Well, according to the folks over at Aint it Cool News , the rumor mill has it that the new title is “The Creeping Fear”.
Is it a great title? Not so much. I do think it’s better than The Phantom Menace and a lot better than Attack of the Clones. If nothing else, it accurately descibes a lot of hardcore Star Wars fans’ feelings towards the last installment.
Again, this isn’t official, but just what some supposed insider has leaked.
“This terror isn’t creeping, it’s clipping along quite nicely!”
Seriously, I remember reading AGES ago that the Episodes 1-3 would be called “The Rise of the Empire,” “The Fall of the Jedi,” and “The Balance of the Force.”
I wish those had been the ones used. But, alas, as all Star Wars fans are coming to realize, we can’t always get what we want.
Personally, I don’t give a damn what Lucas calls it. He could call it Episode III–Gigli and I’ll still go see it. I just want it to be good. I won’t lie, I did enjoy the first two, but they’ll never compare, and I’ve learned to live with it. But, for the love of all that’s holy, please make this one fun to watch!!
There is a site that has posted what they claim to be a plot outline for Episode III. Now obviously that statement needs to be taken with as large a grain of salt as you can find, but if it is close to the actual plot then Episode III may actually turn out to be a good movie.
Again, I make no claims as to how accurate this may be but the synopsis is here. Obviously this link, if accurate, contains major spoilers so click at your own risk.
Some awkward titles I eventually get used to, but I still don’t like Attack of the Clones. Not only is it completely B-movieish, unoriginal, and not epic at all, it doesn’t even accurately describe the movie! “Attack of the Clones” implies that clones are, well, attacking. The only clones that do any attacking are the good guys! And that’s not even the central premise, the clones are just a prop. It’d be like calling A New Hope “Attack of the Jawas” or Return of the Jedi “Attack of the Ewoks”.
At least “The Creeping Fear” actually makes a bit of sense.
He’s gotten most everything else wrong with these prequel films, why come up with a good subtitle now.
*Episode III:
The Creeping Plot
The Writhing Dialogue
Just Give Me Your Money and Shut Up
Too Many Loose Ends to Tie Up
Sucker Fanboys Come Back for One More
Try to Find Portman’s Nipples in This One
I Hate Real Actors Cluttering My CGI Scenes
It must be a bad time for long running sci-fi franchises. Seems like all the latest installations of our favorites have all sucked ass. Ah, well… c’est la vie.
Episode Three: I Could Call This Star Wars Sucks And Make It The Chronicles Of Jar Jar And You’d Still Pay Eight Bucks To See It And All You’d Do Is Complain On The Internet While You Went To See It Nine More Times In Costume, So Suck It Up, Fanboy
The Jedi Council spends the whole film arguing over whether whoever the baddies from the first two films were actually “an imminent threat” until the end of the film, wherein Darth Vader kills them all.
Assuming the franchise continues its steady decline in quality, I’m thinking the last one needs a little Nietzche in the title to really get across the unbearable, soul-destroying suckiness that is sure to cap the series. Star Wars Episode III: The Abyss Gazes Back sounds appropriate.