If you had telekinetic powers, what would you do with them?
Let’s assume:
[ul]
[li]Your power to move things with your mind was on par with your physical strength. So you can’t lift a house, but, if you strain, you could roll a car that was in neutral.[/li][li]You needed to be within a certain distance of an object to affect it. So, you can’t move something on TV, for example.[/li][/ul]
My question is, to what end would you apply your ability?
Cell phones would have a tendancy to be hurled in the direction of the movie screen when I’m around…
Parents with small children at late movies would find themselves floating towards the door…
Unattended grocery carts would miraculously not be in the middle of the aisle…
My favorite sports teams would make a lot more spectacular plays when I’m at the game…
Women’s blouse buttons would have a very difficult time remaining buttoned…
All worthy activities, I’m sure. 
But, would you use your power to change your life in a more significant way? Perhaps a more permanent way?
Would you head to the roulette wheel?
I can think of a terrorist I’d like to make “drink from the Sea of Gaza” to use his own words.
Zev Steinhardt
To prolong my bad mood today, I would kill people’s children when they aren’t paying attention by bashing their brains in with bricks. I would hide in a shadow somewhere and steal wallets and purses and then give the credit cards to homeless people and thugs to charge up to their hearts content. I would hunt down Jerry Falwell and see if one of those big cinder blocks would fit straight up his ass. If it didn’t it would not matter as I would then smash his face in with it. I would then run off into the sunset after joining Charlie’s Angels as a mid-season replacement for Farrah Fawcett.
HUGS!
Sqrl
PS. I am in a bad mood today. In no way would I do any of those things since I am a pacifist. Yeah, not even the Charlie’s Angels thing.
I’d join the Yankees as their new staff ace. There isn’t any rule against a telekenesis ball.
[John Sterling voice]
OK, Steinhardt winds, and the pitch. Ramirez hits it, but… what’s this? The ball is hanging in mid air! Now it’s floating over to Steinhardt’s glove! It lands in his glove. Inning over! Game over! The Yankees win! The-e-e-e- Yankees win!!
[/John Sterling voice]
Zev Steinhardt
I use my telepathetic powers to predict stupid things I’m about to do.
It usually doesn’t work though . . .
Tripler
One link short on the food chain.
Wow, the possibilities are endless.
Playing craps for a living.
Free stuff forever from vending machines.
Endless enjoyment annoying strangers on public transportation.
Screwing with the outcomes of football games.
And of course, woman wearing skirts and dresses would find a lot more sudden wind gusts.
can I get a ticket to the Lotto drawing?
hmmmm - so I wouldn’t have to lift a finger to get the household chores done? That’s good…
And I could walk my dalmatian without getting my arm yanked out of its socket? Even better…
Always being able to scrub my own back? Could life get any more exciting??
Geez - never realized I was so boring…
First place I’d go. I would have a truly remarkable string of lucky bets.
Cheating? Yes. Could I resist the temptation? I don’t think so.
But you’d still have to do the chore, just in your head instead. And you’d have to concentrate more on the task, instead of, say, watching TV at the same time.
I’d generally bring things to me that I need, instead of getting up to go get them. (Forget bringing the remote, though; I’d just change the channels at the source.) I’d turn the pages of books so that my hands could be free. I’d open the damn back door to let the dogs out for the 400th time without going down there. Answer the phone (depress the “speakerphone” button telekinetically), catch things as they are falling if I’m not close enough to do it manually, turn lights on and off, etc. I’d also work really hard at improving my strength, so that I could levitate myself.
Also, it’d be really cool to scare the bejeezus out of people.
oooo! Can I use that one too??
No more buying batteries for the remote . . .
Your vibrator is a remote?
…but if you win Lotto or roulette, you can HIRE someone to scrub your back… picture who you want…
This is interesting!
I expected more… uh… exciting responses. I mean, wouldn’t a telekinetic pitcher be a real success? I can hear the play by play:
“No one seems able to explain that dip in sdimbert’s curveball, Bob.”
