“Dehumanisation
It’s such a big word
It’s been around since
Richard the Third”
Blind Youth by The Human League. School poetry at its worst !
Easy one.
“Someone left a cake out
In the rain
I don’t think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I’ll never have that recipe again.”
They don’t git no stupider 'n that!
Oh, yes they do:
“I am, I said
To no one there
And no one heard,
Not even the chair.”
As Dave Barry says, was Neil expecting the chair to jump up and say “Whoa, I heard THAT”?
No stupider than that?
You were pumping iron
While I was pumping irony
(Robert Plant)
Can’t complain, mustn’t grumble
Have another piece of apple crumble
(ABC)
picmr
Which reminds me of one by Thin Lizzy…
“Tonight there’s gonna be a jailbreak
Somewhere in this town.”
I’d hazard a guess at the prison !
There is a little known Styx song called “Plexiglass Toilet,” which, as I recall, has such gems as:
“Wipe de pot clean wit de paper
make it nice for everyone.”
and:
“He won’t get neat the lid for fear
that on his banana it will land.”
Then there’s the original B-side to Terry Jacks’ “Seasons In The Sun”–“Put The Bone In:”
“Put the bone in, she asked him at the store.
'Cause my doggy’s been hit by a car.”
Terry Jacks was never heard from again. I have no idea why.
Noy, I don’t know if this one counts as stupid but it certainly makes me wonder if the guys who wrote it had just stepped out of a math class:
From Creed:
For we have crossed many oceans,
and we’ve labored in between
In life, there are many quotients,
and I hope I find the mean.
This one puts the others to shame…and it was a hit too!
uooo eee ouu ha ha, bing bang walla walla bing bang
>>>MysterEcks wrote:
““He won’t get neat the lid for fear
that on his banana it will land.””<<<
That’s “near” rather than “neat.”
Damn computers.
There’s this gem from Offspring:
I wrote her off for the tenth time today
And practice all the things I would say
But she came over
I lost my nerve
I took her back and made her dessert
Play that funky music white boy,
Play that funky music till you die!
Till you die?
No, till you die!
Metallica:
Landmine
Has taken my sight
Taken my speech
Taken my hearing
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul
Left me with life in hell
Gee, guys, could you have been a little more depressing here if you tried?
And then there’s this classic from Motley Crue
Well now I’m killin’ you,
Watch your face turnin’ blue
Pure poetry.
“Israel in 4 BC had no mass communication” from Jesus Christ Superstar.
And if you think “Macarthur Park” was bad, you never heard Jim Webb’s lyrics for “Rosecrans Boulevard” including:
“Then there was the time you drove that little car
Down Sunset Boulevard at three in the morning
Doing ninety miles an hour in a thirty mile zone
And blamed me when you got that ticket”
(And, no, it doesn’t even attempt to rhyme.)
“Losing everything’s like having the sun going down on me.” (Just to prove Elton John worked with two bad lyricists.)
And lifetime achievement award for the absolutely worst song lyrics of all time: Kenny Rogers for “Coward of the County”
Wow. These are stupid.
The most stupid thing I have ever heard is from the Beatles, “Don’t Pass Me By”, written and performed by Ringo Starr.
“Don’t pass me by,
Don’t make me cry,
Don’t make me blue,
I’m sorry that I doubted you,
I was so unfair,
You were in a car wreck,
And you lost your hair
You said that you would be late
About an hour or two…”
What the hell does that mean? I guess good old Ringo was desperate for a rhyme. Another good is from Paul McCartney…
“C Moon C Moon C Moon is She
C Moon C Moon C Moon to me
It’ll be L 7 and I’ll never get to heaven
If I fill my head with glue
What’s it all to you?!”
I still have NO clue what the hell that means. Does anybody?
Just stopped by to nominate anything by LFO.
- I like some of Sammy Hagar’s music, but I must nominate him three times nonetheless:
- from “Why Can’t This Be Love”:
----“Only time will tell if we’ll stand the test of time.”
-uhhh, (picking nose) , , ugmmm, - from “Heavy Metal”:
----“she cuts through the crowd just like a wedge”
-umm, , yea, man . . (snort) - from “Can’t Get Loose”:
----“while time is going against her”
-going? . .uh, yea, like, man, yer outta time, so time is going against you, man , , ,
(snort)
- MC
Let’s not forget this gem from our favorite Swedish group
(no, not Ace of Base) ABBA. From the 1974 LP “Waterloo”, I give you “Sitting in the Palmtree” (no, that’s not a misspelling, “palmtree” is one word in this song):
“So, I will stay here
Among my coconuts,
So you will see dear
You’re everything I’ve got…”
I said na
Na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na
Na na na
Na na na na
(repeat one billion times.)
Manual sig line #1
I couldn’t pass up the chance to add the stupidest lyrics I have ever heard:
The entirity of Tubthumping by Chumbawumba…I can’t remember them right now and I consider that a blessing.