Star Wars II title: You must be kidding

Abbreviated from Associated Press story

 LOS ANGELES (AP) — The next installment of George Lucas’ science-fiction saga will be called “Star Wars: Episode II — Attack of the Clones.”
  Announced Monday on Lucasfilm’s official “Star Wars” Web site . . “Attack of the Clones” picks up 10 years after the action in “The Phantom Menace.” Hayden Christensen joins the cast as the young adult Anakin Skywalker, who evolves into villain Darth Vader.

George Lucas has had a famously tin ear when it comes to names, and I’m proud to see that he’s up to his usual standards.

“Send in the Clones,” indeed.

Well, we had to get the Clone Wars in there somehow. At least it’s not *Star Wars: Clone Wars.

I’m getting this incredible sense of deja vue
(but hey, some people don’t like going in the Pit) :wink:

What about Star Wars 2: Clonetastic! :smiley:

Jesus H. Christ, Star Wars is becoming more and more like Star Trek. How nauseating.

“Attack of the Clones”… such a B-Movie title… ugh…

Star Wars: A blatent attempt to make ludicrous amounts of money based upon an ancient (but good) script with terrible screne writers

Ahhh, god bless Lucasarts!

That’s about as bad as Revenge of the Jedi. Oh, wait, that was a red herring…

What do you want to bet that this title gets changed?

What about “A New Hope”…that was pretty craptastic.

But wasn’t “A New Hope” sort of backwards continuity? I mean, I really don’t remember that being attached to the first Star Wars when it came out, only when they released the videos years later to wring some more $$ out of fans waiting for “Episode 1” Correct me if I’m wrong here…

Especially given that it was only slapped on a few years after the original movie’s release.

Cinematically, I think George Lucas is like a fat, overweight athlete who was rookie of the year some time in his twenties, retired early, spent the following twenty years running a chain of restaurants, and now is trying to return to the game in his late forties in a kind of pathetic attempt to relive his glory days. None of his former fans want to recognize that he sucks now–they saw Phantom Menace and wailed, “say it ain’t so, George”. Unfortunately, the title Attack of the Clones might force them to face the cold light of dawn.

To be fair, I think GL is a victim of his own success in some respects. The space fantasy/science fiction genre took so much from Star Wars and went on to evolve so much from that starting point, that Star Wars itself would look like a throwback if released today (as a new movie). I think GL’s problem is that he hasn’t evolved along with the genre he kick-started back in the 1970s.

Doghouse Reilly wrote:

BZZZZT! I’m sorry, that’s the wrong answer. Thanks for playing. Don, tell Mr. Reilly about the lovely parting gifts … :stuck_out_tongue:

The subtitle of the first Star Wars movie has always been A New Hope. Just read the crawl at the beginning of the flick. I’ll grant you that it wasn’t used alongside the main title until just a few years ago, but it’s always been there.

Hey, everyone thought “The Phantom Menace” was a joke at first too. Trust me, it’ll grow on ya…

They could have just called it Attack of the 50-foot Clone and completed the B-Movie mystique. Though I admit, everything would sound strange probably. There’s just too much buildup. But I miss the Star Wars of my youth. :frowning: It was there in flashes during Phantom Menace, but Jar Jar and Anakin bungling their way to victory left me unsatisfied.

The Hoth scenes will forever remain genius.


This joke has now been used. It may now be removed from the running of “clever/witty irreverent things to say”, and will be placed in blackout status until tonight’s Jay Leno episode officially retires it. Your courteous compliance is appreciated.

From the Official Star Wars Website:

BZZZZZZT! Wrong answer! thanks for playing.

Take it from one who saw Star Wars on the big screen when it was first released (oh, so long ago). The subtitle Episode IV: A New Hope was not, I repeat, not, I say a third time, not in the opening crawl in the original release.

See all the differences between the original (and almost forgotten) release of Star Wars and the “Episode IV” version:

DOH! I really need to type faster…

Your powers are weak, Terminus Est. Now I am the Master!