Straight Dope End Of Year (Self) Awards

Sometimes, great achievements and outstanding personal qualities don’t get the attention and reward they deserve. This thread is the solution, and it’s good to do these sorts of things at this time of year. Rules:

  1. You can award yourself any award you honestly feel you deserve. It can be topical (for something you’ve accomplished recently or this year) or not (a personal trait or achievement that you feel is worthy of praise and recognition). Try to stick to just one award, or (if you must) one major award and an honorary mention.

  2. You can’t nominate anyone else for anything (these are the self awards).

  3. Brief comments and/or acceptance speeches are allowed and encouraged, emphasis on the ‘brief’.

  4. Optionally, you may also describe the form your award takes: cup, trophy, cash prize, plaque, banner, sash, personal treat, date with the celebrity of your choice… or whatever.

I’ll start. I award myself the All-time Reverse Parallel Parking Award. I don’t claim to be a great driver or even a good one, but my parallel parking is the only thing in this life that I seem to have a supra-natural gift for. My passengers frequently comment on it. Even I don’t know how my brain automatically calculates the fine angles involved and ensures a smooth, right-first-time result.

My award takes the form of an inlaid gold plaque fitted into the car itself, and it entitles to me to an evening with the 1970s version of Jacqueline Bisset.