So, when is she going to sell her hair to buy you a new keyboard?
Welcome **Jakeline ** enjoy.
I hear the margaritas are great, I offer a simple beer or a White Russian.
Jim
Welcome, jakeline!
A newbie? Welcome to the Happy Hours Home for the Hopelessly Helpless!
Where’s the goat?
Hey Jakeline! You wanna 'splain that name or yours?
Jake-line, doesn’t sound like a broad to me.
Hi **Jakeline! ** Be welcome. Enjoy your stay. 
::peeks down shirt::
Yup, I’m a girl alright. It’s actually an amalgam of my nickname as well as my real name. Everyone does indeed call me Jake IRL.
We aren’t going to have any of that. With a name like Jake, I need my hair to maintain my girly image. These mishaps do happen. There’s a rather convoluted story about the time we both accidentally bought each other digital cameras for Christmas.
Good lord. And I thought the therapist bills were expensive before!
Yay! what fun! Another new victim…uh member! Welcome!
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I was a member here first, and thereby automatically still win any fights mentioned in public. I think that’s in a copy of the rules somewhere…I’m sure I saw that.
Doesn’t Hal still have it?
Oh, right … That was before “the incident”.
Oh, and, welcome aboard, jakeline. I think it was real sweet of you to look down your shirt for Zebra. 
Hello, and welcome!
Does she root around in closets and “happen across” her birthday presents as well?
Wrap a mouse up and give that to her (a computer mouse, not a dead rodent!) in lieu of SDMB surprise.
If someone gets the goat, I’ll heat the water…and sharpen the knives (heh).
Nah, she’s not the type that would ever try to ruin somebody’s surprise.
Actually, I think a dead rodent would be much more of a surprise, but I’m beginning to think there’s going to be dead goat all too soon…