip he won’t complain and will happily take your money. There did not seem to be any sense of offense. Just that the person was stupid and it worked in his favor.

Maybe some places it is offensive but, usually, people like free money so not sure how offense would be taken.

[Larry_Borgia]

Who gives a fuck what some troll says?

[Zyada]

Last time I went to England, we had the flight that gets you in at morning their time, which is around 3AMish my time. So, very sleepy, and when we got to the hotel, our room wasn’t ready yet.so they put us in the lounge to wait. Then I needed to pee so I asked the desk clerk where the restroom was.

He sent me right back to the lounge area. And I was too sleepy to remember another word for restroom. Thank goodness there was another tourist there to interpret for me

[Jackknifed_Juggernaut]

‘Bathroom’ or ‘restroom’, or ‘washroom’ as Canadians call it, are all classier than ‘toilet’. And I do feel that they skimp on the ice in much of Europe for some reason.

[Johnny_L.A]

@Jackknifed_Juggernaut

‘Bathroom’ or ‘restroom’, or ‘washroom’ as Canadians call it, are all classier than ‘toilet’.

Meh. I ask for the toilet. But then, I also say ‘Excuse me. I need to urinate.’

@Jackknifed_Juggernaut

And I do feel that they skimp on the ice in much of Europe for some reason.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been to Europe, but it strikes me that I don’t get ice in anything at a restaurant except for cocktails.

[don_t_ask]

@Jackknifed_Juggernaut

‘Bathroom’ or ‘restroom’, or ‘washroom’ as Canadians call it, are all classier than ‘toilet’. And I do feel that they skimp on the ice in much of Europe for some reason.

Quick, where is the restroom? I think that I’m going to vomit.

Much classier.

[Darren_Garrison]

@Larry_Borgia

Who gives a fuck what some troll says?

Maybe instant jump to outrage and calling someone a “troll” for making observations should be on that list.

[Cervaise]

As an American transplant to Europe who has had to shed a lot of my habits in order to blend in better, I can confirm that while the list is mostly clickbaity generalizations (tipping culture, again, really?), there’s some truth to a fair number of the entries.

However, one of them jumps out at me, the comment that Americans are much friendlier with strangers than Europeans. That one seems especially off-base.

Where I live, in Luxembourg, everyone greets each other, without exception. Get on the bus? Say hello to the bus driver. Walking up to the school to retrieve your kid in the afternoon, and pass another parent, who you don’t know and have never seen before? Say hello. Walking down the street, pass somebody working in their yard? Say hello. (Here, “hello” is the word “moien,” pronounced “moy-YEN.”) As an American, this was an adjustment; in the US, you just walk blankly past all these people.

In France, too, it’s customary to greet the shopkeeper on entry to their place of business. “Bonjour!” you say brightly as you come through the door, and the shopkeeper smiles back: “Bonjour!” The American is identifiable for not doing this, because in the US, the staff are furniture until you need something. The French shopkeeper sees them enter, waits a moment for their greeting, then says “bonjour.” The American jumps like a startled kitten and stares at the shopkeeper, who now knows they’re dealing with a rude American. Rude, of course, being culturally relative; “ignorant of the custom” is the neutral way to say this.

Of course, this can’t be included on such a list, because it’s contradictory to the “always friendly all the time!” generalization.

[Slithy_Tove]

Not seeing any anti-American slant, since a similar list can be made for Orlando, the San Juans, Wisconsin Dells, Myrtle Beach, etc.

There’s a site I surf where no week may pass without a “Trump/school shooting/shit healthcare” lists

[needscoffee]

The list is of Americans who have those behaviors. The many Americans who don’t act like that aren’t noticed as being Americans.

[Chad_Sudan]

@Johnny_L.A

When I went to Europe I said I was from California.

If you’ve got it, flaunt it.

[LSLGuy]

@Cervaise

In France, too, it’s customary to greet the shopkeeper on entry to their place of business. “Bonjour!” you say brightly as you come through the door, and the shopkeeper smiles back: “Bonjour!” The American is identifiable for not doing this, because in the US, the staff are furniture until you need something. The French shopkeeper sees them enter, waits a moment for their greeting, then says “bonjour.” The American jumps like a startled kitten and stares at the shopkeeper, who now knows they’re dealing with a rude American. Rude, of course, being culturally relative; “ignorant of the custom” is the neutral way to say this.

