So, what are the dumbest things you’ve heard people say without meaning to be stupid? I’ll start with two:
The other day, flipping through the channels, I came across one of those forensic science TLC type shows. As I paused in my flipping, the announcer earnestly said, and I quote:
I was floored. Really? I thought it was customary for the Jeffery Dahmer’s of this world to give their victims full military funerals! Unmarked graves, you say? Who knew?
I came across this one today, reading about two Nobel Prize Laureates in Alaska who were stealing gasoline and attempted to check their progress with a lighter. Suprisingly, they caught themselves on fire, but that’s not the part that caught my eye. Alaska State Trooper Sgt Burke Barrick is quoted in this article as saying:
NOOOOO!
So, what are some of your favorite moments of abject stupidety?
From the NY Times today, re the Pope’s latest contribution to posterity:
"It also contained an admonition for Catholic legislators in bodies that are considering laws to recognize same-sex unions or permit gays and lesbians to marry or adopt children.
“To vote in favor of a law so harmful to the common good is gravely immoral,” said the document, which spelled out, on its final page, that it was being issued with the explicit approval and under the specific orders of Pope John Paul II."
Goodness gracious yes. Allowing people to form stable unions and provide loving families for unwanted children obviously spells doom for society.
The wife and I were watching a documentary on cats when the announcer shares the startling revelation that “Cats can’t read.”
After about a thirty second pause, the announcer explains that cats can’t read because they can’t see well enough to make out individual words and letters. Oh, OK. For those thirty seconds, though, the wife and I were wondering if we’d stepped into some alternate universe or something where this guy felt he had to dispel the myth that cats are literate.
So many of those stupid quotes attributed to Quayle and Gore are false that personally I’d need more citations that some random page of quotes from some dude who managed to make a web page.
I find it hard to believe that either of them is that dumb, or inarticulate.
Actually, what I’m looking for is more along the lines of the cat quote. Things that so much stupid because they’re, well, stupid- “If you die you’ve lost a big part of your life”, but stupid because they are true but completely unnecessary to say-“Cat’s can’t read”.
'A police investigation is under way in Edinburgh after the remains of a man were found in a suitcase which was pulled from a river.
Lothian and Borders detectives describe the death of the local man, who was in his mid-20s and who was fully clothed, as “suspicious”. ’
I have a cow-orker who refers to anyone with any kind of mental or even physical impairment as “retarded” :eek:
Shaking from Parkinson’s disease? Why, that makes you “retarded” in her mind.
She also describes gay people as “you know, having that dysfunction”. Oh yeah, she’s also not overly fond of Japanese people. Or Vietnamese folk. I’m not really sure why she bothers making any distinction, since she claims that any person of any kind of background that could be described as asian is “Japanese”. 'Cause, you know, they’re all the same thing, really.
She signed up on an internet dating site and was outraged that people responded to her ad. “Oh God! Who does this guy think HE is? Loser! F**k this pisses me off!”
Lovely girl, ain’t she? And inexplicably, she’s still single!
(And amazingly, all of these gems are from this week alone)
Well, it’s a little more of a stretch but I always love net headlines like “Pope speaks out against violence.” Woah, that’s some hard-hitting news there!
As an aside, you ever read a typo wrong? I read this as having the first word ‘cow’, as is the animal, and began to wonder what orking a cow might pertain to.