Thanks for my first laugh of the day!
“Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.”
Would this work with just plain ol’ embroidery? I don’t do much crosstitch.
I think there’s a book by this title, I’m just too lazy to confirm it.
“Put Your Big Girl Panties On and Deal with It”
One of my favorite T-shirts I used to wear when I was younger had a simple black & white graphic of a heart beat monitor. You know on TV how it goes "beep, beep, beep, then flat lines, then goes back to beep, beep, beep? Like that.
The caption was, “for a second there, you bored me to death.”
As a wedding gift, a friend gave me an apron–one of the full-length jobbies that hangs around the neck, ties at the waist and has lots of pockets–with the nicely embroidered message: FUCK HOUSEWORK. Along with the usual leaves & flowers…
I think we hid it when the kids got to the point where they could read. I don’t know where it is now but I really appreciated the sentiment.
This is awesome!
Someone gave me a little decorative plate that says, “It’s my house and I’ll do what I damn please.” I love that.
When I was married I kept trying to teach my husband, “Happy wife, happy life.”
I think I am going to have to learn cross stitch now.
I’d love a simple “Eat shit and bark at the moon!”
Thanks for the suggestions! “God Hates You” and “Bite Me” are decidedly on the list of projects. If I get time, “Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.”
Sturmhauke gets bonus points for the graphic idea
And I totally want to steal Hilarity N. Suze’s apron.
Guinastasia, sure this would work with embroidery. Though cross stitch has the advantage of being very mathematical, which is good for those of us who need the structure.
new idea: “cockass” for the Tenacious D fan in everyone’s life.
And underneath, in smaller print: You, for instance.
And from my husband–“When words can’t express your feelings, a machete usually can.”
I think I like you people - not that I can do it. Any chance for some pics?
I’d love to help you out
…
which way did you come in?
or
*I can only help one person each day
…
You are too late for today, and tomorrow is not looking good, either. *
Si
I love Subversive Cross Stitch, and have done several in her book as well.
I did the Babies Suck, and while my cousin found it hilarious, his wife wasn’t so amused. He still hung it up, and later told me at around four in the morning, he would look up at it and smile, even with a screaming hungry baby in his arms. Love it!
I did the Homo Sweet Homo for another friend who had just moved into his apartment. I did a border of the rainbow for that one. His friends ask about it all the time.
The Bite Me is above my computer as I type this. My grandpa thought it was funny, my grandma didn’t.
I’m currently working on the Tattoo one’s with Mother in them for my mom and MIL for Mother’s day, and have a few other lined up. Go to Julie’s website for more inspiration: http://www.subversivecrossstitch.com/info.htm
Get her newsletter, it’s got great info!
Good luck to you!
Guin it would totally work for embroidery as well. Have you ever looked at Jenny of Sublime Stitching?
Her transfers rock my socks!
I think it was just intended as a play on the phrase. Even if it wasn’t, it’s pretty good advice. Obviously, whore barbecue is something that should be done outside, on concrete patio and surrounded with tiki torches and drinks with little umbrellas in them.
“You’re still here - why?”
I made my own “Eat Shit and Die” in the same vein–it had little skulls and crossbones and piles of poo with little flies buzzing around them. It was good times.
I’m personally a fan of “If I want your opinion, I’ll read your entrails.”
I think I’m in love. That’s some nice stuff on that site.