Fewmets! (from A Wrinkle in Time)
Cheese and rice!
Mother pus-bucket! from “Ghostbusters”
Eat it
Crivens!
There’s always the good old fashioned “drat!” and “harrumph!”. My four year old thinks both of those are hilarious.
Tres bien!
When I catch a spider and take it out to the yard, I always say “Fly! Be free!.” Celtling rolls her eyes and explains again that spiders can’t.
Memory bubble: My Grandfather used to say “Great googely moogely!”
I’m ashamed to say how many different ways I’ve tried to spell that. It still doesn’t look quite right, but I’m moving on.
Reminded me of “Jumpin’ Jehoshaphat!” (Yosemite Sam?) which I always liked. But that being an actual biblical character, I guess I’ll pass on it.
Thanks y’all! Keep 'em comin!
When I was young, my mother made a conscious effort to stop using “Damn!” as an all purpose interjection around us kids. Her euphemism was “Rat tail soup!”
My favorites are:
Oh barnacles!
Dumptruck!
Fiddlesticks!
The last is the funniest because my older son said when he was 3- “mom, we say fiddlesticks instead of fuck, right?” Guess I edited my language too late…
By way of the great William Claude Dunkenfield (aka W.C. Fields), “Mother of Pearl!”
Then how about “Jumpin’ G. Horsefat”?
Another WC Fields phrase: “Godfrey Daniels”!
From a classic Cecil column Does every type of animal dropping have its own name? - The Straight Dope
Ha ha ha – classic!
My euphemisms at work are
Dagnabbit!
and
Sugar dumpling!
Back in the '70s, the nighttime Hollywood Squares had this going for weeks: whenever a celebrity didn’t know an answer, s/he would yell “bananas” instead of a swear. I think the joke was the louder/meaner they said it was how angry they were.
Homer: If you’re happy and you know it say a swear!
Nelson: Boobs!
Milhouse: Hiney!
Ralph: Mitten!
Cheesy Petes!
Sugar!
Figgin!
Spunes!
Instead of calling someone an asshole, we say cheeselog. We’ve been doing it for years - I think I came up with it in college, tho it’s so long ago, I don’t recall for sure.
We’ll even use it affectionately when talking to our dog. It’s a great word!
Consarn it all!
razzlefrazzlesnazzle or Sackafrackafushamusha. or shnikinrickinfashinrockn … Muttley the cartoon dog used to say this. It sounds like he’s cursing.
Asterisk, hashtag, popping bubble, swirling thing, percentage, ampersand, exclamation point.
Baloney! Baloney! Spumoni!
Rats!
That’s it - pure and simple. Helpful if you grit your teeth and throw a mock swing while you say it, or snap your fingers.