Stupid slogans

We’ve had threads about this in the past, but rather than revive some mouldering old corpse, I’d like to make a fresh start.

I’m currently on my lunch hour, and one of my thoughtful colleagues brought me 2 of Taco Bell’s new chalupas for lunch. They were OK, not the greatest things in the world but I didn’t feel compelled to throw them away. So who is the marketing genius who thought it was a good idea to tell customers to do just that? “Drop the chalupa.” That’s just stupid. I know it’s supposed to be said from the point of view of the rat dog (which is easier to spell than chihuaua, or however it’s spelled), but I’m not a rat dog. I don’t want anyone to drop a chalupa on the ground for me, nor would I want to drop food I just bought on the ground for anyone else. It’s just not very well thought-out, IMHO.

So what are some current or classic slogans that confound, confuse, or just annoy the hell out of the Teeming Millions?

“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy

The Kat House
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Crestar Bank: “You’ve got dreams, weve got money” Which I think should be followed by “Nyaa nyaa, nyaa nyaa nyaa”

I find it extremely amusing that Microsoft is billing their Exchange/Outlook combo as the, “Digital Nervous System”

With the instability of windows, I’m not certain I would put nervous into the description of the product. I was chuckling throughout a seminar 2 weeks ago everytime the Digital Nervous System was mentioned.

The New York state lottery has a slogan: “All you need is a dollar and a dream.” My response is “If you hadn’t bought that lottery ticket, you’d still have both.”

I’m always puzzled by the TV ad for glasses where the woman says “I want you to see that tradition doesn’t have to be traditional.” Huh? Anybody got a Pretentiousness Translator?


Fiat Justitia

The one that really bugs me is Apple Computer’s adverbially-challenged “Think Different.”

It’s a long way to heaven, but only three short steps to hell.

Another campaign that I’m tired of is that Sprite “Obey your thirst” tripe. Yes, be an independent-thinking nonconformist by drinking what all the other independent-thinking nonconformists drink. That message makes a lot of sense.

“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy

The Kat House
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Tied for first place in the “let’s send mixed messages to the kids” category:

*Just Say No

Just Do It*

US Army Slogan–“Be all that you can be!”

If you get shot, you stop being.


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