Tell me about your experiences traveling solo

In My Humble Opinion
1

A bit of background: this December I’ll be going to Hawaii for a two day observing run with a collaborator. He’s been there multiple times and so has no interest in staying longer to sight-see. Meanwhile, I’ve never been to Hawaii and this seems like an awesome travel opportunity. I’m asking friends if they’d like to come out for a week after the observing run, but seeing as we are all poor grad students I’m not expecting much of a response.

So, I’m probably going to be traveling alone and I don’t like the idea much. I’ve never done it before and it sounds lonely. I hear some people love it though and I’d like to hear from them. What works, what doesn’t, what makes it fun? Any advice?

2

Personally, while I don’t consider myself a loner and enjoy very much the company of others, traveling is one of those things I tend to prefer to do alone or with one other person who meshes with my traveling style.

Traveling alone is great, at least for me, because I am not beholden to anyone else’s schedule, and I can indulge any and every whim I have. I don’t like making hard plans when traveling, preferring just to go out into the wild and see where the day takes me. It’s complete freedom, and completely fun if you’re into that sort of thing. I can see how some people wouldn’t like it, though.

I’m not sure what kind of specific advice you’re looking for, though. What I generally do when exploring alone is take a backpack, a camera, a notebook, and go walking around, trying out the local food, taking in the scenery, visiting any museums or other attractions I might find interesting and, of course, hitting several local pubs along the way, chatting with the locals, and just keeping the day completely open-ended.

3

I recently traveled to Curacao alone and to St. Maarten alone, both on business. Both trips were very lonely and I never got to leave the hotel to do anything fun. However, I did not include extra days in my trip to specifically go have fun, either.

4

Traveled solo a lot.
Since I like to read there will be a good book or two (One for over, one for back).

Check the net for local events. Ask a travel agent if there’s something you might like scheduled for the stay. If it’s your first visit, take the touristy tour. You might see something you’ll want to return to.

5

It doesn’t have to be advice. I want to know what works for you and what makes it fun for you. I imagine that’s pretty personality dependent, but maybe someone is going to have a take on it that appeals to me.

Ideally I’d like to be traveling with one or two friends so I can share my experiences, but I also need downtime and that’s harder to get in a group.

6

Here’s the thing about traveling alone. Most travelers come in pairs. Most seating, buses, trains, planes come in pairs as well. When you travel as a single you will automatically end up beside another single. If you’re not looking to hook up, just want a companion, this can work in your favour. They are in the same boat as you. You’ll both be facing the same challenges, so there will be something to talk about. Maybe you end up sharing a cab from the airport, why take two? Maybe they know a great deal on a hotel and you haven’t picked one yet, or have a tip on a great restaurant, etc. Of course, there is always the chance you’ll end up next to a religious zealot of some such, but that hasn’t been my experience. All positive, not life long friends but someone to sight see with, share a meal, etc.

I say be bold, dare it!

7

I voluntarily travel solo alone all the time and love it. I even did a week to Hawai’i alone (from U.S. mainland) a few years ago and saw far more than I could have seen if I was traveling with anyone else, unless that other person was as gung ho about seeing lots and lots as I was.

I suppose if you’re either afraid to be alone or an extrovert it might not be the most optimal…although in those cases traveling alone gives extroverts more opportunities to meet people and extroverts traveling alone always do seem to be hooking up with other people to do stuff, if just for a day. Me personally, that’s not so much my thing…I’m introverted and happy to see what I want to see and do what I want without too much interaction with anyone else.

8

I love being on my own schedule when I’m traveling. Get up when I want, go where I want at my own pace. And you’re free to either socialize with others or keep to yourself, depending on the mood. I prefer being on my own far more than traveling with most people. I only have a few friends that I would rather be with than be on my own.

9

I adore travelling alone, and generally prefer it.

Advantages to solo travel:
[ol]
[li]You can spend all the time in museums and attractions as you like and you can linger on the stuff you find fascinating as long as you like. I could spend hours at art museums that most people would rather rush through.[/li][li]You can take walks without justifying where you are going or feeling bad if you get lost. I’m big on exploring, and exploring is best when you don’t need to live up to someone else’s expectations.[/li][li]You can visit places nobody else would be really interested in, or that others would say they don’t have the time or money to visit. [/li][li]You can eat whatever you want, whenever you want, and stick to whatever price range you like. If you want to eat two lunches, do it! If you want to splurge, go for it! If you are lazy and just want the hotel buffet, that’s cool, too. Heck, if all you really want is a McDonalds hamburger, nobody is going to complain. [/li][li]You can go back and revisit stuff that you really liked. Enjoyed a particular tour? WHy not do it again tomorrow?[/li][li]You can feel free to take a relaxing day to just read or hang around the hotel room or beach without feeling like you are wasting someone’s precious vacation time. [/li][li] Most importantly, you have the chance to meet more people- both travelers and locals. When you are with others, you tend to focus on each other and filter your experiences through each other. When you are solo, you often find yourself willing to talk to new people and make new friends. [/li][li]Sleep in? Stay out late? Wake up to see the sunrise? Your choice![/li][/ol]

