Adds a whole new meaning to “Land of the Rising Sun”, eh?
And we have a winner!
Canthearya, please step up and collect your prize.
Once at university, I was accosted by an earnest young man who asked me:
“Do you believe in God?”
“No.”
“Then why don’t you just go out and kill anyone you like?”
Actually, that seems like a pretty good argument for atheism. But I don’t think he meant it that way.
You get dumb arguments on both sides, however.
" It isn’t fair to have a kid be born and live in poverty."
" Do you really mean that not having a life at all is better than being poor?"
" Well, yeah."
By that token I guess we should encourage people who are losing a fortune in the stock markets to jump…
Mmm, just thought of a new one.
Friend: All rivers flow south.
Me: Uh. No, they flow downhill.
Friend: Downhill, south, same thing.
Me: Mmhmm. What about the Nile?
Friend: That’s south of the equator so it doesn’t count.
Me: […]
Me: So about that party…
:smack: :smack: :smack:
I really, really hope you’re right, Revtim. You see, Steve has a bachelor’s degree in film studies (a fine arts degree – hence why he feels himself to be an expert in science). He prefers highbrow, artsy films and mocks the lowbrow stuff and anyone who watches it.
If he has seen a Yahoo Serious movie, I’m gonna have a lot of fun teasing him 
Elfkin, that may or may not be a dumb argument, but it’s nowhere near lizard-dumb.
Daniel
That sounds like your friend got a pinch of “continental divide”, a tablespoon of “water goes down the drain clockwise/counterclockwise according to hemisphere” and mixed them into a single mincemeat casserole that he baked in his brain pan. You can almost see his logic if you scrambled those two factoids together… (and mix generously with alcohol).
Thanks, Exgineer! What’s sad is that it sounds so made up.
If anyone else told the story I did in this thread, I would think it was exaggerated or made up, whole cloth (oops, I mean “ho cloth”). It’s not. That is our conversation, verbatim. I wish I had remembered a tape recorder that day.
At work, a bunch of us were sitting in the lunchroom taking a break. Our supervisor was talking about something dumb that one of the workers had done earlier, ending with, “That boy doesn’t have two brain cells in his whole head.” At this point another worker (also not known for being very bright) starts laughing.
Supervisor: What are you laughing about, you don’t have that many brain cells either.
Worker: Yeah, but I got more than him.
Supervisor: Oh yeah? How many do you have then?
Worker: Uh, at least 50 or 60.
crickets chirping, followed by unrestrained laughter
Another stupid comment I heard recently, as me and some friends went tubing down a local river.
“Does this river circle around and take us back where we started?”
The sister of a friend of mine told me one day that AIDS came from people having sex with dogs.
:smack:
Having spent a phenomenal amount of time around universities, I take special interest in stupidity in (supposedly) high places. E.g., the ads in the student paper for cars that “run good”. The last place I worked was a real lulu. However I found that being factual, logical, etc. was a negative attribute in such an environment.
E.g., there was pressure to change the standard rules regarding awarding tenure. The argument? “If everyone at this college who got tenured didn’t quit or retire we would have 100% tenured faculty and be unable to hire bright young people etc.” I had to suppress laughing (or responding in any way).
Egad.
(For those who don’t see it. The same thing can be said about any college at any time. It basically never happens in real life. E.g., our department soon saw a quick decline in both tenured and junior faculty. They now have virtually no tenure track faculty at all, let alone tenured.)
Ahem. Frankly, I think I am in the running for the victor here.
May I present… the solution to the problem of homosexuality.
"It is natural for men to have sex with women, and for women to have sex with men.
"Because only men have sex with women, women who have sex with women do so because they believe themselves to be men, or at least like men.
"Because only women have sex with men, men who have sex with men do so because they feel like women.
“Therefore, gay men (who wish to be women) and lesbians (who wish to be men) can marry one another and live happily in role-reversed marriages.”
Location: HIS395 - Baseball in Popular Society
Topic: MLB Salary Cap/Revenue Sharing
Point of Debate: Instituting a salary cap or revenue sharing would even the playingfield.
Guy’s Argument: “Well…but…a salary cap would mean the Yankees wouldn’t win as much…”
[sub]Ummmmmm…yeah…that’s kind of the idea pal…[/sub]:rolleyes: :smack: :rolleyes:
I’ve had some pretty interesting roommates during my college days. My sophomore year, I had two roommates, neither of which believed me when I told them that antlers on deer and such fell off and regrew every year :smack:. I wish I could remember some quotes from that one.
So, another of my roommates (for two years) was a fundie. On dinosaurs: dinosaurs aren’t really extinct. The reason we have great large fossils of dinosaurs is because, before the Flood, the lifetime of all animals was much greater. This is evidenced by Noah and the people before him, who lived to be over 900 years old. Well, since reptiles never really stop growing, and they lived a really long time, they grew to be huge. Hence, dinosaur fossils. 
Well, that sounds like a great piece of logic, there. So I asked him, what about the fossils that are entirely too bizarre, such as the plates on a stegasaurus? Where are the small retiles running around with little plates running down their backs? Unfortunately, we were at lunch when I asked this, with another fundie (hey, they’re cool people, just very ignorant on non-biblical history). The other fundie replied, with complete conviction, that the big plates were “an artist’s rendition.” There really never were any plates :eek:. What could I say to that?
Afterwards, I convinced my roommate (I hope) that those plates were actually real, and not a rendition.
Living with a fundie, I got lots of these stories. If I get some time, maybe I’ll post more.
In high school, in a lunchroom discussion with a fundie:
Me: I’m agnostic. (explains agnosticism).
Fundie So must be a commie as well!
Me: huh?!?
Fundie: Well you don’t believe in God.
Me: So how does that make me a communist?
Fundie: They don’t believe in God. Anyone who doesn’t believe in God must be a commie!
Friend of a friend believed that black people were the result of anal sex back ‘in Bible times’. Swore up and down that her preacher told her this, but then admitted it was just a relative who knew a lot about the Bible. I asked her why this doesn’t still happen today, and she said it did, she knew all kinds of loose girls who had black babies. Despite this girl being dumb as dirt I found it hard to believe that she wasn’t joking, but apparently she was dead serious.
Coworker: So you believe in evolution and the Big Bang and all that stuff?
Me: Yes. Don’t you?
Coworker: So why aren’t things just exploding all over the place?
Me: [Pause] I don’t think we should discuss this kind of thing at work.
I was having a heated argument with a guy with extremely conservative views and asked who the average working class people had to look out for them. He replied, “There is no working class anymore because all those factory type jobs are automated and done by robots now”. He also believes we should have a progressive income tax scale but the progression goes the wrong way; the lower income brackets are responsible for more of the crime, health and social security burdens and should therefore pay a higher per centage.Or something like that.
Someone at work who had a vendetta against me once started yelling about how much I was costing the company by “sending e-mails to other countries. We have to pay for those.”
He actually believed foreign e-mails were like phone calls. You paid for them.