I’m interested in stories where you may have had a life changing decision and you knew going into it that it could go either really, really bad or great life changing good! I’m looking one of those decisions in the face now and would like to hear others’ experiences.
To give an idea of what I’m looking for, I’m considering moving across the country and starting a new job (in the same career I am currently) without a whole lot of cushion.
One intriguing system I’ve heard of is the 10-10-10 system. When considering something, what will the be consequences 10 minutes from now, 10 months from now, 10 years from now? There’s a book written about it, by Suzy Welch.
I was living in Boulder, CO, going back to school and not really liking the program (music ed). I really liked living in Boulder, pretty laid back lifestyle I enjoyed, lots of friends, very comfortable, no real reason to move. I was sitting beside a creek enjoying a cigarette and realized I could be sitting beside this creek in 20 years wondering where the hell my life went if I don’t get off my ass and do something.
Not that I don’t wonder where the hell my life went 20 years hence, but anyway I cut the cord, packed up my little pick-up truck, headed east, and moved in with my sister in NYC, took music classes, got a real job, met my wife-to-be, got my own place, married, kids, and so on…
The original idea was to stay with sis for a few months while working temp jobs and taking music courses, then move back to Boulder and look up some people I did gigs with and take it from there. Living in NYC for any length of time seemed inconceivable. Why would I want to do that?
But the strangest of things happened. I got a job that I found interesting, challenging, paid pretty well, had great benefits, and had great people to work with. I met my wife there, after all. At the same time I was entering my late 20s and my till-then overarching desire to do nothing but play music began to wither in the face of a steady fat paycheck and regular sex :). I kept playing, and continue to do so, but my young man’s burning desire to do nothing but play, play, play and the accompanying work ethic it required had pretty much got up and left.
Since I did have a cushion it wasn’t like what you are contemplating but it certainly turned out to be a life-changing move. I never did go back to Boulder, except to visit a couple of times.
Heh, maybe it’s a Boulder thing.
When I was 21 years old, living back in my hometown after being away at school for several years, a friend and I decided we needed to get the heck out of here and so we quit our jobs, packed our cars, and headed west. The idea was to go until we found a place we liked.
We got to Boulder, spent a few nights there and decided this was THE PLACE. So we started looking for an apartment. Did I mention we were camping? Ever try to find an apartment during late August in a university town when you don’t have a phone number for callbacks (this was the early 90s, before everyone and their dog had cell phones)? It was impossible.
After several days of this, we decided to give up on Boulder and head on farther west. We went out to a bar that night, and ended up meeting two girls, one of whom had a roommate who just moved out. She needed someone to move in for about 6 weeks before her lease was up. We took it.
It was great - Boulder’s a wonderful town when you’re 21 years old. We both got jobs, and eventually found our own apartment.
Eleven years later, I had the opposite problem. Suddenly I was in my early 30s, nice houses in Boulder were starting at $400K, Colorado’s front range was so populated it was starting to feel like California, and I longed for my hometown. I was dating a guy who had just lost a parent and gone through a messy divorce. He’d visited my hometown with me a couple times, and said “What if we just left here and moved to da UP?”
His job was easily movable, but mine wasn’t, and high tech jobs in small towns in the midwest are few and far between. We decided happiness > money, and took the plunge and moved back here.
The first few years were up & down as he got used to living practically in a foreign country and I struggled to find work. But we figured those things out, and now we’re giddy happy. I know we wouldn’t have been so happy if we’d stayed where we were.
The first part of my big change was detailed here on the boards, actually.
It worked out so well for me. There’ve been some serious ups and downs, but I got into a PhD program, and just finished my first year. I have managed to further my goals to within striking distance. I’m happier than I have ever been.
There were some scary times in there - I never did find a job that I posted about in that thread (aside from a 1 month stint at a horrid job), and my housing disappeared semi-suddenly after six months.
But I wouldn’t trade any of it for anything.
I joined the Peace Corps, moved to Africa, and became a teacher. Then I did it again in China! It’s been awesome. Change is good.