I saw my nephew over Christmas (he’s three and a half) and it was a wonderful experience. Except I’ve realised that I’ve totally forgotten how to play with children. Improvising at his level, trying to work in a bit of learning, and helping him have a good time was hard. So what do I need to do?
PS I gave him a large (31") model aircraft carrier with die-cast model aircraft and helicopters and it was the stand-out winner of all his Christmas presents, so I got something right!
Most kids loved to be chased. Perferably with a giant furry claw like the ones at football games. All my friends have young kids, so I get to play with them alot. The point to remember though is to always let them get away or outrun you.
Squirt gun battles are fun, too. Hand everyone a loaded watergun and run around squirting each other under tables. Adult perk: when the kids gang up on you, totally cheat and pull out a superbig-mega squirt gun cannon and soak the kids. Everybody wins!
And fart/poop/pee-pee jokes are universally popular with the 3-6 year old crowd. Especially if you take pains to act like you’re doing it behind their parents’ backs.
Feigning surprise or outrage is a hit too (“hey!” “hey, what are you doing?! Nooo!!”).
Getting yourself physically down to their level is important too (i think). Building forts that only they fit into and squeezing into it is like visiting them in their own world. Kids are fun and you can pretty much take their lead.
Games are great with kids that are shy/reserved. They fill up the awkward silences and give you something to do. War is good, and the sheer randomness of it means that there is no compeition/equal chance of winning.
For shy kids who are too young for games, parallel play works well: coloring together, dressing and undressing barbies while sitting next together, even looking through (seperate) picture books together. They will open up when they are ready, and even if they never do, they’ve likely enjoyed the company.
Don’t talk down to them. Too many adults (and as far as I’m concerned one is too many) use a really stupid sing songy voice with kids that is really annoying, both for bystanders and the kids themselves.
Don’t worry about working in an educational aspect. Just enjoying life is as valuable as learning new facts/skills.
Piggyback rides are fun; playing horsie; singing and making sounds to “Beans the musical fruit”; holding the kid above your head and playing airplane, etc. Pretty much anything that would make mom/aunts say “Be Careful!!!” is a ton of fun.
If you insist on teaching something, Go Fish is fun and teaches matching and numbers.
Pretend play is really big for kids that age, you can get any two things and make them “talk” to each other and the kid will totally get into it. It doesn’t even have to have a face - a toothbrush could talk to a hairbrush. As long as you “believe” in the conversation and make it something the kid can understand I guarantee he will become involved in the game.
The most important thing is to relax and not worry about doing everything “right”.
Kids will trust you and be friends with you if you can form the rather simple habit of dealing honestly with them. They are easy to fool in the short term, but impossible to fool long-term.
Exactly. My co-worker has a three-year old, and one day the department went to lunch and his wife joined us with the kidlets. I sat across from a very well-behaved little boy who was coloring. I’d hold up the crayons and play dumb. I’d hold up a green crayon and say “This is an orange crayon.” He’d give me a funny look and shake his head and correct me, at which I’d slap my forehead and do it again with another color. I think it’s important, not only to reinforce colors (or shapes or numbers or whatever) but it teaches children that if they know they’re right, it’s okay to stand up for themselves. Of course, things got a little sticky when he realized (after I mentioned it) that there was no blue crayon, but then his macaroni and cheese arrived and he was distracted.
You just gotta find your inner kid, Quartz. You know he’s got to be in you somewhere.
The other day I was at the mall with my kid. We had to walk through the ladies underwear department. I immediately pretended to close my eyes and act like I was all embarrassed. The kid thought I was a nut job but it gave him quite the chuckle.
Once the kid has worn you out physically and whooped your ass at Candyland, ask him to show you his favorite books and read a few of them together. You’ll be surprised how much fun this is.