Survey: How Diverse Is Your Circle of Friends?

In My Humble Opinion
1

A survey, inspired by this passage from David Brooks:

"Maybe it’s time to admit the obvious. We don’t really care about diversity all that much in America, even though we talk about it a great deal. Maybe somewhere in this country there is a truly diverse neighborhood in which a black Pentecostal minister lives next to a white anti-globalization activist, who lives next to an Asian short-order cook, who lives next to a professional golfer, who lives next to a postmodern-literature professor and a cardiovascular surgeon. But I have never been to or heard of that neighborhood. Instead, what I have seen all around the country is people making strenuous efforts to group themselves with people who are basically like themselves.

Human beings are capable of drawing amazingly subtle social distinctions and then shaping their lives around them. In the Washington, D.C., area Democratic lawyers tend to live in suburban Maryland, and Republican lawyers tend to live in suburban Virginia. If you asked a Democratic lawyer to move from her $750,000 house in Bethesda, Maryland, to a $750,000 house in Great Falls, Virginia, she’d look at you as if you had just asked her to buy a pickup truck with a gun rack and to shove chewing tobacco in her kid’s mouth. In Manhattan the owner of a $3 million SoHo loft would feel out of place moving into a $3 million Fifth Avenue apartment. A West Hollywood interior decorator would feel dislocated if you asked him to move to Orange County. In Georgia, a barista from Athens would probably not fit in serving coffee in Americus."

For better AND for worse, I think Brooks is correct. Most of us, even those who idealize diversity, do NOT live in truly diverse neighborhoods or have very diverse friends. Most of us tend to congregate with people very much like ourselves (which may give us a warped perspective; recall the anecdote ascribed to Pauline Kael, who supposedly said in 1972, “How could Nixon have won? I don’t know ANYBODY who voted for him!”).

So, I ask, in terms of ethnicity, religion, politics and socio-economic class, how diverse are the people in your circle of friends? Do you have many (any?) close friends who don’t share any of your core beliefs?

And how about the neighborhood you live in?

2

My neighborhood (Capitol Hill in Seattle) may not literally be one “in which a black Pentecostal minister lives next to a white anti-globalization activist, who lives next to an Asian short-order cook, who lives next to a professional golfer, who lives next to a postmodern-literature professor and a cardiovascular surgeon,” but I wouldn’t be surpised if it was (though the short-order cook would probably need roommates to afford the rent).

On the other hand, my own friends aren’t quite that varied. Probably the biggest recognized variation is straight/gay. As for friends “who don’t share any of [my] core beliefs,” if I have any of those they’re friends I’ve kept from childhood, so our common experiences make up for any divergences we’ve had since graduation.

3

My circle of friends is fairly diverse- black, Hispanic, Filipino, Native American, and white. Only a couple of black, Filipino, and Native people, but as many Hispanic as white. That’s because of my location, I’m sure.

My neighborhood is pretty diverse. All of the above mentioned, plus Arabic (probably not the PC term but I’m not sure what is), Indians (from India), African refugees, and Russian.

4

Fairly diverse. Several Asians, a couple Hispanics, one Black, one Native. (and I know there is no racial term that is acceptable to everyone, so please accept these as a best attempt and move on).

Socio-economic is wide range from working class to executive.

The commonality is a way above average IQ.

(My neighborhood is super diverse.)

5

My circle isn’t very ethnically diverse at all. I’m white and most of my non-white friends are current or former coworkers, and while we might do things one on one, or invite each other to huge events like weddings, we don’t hang out regularly.

In my Whitey McWhite circle, however, there are quite a few differences in politics and religion and a decent income range. I don’t spend a lot of time discussing Big Issues with most of them because of those differences.

6

I’m in college, so my “neighbors” are quite heterogeneous. Yet, I’ve noticed a strong tendency towards self-segregation; in particular, black students almost always dorm in groups, and frequently form insular circles of friends. There is a much lesser but still statistically significant behavior among Asians, particularly those who applied from overseas. As for my friends, they are mainly white or Asian (by both the American and English definitions).

7

Thinking about it, most of my friends are white, South Asian or East Asian, though among all of them different countries are represented. In terms of religion, most of us are atheist, with a smattering of some different religions (mostly Christian, though). Politically I think generally we range from incredibly left to moderate right, with most somewhere around moderate left (in British terms). I think we’d all be the same socio-economic class, since most of my friends are my age and so we’re all poor students. :wink:

8

It seems like you’re asking two different question here - the diversity of the areas in which we live and the diversity of our social groups. I don’t hang out regularly with all the people who live near me - why would I? We have little in common - that is, we have diversity - which means we have little to talk about or enjoy doing together.

My building houses one elderly couple with a daughter my age, German descended but American for a couple of generations; one young Native American born and raised single woman; one family (mother, father, two children and another adult woman described as “sister”, but I suspect she’s another wife) from Nigeria; a very devout Mexican-from-Mexico Catholic family; a white collar white bread WASP man and his gorgeous Eastern European wife (their daughter left for college last year); and us, the sorta hippie/sorta not (white mongrel) family of four. We’re all friendly, and will enjoy each other’s barbeques and back yard parties, but the only one I consider my friend is the young NA woman - we were friends before I moved in here.

The neighborhood at large is even more diverse than my building. I don’t think you could come up with an ethnicity or country of origin that I couldn’t find in a short walk.

But yes, most of my *friends *share my interests - camping, neopaganism or non mainstream religions, bonfires, firespinning, alternative medicine, etc. Most of them, but not all of them, are white - not just most of my personal friends, but most of the people participating in that “lifestyle”. We do suffer a dearth of brown tones around the campfire, and we’re not sure why. It is something that bothers us.

