Just wanna say that I don’t think Australians talk funny. I think it’s sexy. 
Yeah mate
Well, me and The Bloke had a grouse arvo digging weeds down the paddocks…fucken Bathurst Burrs, dunno if you’ve ever come across them but they are right bastards. Luckily enough though, I got the burning job…we chipped about a hectares worth, then The Bloke did the collecting with the old ute and the trailer whilst I had the fun of setting the big pile on fire…with the aid of a bit of diesel and juice mixed up of course! Big flames ensued, but by golly, it burned the crap outta the Burrs. We’ve only got another 173 Ha to go now! 
Brung me right back to the old Guy Fawkes days when the community would get together with all their household shit and set it on fire. Oh, and in those days the bloody Nanny Gummints allowed crackers and all too.
I swear, for all the so-called ‘safety’ legislation that has been passed over the last forty years or so, we’re still more likely to die in an accident. Why the hell can’t the PTB allow us to die having some fucking FUN.
Bring back the Penny Bungers I say. 
This from a bunch of wowsers who let the bloody poms beat them at the footie. And speaking of footie (of the round ball variety) there is no bloody Australasia, just a team of no-hopers and part-timers who can hold the world champions to account. Just imagine what we could do if we really decided to play the stupid game seriously. Call us back when you can do better than a draw against Ghana.
And everyone knows that the real sheep-shaggers are the boyos from the valleys. They certainly can’t play rugby. 
Si
And who the fuck let HIM in…quick boys, we need a bit of biffo to get the Kiwi out. Tell 'im there’s free beer AND free lamb down the Commercial Pub tonight.
The lamb is very tender I’ve heard. 
Oh, and I forgot to mention that me’ Blundies are rooted now too. Gotta go into Wang tomorrow and see if the Disposals joint has any in stock.
Not Happy Jan. 
Bathurst Burrs are tiddlers compared to Noogoora Burrs. They’re the size of gobstoppers. And remind The Bloke that a fire isn’t the end of the saga. You’ll need to hit that spot with Round Up in the spring. Plus chip all the seedlings from burrs that dropped off when carrying them to the fire. Only way to kill the bastards is to keep chipping and/or spray them where they growing before they set seed.
Alas mate, the farm is one of those ‘organic’ types so no Round Up for them burrs unfortunately. It’s a constant battle…the sheep paddocks are infested with caltrop, there’s paddy melons and thistles in the margins, and the poor old cows have the Bathurst Burrs to contend with. Luckily The Bloke finds nothing more satisfying than a days weed-annihilating to get the juices going.
This sounds like a very bad Bazza McKenzie movie. (No poofters).
I am off to spear the bearded clam before watching a rerun of Flash Nick from Jindivik.