Spotted a young Jewish mother and her daughter and her husband at Trader Joe's, and other shares.

[Darth_Panda]

@ioioio

Today at Walmart I noticed 43 white Protestants engaging in offensive behavior, including messing up the merchandise, pushing other people aside to get the best item, blocking the aisles, letting their children run amok, talking loudly on a cell phone, slowing down the checkout aisle, picking their noses, farting, and exposing various unattractive areas of their bodies.

I assume that this thread is the appropriate place to report this.

Yeah, I mean, blaming this on the Jews seems like a little bit of a stretch, but I guess I’ll go with it.

[TriPolar]

@ioioio

Today at Walmart I noticed 43 white Protestants engaging in offensive behavior, including messing up the merchandise, pushing other people aside to get the best item, blocking the aisles, letting their children run amok, talking loudly on a cell phone, slowing down the checkout aisle, picking their noses, farting, and exposing various unattractive areas of their bodies.

I assume that this thread is the appropriate place to report this.

These are clearly Protestant Jews from Northern Ireland.

[Marley23]

@ioioio

Today at Walmart I noticed 43 white Protestants engaging in offensive behavior, including messing up the merchandise, pushing other people aside to get the best item, blocking the aisles, letting their children run amok, talking loudly on a cell phone, slowing down the checkout aisle, picking their noses, farting, and exposing various unattractive areas of their bodies.

I assume that this thread is the appropriate place to report this.

That’s nothing. You should see what the Irish are getting up to this weekend!

[Jackmannii]

Just had to share - - -

Mrs. J. asked me to pick up a quart of 1% milk at the supermarket on my way home this evening. I start to take the first bottle with a March 22 sell-by date, then I remember this thread. Sure enough, three bottles further back is one labeled March 29.

JEW SCORE!!!

When I mentioned this achievement to Mrs. J., she confessed that she routinely checks for fresher milk too. And she was raised a Methodist!

Damn copycats.

[LurkMeister]

Another crypto-Jew here. Today when I was grocery shopping I made a point of checking the “good until” date on the packages of salad greens I was buying, and deliberately took two that had later dates. I didn’t leave a mess in the display, however.

[Renifer]

I do that with bagged spinach. The spinach with the latest expiration date will last the longest. Rotted spinach tastes gross.

I also do that with dairy products for the same reason.

Is part of your complaint that she left the picked over items in disarray? You’re right, she shouldn’t have done that. But there are worse crimes.

[Darth_Panda]

@LurkMeister

Another crypto-Jew here. Today when I was grocery shopping I made a point of checking the “good until” date on the packages of salad greens I was buying, and deliberately took two that had later dates. I didn’t leave a mess in the display, however.

That’s mighty white of you.

[April_R]

@Slithy_Tove

Must have been Sephardic Jews. Sephardic are spotted; Ashkenazi have horns.

I thought it was Mormons who had the horns.

[kayaker]

I once saw an Episcopalian kneeling in the shrubbery, masturbating. Coulda been a Presbyterian, but I’m pretty certain it was an Eposcopalian.

[ThelmaLou]

I converted to Judaism 17 years ago, and in the conversion class the rabbi told us that at Trader Joe’s we had to look for the latest expiration date and be sure to leave the shelf a mess. We didn’t have a Trader Joe’s in our city at the time, so the instruction was moot. But we got a TJs last year, so now what am I supposed to do? I like to buy products the day before they expire and leave the shelf tidied than I found it. I’m fucked.

[Little_Nemo]

@Happy_Lendervedder

Ah, the old Replace-the-Word-‘You’-with-the-Word-‘Jews’ game. I love this game! Great for karaoke!

“I’ll make love you Jews, like Jews want me too..”
“Jews are my sunshine, my only sunshine…”
“What I like about Jews, Jews wanna hold me tight…”
“Jews are so beautiful…to me…”
“Jews are the sunshine of my life…”
“Jews can’t hurry love, no Jews just have to wait…”

“Jews light up my life. Jews give me hope to carry on.”
“She loves Jews, yeah yeah yeah.”
“If loving Jews is wrong, I don’t want to be right.”
“Whoooooooo are Jews? Who who who who?”
“When Jews wish upon a star makes no difference who Jews are.”

[Darth_Panda]

@ThelmaLou

I converted to Judaism 17 years ago, and in the conversion class the rabbi told us that at Trader Joe’s we had to look for the latest expiration date and be sure to leave the shelf a mess. We didn’t have a Trader Joe’s in our city at the time, so the instruction was moot. But we got a TJs last year, so now what am I supposed to do? I like to buy products the day before they expire and leave the shelf tidied than I found it. I’m fucked.

Well, you could at least argue for a discount since you’re being so helpful.

[Loach]

@kayaker

I once saw an Episcopalian kneeling in the shrubbery, masturbating. Coulda been a Presbyterian, but I’m pretty certain it was an Eposcopalian.

I’m masterbating like an episcopalian. Nah, doesn’t have the same ring to it.

[Johnny_Bravo]

@ThelmaLou

But we got a TJs last year, so now what am I supposed to do? I like to buy products the day before they expire and leave the shelf tidied than I found it. I’m fucked.

Just say 10 Hail Marys and 20 Our Fathers and you’ll be good.

[elmwood]

@Loach

I thought February was rape month. Almost halfway done and I didn’t know march was Jew month.

They’re celebrating it at the supermarkets around here. Big pallets loaded with matzo, everywhere.

[elmwood]

@ThelmaLou

I converted to Judaism 17 years ago, and in the conversion class the rabbi told us that at Trader Joe’s we had to look for the latest expiration date and be sure to leave the shelf a mess.

My bullshit detector is going off. Real Texan Jews shop at HEB.

[Voyager]

What JamesQueue (rhymes with Jew - coincidence - I think not!) doesn’t realize is that she didn’t just randomly rearrange the packages, but set them in a special code we learn in Hebrew School.
Another fun fact - we Jewish New Yorkers never take the top newspaper from the pile, but always the second. That leaves the germs for the Gentiles. (Germs for Gentiles - band name!)

[kambuckta]

@Voyager

Another fun fact - we Jewish New Yorkers never take the top newspaper from the pile, but always the second. That leaves the germs for the Gentiles. (Germs for Gentiles - band name!)

Hey, I do that too…but only because the top paper is the one with weird creases and shit.

kam…gentile. Sorry to burst yer’ bacterial bubble Voyager.

[Der_Trihs]

@Slithy_Tove

Must have been Sephardic Jews. Sephardic are spotted; Ashkenazi have horns.

@April_R

I thought it was Mormons who had the horns.

That’s because the Mormons have all secretly been kidnapped and replaced by Ashkenazi Jews.

[Noone_Special]

@Alessan

Speaking for myself, almost everyone who annoys me on a day-to-day basis is Jewish. Telemarketers? Jews. Noisy kids outside my window at 1 AM? Jews. Overly chatty taxi drivers? Jeeeews. All of them.

True story.

And most germane to the OP – all the people looking for the freshest item on the dairy isle…? JEWS, every last one of them!

(yes, me too.)