St. German and others, is this a joke?

The BBQ Pit
1

Is this your idea of a joke? If it is, it isn’t a very funny one. I didn’t ask anyone for a DIME and I am offended that you would imply that I would. I’ve only been on the Dope about 11 years now, I think its obvious that I am here for reasons that have nothing to do with milking Dopers for money. Ask the Dopers who’ve met me at Dopefests. Ask the Doper who I lived with for a year.

How dare y’all tell me I have no reason to be upset by y’all prying into my private life. I could understand IF I had indeed asked for money, but I didn’t. I don’t want a dime from you and if you gave me one, I’d throw it back in your face. Don’t talk down to me – I am not your child and I am not your friend. You are nothing to me.

I am an American and I have the right to decide where I will live within these United States, and I choose New York City! I don’t need a reason beyond that to justify why I prefer to stay here. When y’all criticize that, it makes me think y’all aren’t even living in reality. Who do you think provides all those services wealthier New Yorkers enjoy? People like me, that’s who. And I am damn good at my job. I picked up a shift at another store yesterday, and the manager loved my work ethic. This city would crumble if it was filled with only white-collar workers and no one to distribute and sell goods, keep those trains running, and provide a thousand other services you take for granted. This is MY city. This is MY home.

I have had bad things happen to me. It’s my choice whether I share it with you or not. You aren’t “owed” explanations for a damn thing. I haven’t hurt you or asked you for a single dollar. Y’all act like I’m asking you to donate a fucking kidney. Would you take treatment like that from a stranger? I bet you wouldn’t. So why would you think I would?

Right now you may be getting huffy and thinking to yourself, Oh it’s your choice huh miss thang, okay so don’t take my advice. That’s right. I could live and die on these streets and you’d never know. That’s my prerogative. I’m not hitting Dopers up for money because I’m too lazy to turn a fan on my bunny rabbits. I’m asking for ADVICE and not condescension. Who do you think you are, speaking to me in such a way. My mother, as big a fuck-up as she is, would’ve popped me in the mouth for speaking to a stranger in such a way. I live responsibly for the most part. I am Straight Edge, which means no drinking, no smoking, and no drugs. I have always used birth control and I pay back my debts. I am a faithful lover and a good worker. Can all y’all say the same? Can y’all?

Don’t you ever, EVER imply that I am hitting anyone up for money. Who do you think you are, saying that? I would go hungry before taking a thing from your hand. I would rather be buried in a pauper grave than take anything from the likes of you, St. Germain. And that includes your sanctimonious opinion and “advice”.

2

Lighten up, Francis.
::joke, joke, don’t be hatin’::

3

Apologies for not linking to the thread. Here it be.

4

Not one person asked why you left New Orleans, only what was keeping you in New York. You could have easily answered by saying -I just like it here- and it would have been fine.

5

You posted details of your personal life, then indignantly declared that your personal life is nobody’s business. That’s silly and this thread makes it worse. Take a breather.

6

No. I posted details which are relevant, or which I feel are relevant, to the situation at hand. There are some things I don’t like to discuss. It brings up bad memories. If I say, leave me alone about this, and people won’t leave it alone, I get upset. There are also some things I don’t want in an easily searchable place on the internet.

The final straw was StGermain accusing me of covertly trying to get monetary donations. Twenty people could’ve asked me about why I stay in New York, and I wouldn’t have Pitted them. But I really didn’t like being accused of begging.

7

Ask for advice. Don’t like people prying. Pit.

I thnk you are being a bit too sensitive.

8

Did you miss the part where **StGermain **accused me of trying to get people to send me money? Wouldn’t that piss you off, just a teeny bit?

9

Around here? Nah. They don’t know me personally so I’d figure they were just being cautious. I would just assure them I wasn’t asking for money. I wouldn’t Pit.

It just seems that many of those types of threads end up the same way. Advice is asked for, advice isn’t what the OP expects, OP gets pissed off. If you are posting asking for advice with incomplete information you have to expect more prying questions to come.

