You have the utmost wonderful ability to annoy the crap out of everyone whenever you open your big mouth. Every opinion you state is going to rapture someone’s brain nerves or cause anyone with hypertenisons to go into an immediate heart attack.
And tacking “No offense” at the end of your ill-concieved, idiotic comments doesn’t help a single bit.
Thanks for your beautifully candid opinon about me. It may be true, but at any rate, there’s something I want to tell you…
take deep breath
I think you are an infinite loop stuck in the Matrix, a blight upon a world, a reincarination of Hilter, the missing Jack the Ripper, as whinny as Anakin, twice as whinny as Skywalker, as mad as a hatter with a bad hair day, breathe as annoying as Darth Vadar, shall be sliced into half by Darth Maul, are a friend of Jar Jar Blinks, are a wood chuck which chuck too much wood, are someone who keep asking how much wood a wood chuck would chuck if a wood chuck will chuck world, are someone who sells too much seashell at the seashore, are depriving a brain-damage insitute for a chance to discover a breakthrough, are a potential scarifice for Cthulhu, area disgrace to the society of the Morons, are dumber than the dumbell in the gym, are a face which could scare Tarzan, are someone which even the SARS virus would pass by, shall be ignored by Santa Claus, shall be casted down into the pit of fire, shall be forced to watch Ishatr and Battlefiled Earth a few million times and are not worth a damn to get mad over with,
Actually “no offense” means just the opposite, amusingly enough. In that context, it acts as an insult enhancer.
Not only are you a moron, but you are such an obvious moron that you should not take offense at me pointing it out. Its like, hey no offense, but your fly has been open all day. Just pointing out the painful truth, and that you are not allowed to take umbridge at it.
That said, just point out that your sorry, but you didn’t know that the crack-dealing prostitute you had arrested was his mom and that its not fair that he still is carrying a grudge. No offense, of course.
JuanitaTech,
I don’t know if that sentence is offensive, but I guess it can be seen as saying you don’t like what the other person is wearing–so much so that you wouldn’t wear it.
On the other hand, it could also mean, “Wow, that’s a shitty outfit, but you’re so gorgeous that you make it look good!”
Telling me “I don’t mean any offense, but…” is about like saying “I’m about to kick you in the nuts, but I want you to prepare to protect yourself first.” Other meaningless prefaces we should abolish from the language:
“I hope you won’t take this the wrong way.”
“Nothing personal, but…”
“My I offer some constructive criticism?” (an oxymoron if I ever heard one). This one is sometimes disguised as “advice” or “a suggestion.”
Sometimes you need to suggest to someone a positive change they can make. This is also a criticism, by definition. Saying “no offense” means no offense is intended. If you’re saying “No offense, but you’re a genocidal maniac” it’s offensive whether you mean it to be or not, but if you say “No offense, but you’re crowding me” it’s less offensive if I’m obviously trying to make a polite request than if I’m implying “and must be too fucking rude or stupid to realise.”
Just because it’s often used sarcastically or inappropriately, doesn’t mean it always is.