It IS lonely at times. Life is occasionally lonely. Nobody signed you up for an existence entirely free of loneliness. But I think you’ll find the loneliness you find when traveling is that sort of romantic, soul-stirring and exciting loneliness that makes you look at the world in a new way. It’s a big expansive loneliness that fills you up. It’s the stuff of poetry. Travel is, in a way, a method of stepping out of your life for a bit and into the realm of pure experience. Travelling solo gets you even closer to that.

There are a few things you can do to take the edge off of being alone so much. A good book or two is a must, of course, especially to read during meals. I find travelling with books about the place I’m in give a deeper sense of appreciation for where I am- and there are some great books about Hawaii. I also like to travel with a puzzle book of some kind for when I want something more active.

I like to take plenty of pictures, since it gives me a good reason to explore and can give an additional sense of purpose to my outings. I like to write a blog when I travel, so as I’m enjoying the sights I mentally compose what I’m going to write in my head. That does a lot to take care of the desire to share your experiences. I’m not a huge artist, but lots of people like to keep a sketchbook with them to capture local color. I also use my time alone to plan stuff…just go on those little flights of fancy you don’t get to think about in your busy daily life. If you ran a theme park, what rides would be in it? If you ran a restaurant, what food would you serve? I always keep some paper on me for my ideas.

If you are a poor grad student, you are probably still in the demographic that enjoys hostels. I’d research one and stay there rather than a lonely hotel- try hostelworld.com. They have tons in Hawaii, and it’s cheap. I cannot stress this enough- stay in a hostel. Stay in a hostel. Hotels suck. Stay in a hostel. You can get a private room if you need one, but look for a hostel with good common spaces.

You will meet plenty of other solo travelers from around the world in hostels. Generally they’ll have a fun bar to hang out in, where it’s perfectly normal just to hang out and talk to strangers…there will probably be books, maybe board games, maybe a pool table or something. There should also be a lounge/TV room/restaurant/breakfast room/deck where you may meet up with people who want to go out with you for the day or night. It’s pretty common to hook up with groups of travelers headed the same way as you and do bits of your trip together.

If you are single, hostels are also full of lonely travelers looking for a little romance to their trip, as well!

If you want an even more local experience, maybe check out couchsurfers.

Enjoy your time in HI. I took a look at Hostelworld, and it looks like there are some really fun hostels. You’ll have a blast. The beach is a great place to travel solo, because it’s so easy to find great places to kick back and relax without any pressures at all.

10

I traveled with some friends to Northern California, but they ended up leaving a day before me. They also stayed with some friends and I stayed in a hotel, alone.

The hotel part was awesome. I was sort of on vacation by myself until about 11am in the mornings and after 9pm in the evenings. I just did whatever, and had a lot of naked time :slight_smile:

On the day I was actually alone, I scheduled myself a 5-hour bus tour of San Francisco. I didn’t get seated with someone else but the only other solo travelers - an Aussie 20-something and a middle-aged American woman - and I found each other pretty quickly. We helped each other out by making sure we were accounted for when the bus left each stop, and also took pictures of each other. This was a real boon - now I have pictures of myself in front of SF landmarks.

Me and the Aussie girl ended up hanging out a bit after the tour (I’m a girl too, nothing exciting happened sorry) and I drove her around in my rental car. We friended each other on Facebook and I got to “follow” her on her adventure east across America.

I travel alone a lot from Ohio to NC to visit friends. I do the 8+ hour drive alone and then stay with a friend. She works so I do my own stuff during the day and it’s blissful. A real vacation!

I think your deal will be great - going along with someone else will help you get your bearings and by the time the other person leaves you will feel fine about doing a few days on your own. It’s much less scary than just going on your own the whole time.

11

My experience was a bit different - went to Europe alone.
However, “alone” is a relative term. I met lots of people on my travels. Sometimes we would just have a chat, sometimes we were going to the same location, sometimes we even traveled together for a few days and several times, we became great friends and have remained in contact since.