It has become routine in US retail stores for somebody on the staff to greet you as you enter. Not so much in grocery or big box stores, but most others. Their greeting is perfunctory and really means “I have observed you enter our store. You will be monitored for shoplifting until you leave. Have a (corporate) nice day. Oh, … and don’t steal anything.” The worker does not care whether you acknowledge them; they’ve done their job of implicitly warning you.

In stores I frequent where I recognize the worker I’ll be friendly back. “Hi Marie; good to see you again!”

In the others, I’ll just nod or ignore. It’s not their fault they’re required to do that, but I’m sure not going to pretend their warning was a greeting. That would be two people lying to each other in corporate-sponsored euphemism-speak.

[swampffox]

LOL. Imagine living in Europe, and not working for the Department of Defense.

[wolfpup]

@LSLGuy

In the others, I’ll just nod or ignore. It’s not their fault they’re required to do that, but I’m sure not going to pretend their warning was a greeting.

Must be a regional thing. No such thing happens over here, and even the perennial Walmart greeters seem to have disappeared.

I actually did have someone ask me if they could help me when I first moved into this new suburb, and a brand new pharmacy had sprung up among many other new stores. The place was deserted, and staff were all over the place and happy to help. Today? You can’t find help to save your life. Almost literally . I’ll go up to the prescription counter with a prescription, and the response is “and when would you like to pick that up?”. My answer of “well, here I am, and I can pick it up just as soon as you count out the pills” never seems to work any more.

[Balthisar]

There are two or three attire-related points in that list that would seem to contradict each other.

No one has mentioned W.C. yet? That seems universal, in Europe and Asia and southern Africa. Maybe not so much in the United States or Canada, though. I take my daughter to Chinese school which rents classrooms in Ward Church. It uses the abbreviation “WC” throughout the building, and even near the washrooms, but not for the washrooms. All I can think of when seeing the abbreviation, though, is the washrooms. I’m not a good Christian, I guess.

If I introduce myself as being from my city first, it’s because I’ve assumed you’ve already ascertained that I’m North American. It doesn’t matter Canadian or American, because once pegged as North American, there’s not really any difference to a local national whether you say T’rano or D’troit.

Number 21 applies to me any time I visit anywhere in California in April. I mean, dude, it’s over 15°, why are you still wearing a freaking hooded sweatshirt and slacks?

Number 22, yeah, if I don’t appreciate something I’ll feign appreciation. I guess I need to do it with more subtlety. For example, the castle in Ghent is truly freaking amazing and conforms to all of my Dungeons and Dragons ideals, but when I go to the so-called “castles” in the Loire valley, I just want to yawn at these rich-folks’ fru-fru palaces, but that’s rude, so, “oh, the lace on these curtains is so beautiful and represents the post Louis XV style transition as evidenced by this gold thread, isn’t this amazing!!?”

Number 23, hey, my German is pretty good, my Spanish is great, but it’s not my fault that old Pierre France designed his language to be double plus no speakable.

[Thudlow_Boink]

@Johnny_L.A

5.“Asking for the bathroom in a restaurant or public place. Do you need to take a shower? No. What you’re really looking for is the toilet.”

“Where’s the toilet?”
“In the bathroom. Duh!”

To an American, the toilet is the fixture, not the room.

whats the big deal with the word "toilet" in the US?

so exactly why is asking “excuse me, where is the toilet?” so offensive in the US? In Australia, UK and Asian countries where english is commonly spoken thats most likely what you’d say if you’re at a restaurant and needed to go. Ask that in the US and the waiters would look at you in horror… what the crap? why does the US have such a big deal about using the actual word for the place?

And in searching for that old thread, I came across many others, most of which use the word “toilet” in the American sense. Sample thread titles include “It’s a room with a toilet in it. Get over it.” and “Why do some places segregate men’s and women’s bathrooms when there’s only one toilet in each room?”

[Thudlow_Boink]

@needscoffee

The many Americans who don’t act like that aren’t noticed as being Americans.

Ah yes, good old Confirmation Bias.

[Jasmine]

Wow, a listing of 24? We truly are as annoying as I’ve suspected. LOL

@Johnny_L.A

12.“They ask for cheese on everything.”

Truth! I’ve had to stop ordering omelettes with cheese because of the amount of cheese put into them. The last Denver omelette I ordered with cheese had 3 eggs, veggies, and FOUR full slices of cheese. When I tried taking a fork full, I exposed a pocket of molten cheese. I managed to fold back the top of the omelette and scrape globs of the stuff into a side dish. So, no cheese, please!

Oh, in addition, the amount of cheese some of those chain pizza companies use is insane. In fact, one company advertises a “stuffed crust” pizza with even more cheese somehow injected into the crust itself.