9

My circle of friends isn’t diverse at all; they’re pretty much all big Latina dykes.

10

My circle of close friends is pretty diverse. I define my really close friends as those that I’ve known since at least freshman year of high school. I’m half white and half Mexican, we also have a Laotian, half white half black, white redhead, two black guys, an Italian, and a brunette.

I’m decidedly conservative but the majority of my friends are liberal. My neighborhood is also probably upwards of 80% black but it slowly gentrifying.

ETA: My college friends however, are entirely white, this probably from going to a small private school in Virginia.

11

Having ethnically diverse friends is not something I think about in terms of a Poll, and it’s not a choice in my opinion. People are people no matter what their race, color, or creed is. I don’t seek out or purposfully diversify my circle of friends. And citing what color any of my friends are is both obtuse and inappropriate.

To the OP - > When I sit on the lawn at a cookout in my own backyard I see people who are close friends all around me. Are they all the same skin tone? No, they are not.
Ok on edit that was a bit too snarky. I’t not inapropriate to ask how diverse a circle of friends are…But it is not a choice, and my circle is quite diverse. I just don’t like labels.

12

Well, you’re the one who chose to limit it to race. The OP clearly asks about diversity of “religion, politics and socio-economic class” as well as “core beliefs”.

13

I live in a mostly white upper middle class town. I pal around with one white woman in my community. I come from a white neighborhood that is now very ethnically mixed. I have work friends of all races but I work from home so I don’t see them face to face. My son is dating a girl of non-white origin (I’m guessing she’s latina, but I’m not sure) and has dated mostly women of color his entire life. I have a black girlfriend who lives in the city and has actually become tighter with my son than she is with me.

That’s it in a nutshell.

14

Pretty much all of my friends are white and democratic and hetero and college educated to throw in a few things we can use to differentiate people.

My neighbors, whom I also count among my friends, are mostly white, more frequently gay, and more educationally-mixed and politically-mixed than my friends.

This is from the New York Times a few weeks ago. Times Select required.

15

Depends on which group of friends we are talking about, although none of them are very diverse. Most are comprised of white, middle-class professionals. There is more variation in religion than anything else, I think, since we range from the born-agains to the atheists. Most are fairly middle of the road in politics as well.

The area we currently live in is largely Hispanic, filled with large Hispanic families.

16

What does that have to do with the question? Why are you so worried about what the black kids are up to?

17

I am white, 26, single, make $30,000 annual.
Out of a circle of 25 friends, 23 are white. 1 is black, the other is Indian. 23 were born in the US; one was born in Canada, another in the Bahamas.
I’m not up to date on the religion and politics of my group because it’s not really something we discuss. The few conversations we’ve had have all been in general agreement, so I’d see we lean left. I know for certain half of us have gone to college and graduated, I’m not sure of the rest.
10 of the 25 are single, 3 are in a polyamorous relationship, 6 are married, the rest are in relationships. We all make about the same, between 20,000 to 45,000. 2 couples are pretty well-off, but I don’t know how high they go.

As for core beliefs, the biggest point of contention with us is fidelity in relationships.

My friends locally live in diverse neighborhoods, lots of Hispanics, blacks, and others. Up north, the towns are mostly all white, with a lot of French-Canadians around.

18

Being atheist and non-white I often tend to end up being one of the factors of diversity where I live - for other people! But like WhyNot I don’t hang out with my neighbors. I don’t like hanging out with my neighbors, I am an extremely private person and very few people really know anything about my day-to-day life. Not that it’s that unusual, I just don’t like to share it.

That being said, I live in a neighborhood that consists partly of Polish & Romanian first or second-generation immigrants, lots of Roman Catholicism floating around, and partly of plenty of blacks. I don’t maintain a lot of friends but the majority of them are white, loosely Christian or agnostic, and middle class economically.

My SO is Chinese, so that’s quite a bit of diversity there. But like Phlosphr says I don’t really think about it. I take it for granted - I don’t particularly enjoy having too many Indians around me, so of course everyone around me is going to be diverse in some way from me.

19

As concerns what my town is like diversity wise, according to Wikipedia, “The racial makeup of the village was 83.05% White, 2.15% African American, 0.22% Native American, 7.56% Asian, 0.04% Pacific Islander, 5.08% from other races, and 1.89% from two or more races. Hispanic or Latino of any race were 14.12% of the population.”

I really don’t hang out with my neighbors - my husband and I pretty much keep to ourselves in our neighborhood (except for the one neighbor my husband keeps getting into arguments with cause the guy is a tool). As to our circle of friends, they tend to be white, blue collar, have the same interests sports wise as us, and hang out in the same bars we do. Some my husband has grown up with - I’ve known them for 12 years. We’re mostly republican, me and one other girl are the only ones that have any education beyond high school. Some are bartenders, most are mechanics, a few are union electricians, one’s a retired roofer, one is unemployed - actually, he’s the only one that IS kinda diverse - he’s from Texas. (The rest of us were born and raised in the suburbs of Chicago. Except for Jeff - he’s from California - which frankly, now that I think about it, explains a lot. ) :smiley:

20

My neighborhood is pretty monoracial, monoethnic and monocultural, but different from mine. Does that count as diversity?

My circle of friends is a mix of Japanese and white (mostly American, but a few Scandinavians). Back when I was teaching in more rural Japan, it included more Ozzies, Kiwis, Canucks, Africans and Brazilians. Basically, we were linked together by the common experience of being foreigners who didn’t have large communities of our own groups. And alcohol.