10

People were trying to help you and had no reason to think there was any sort of sensitive issue about why you were in New York. Most of us don’t have sensitive personal reasons for why we live in a city. Most of us have public reasons for it.

No one was judging you. People were asking questions to figure out what they could offer as suggestions. I’m sure lots of those people regret trying to help. So, congratulations for that part.

11

What makes people think that moving from NYC would be a good idea?

Yes, it is cheaper to live other places but are there jobs there? What do those jobs pay?
She even stated in her OP that she may move but as a real last resort.

12

Sure. That doesn’t mean you can get pissy when people pry into your personal life in a thread about your personal life.

13

I don’t think people thought is “would be a good idea”, they wondered if it might be. In some cases it might be, in others it would not.

Mississippienne, I have no dog in this fight. But I’ve been here as long as you and am a pretty reasonable human being, and you are overreacting. Stop digging the hole and focus on your own situation. You are taking grave offense where little or none is called for. It’s not worth the emotional toll to keep heading down this road.

14

A better pitting would have been “Hey asshat, I wasn’t asking for your money.” Ya know, short and sweet.

15

I love how your accent gets thicker when you’re mad…:wink:

Guess you’d get more money panhandling in NYC than at the dope, so I understand your consternation. :wink:

I read your thread, sorry you’re having a shit time, but I have to admit a teeny part of me thought some dopers were going to offer you money or something. I think it’s a natural reaction to hear a tale of woe and to think that if one threw money at the problem it would help out.

Not sure what straight edge is, but No smoking No drinking No caffeine, responsible sex? I think it’s time to light up Francis!

16

Wow. That was a classic overreaction. The questions about why you were in NYC were relevant to your situation, which is so dire that you’re seeking advice from anonymous board-dwellers. There were about 50 better ways for you to respond to those questions, but you chose to be a nasty bitch about it.

Good luck with your financial troubles, sunshine.

17

You were overreacting. And for the record, I never thought you were asking for money. But people were asking a legitimate question - are you sure you can continue to afford to live in NYC? Cause it is expensive, yo. But if you had said “I love NYC; it’s been my dream to live here, I love this city,” a gazillion new yorkers would have stepped up to help you stay.

You did react rather nastily and it doesn’t make people want to help you. And yes, you thanked people at the end of your thread but before that you had several nasty responses to St. Germain rather than ignore him and focus on the other things.

I understand you’re stressed, and I wasn’t surprised by your comments in the other thread. This thread is definitely over the top, and you could use a break from this message board. :slight_smile: Just sayin’. When the people here upset me IRL, I know it’s time to step away.

18

Sorry but I have to wonder, did you live with this doper because you needed help or because you were sharing a place?

I ask because you really do give the impression of being very needy and dependent and come from a family of the same. If I remember correctly, neither you nor your brother are caring for your mother financially but his girlfriend is paying their bills. Now you’re having trouble and, as a last resort, plan to try to burden this person further.

Asking why, of all the places in this country you could go, you choose a place that is very expensive is reasonable. I have to wonder if something was said that hit home. Also, I don’t think dopers get extra faith points per every year they hang out here. People here from the beginning can be ax murderers, we have no way of knowing.

19

After 11 yrs on this board you’re shocked your thread didn’t produce nothing but sunshine and rainbows? I find that hard to believe.

Something I learned the hard way, through personal experience, when you’re pulling out the, ‘Who do you think you are?’, line you’re actully projecting your issues, (whatever they might be), onto others. No one’s responses were, in any way, about ‘who they think they are’, or ‘who they think you aren’t’. They were innocent inquiries, in an attempt to provide you with better, more honed suggestions. It’s not like you were receptive to the initial attempts.

Please reconsider before posting any more.

20

My aunt works for NYIT and makes a decent whack of cash, but she lives in New Jersey because its cheaper. I know a few people who work in Central London and commute from Greater London. Makes sense, no?