I met two girls from New Zealand on one trip, and we arranged to meet again a few weeks later. We did and hung out awhile, but introduced them to others I had met. One of the women from NZ left and the other hung out for awhile. Months later, she came to visit me in Berlin (where I had since moved) and I introduced her to another guy I had met on my travels. Today, the two of them are married, have kids and grandkids and, well - all because we had one thing in common - love of travel an open to meeting new people.

So - for me, going solo is fantastic - you can be with people when you want or you can just pick up and go whenever you wish.

12

I enjoy both traveling alone and with friends. They both have pluses and minuses. The thing about traveling alone is that it rarely ends up really being alone - you meet people along the way. That’s one really cool thing about traveling by yourself that doesn’t happen as much when you’re with friends. If you’re with friends, you tend to hang out in the group and may shut yourself off - even if it’s not on purpose - to the possibility of meeting new people.

Also, no having to compromise with people over what to do! Last time I traveled with friends, we had a very nice time, but there was definitely some haggling over what to do and how long we should do it. There is something to be said for just being able to do what you want to do and not having to compromise with a grumpy friend who’s tired/bored/wants to do something else.

I would definitely stay in a hostel. You don’t meet people in hotels, but hostels are set up for socializing.

13

I like traveling alone from time to time; I’ve visited New York, D.C. and London by myself. I really appreciate the fact that there’s no pressure on me to entertain someone else. Plus, I like walking everywhere and I only have my own tired feet to worry about.

If you feel lonely, you can always take a group tour. There are tons of those.

14

What is an “observing run,” and what island will you be on?

I have had good times in Hawaii when traveling alone. This year I had one day to myself, and I got up early, played golf, found a new place with great pizza for lunch, and then got a surfing lesson in the afternoon. Chatted with the other people in my foursome during the golf, and had fun with a father and a couple sons when surfing.

With a little bit of thought, you can probably guess the activities where you’re more likely to chat with people (e.g., a tour that takes a hike to some waterfall) versus the ones where you may be a third wheel (e.g., the romantic sunset dinner cruise).

15

I have traveled quite a few times by myself, both on business in the US and for leisure overseas. My friends call me “brave” for going overseas by myself, but I don’t think there’s any bravery involved - just a determination to see other places, and a lack of friends that have the time, money, or inclination to do the same.

Yes, it can be lonely, and I’ve felt very isolated in a few places where I’ve been surrounded by people that speak another language that I don’t understand, but I think the freedom it gives you makes it well worth it. You’re free to make your own schedule, see or don’t see whatever you want, and to do nothing at all, if that’s what you want to do.

Traveling solo has also given me a good deal of satisfaction to know that I can take care of myself. If I go with someone else I tend to step back and let them take charge, but on my own I know that no one else is going to help me out. It’s somewhat empowering to know that I am capable of creating an itinerary and then be able to manage the unexpected things that come up.

I find that I take tons more photos when I travel alone, I think because I want to share what I’m seeing with others. It’s nice to have someone with you that you can share it with, but my photos and stories make it possible to still share the experience, just at a later date.

For me, the worst part is eating alone. I will usually get take-out or something from a grocery store for a couple of meals a day, and I make sure I have a book to read or a journal to write in when I’m sitting in a restaurant. I’m pretty introverted, so I don’t tend to make friends when I’m traveling, and that doesn’t bother me, but I do tend to feel pretty self-conscious sitting at my table for one.

I spent years wishing that I could travel, waiting for someone to come along and invite me on a trip. I finally realized that wasn’t going to happen, and if I wanted to see other places I’d better get off my butt and do it for myself. I’ve had some wonderful trips over the past five or six years, some by myself and some with others, and I’m so glad that I took the initiative to do it.

By the way, I visited Hawaii with my husband last year, the first time I had actually traveled with him other than our trips to the beach. If I ever go again, I think I’ll leave him at home. I would have had more fun by myself.

16

Best trip I ever went on was a six-week trip around the country by car. A friend had been going to go with me, and backed out with just a couple days to go, so I was faced with a quick decision of whether travel anyway, or cancel.

I went ahead with the trip, and have a ton of wonderful memories as a result. Hiked most of the way down into the Grand Canyon from the North Rim, saw the giant redwoods and sequoias and the rain forest of the Olympic Peninsula, and was briefly surrounded by a flock of bighorn sheep on the Highline Trail in Glacier National Park as they grazed their way through the area where I was standing.

So by all means, stay an extra week on your own. Which island will you be on? Get the “____ Revealed” guide for that island; they’ve got guides for Oahu, Maui, the Big Island, and Kauai. Maui Revealed is $12.89 at Amazon; the other three are $11.53. Been to Maui twice, and Maui Revealed was wonderfully helpful.

17

This! You can do whatever you want, whenever you want. Whatever whim strikes your fancy. I had some awesome trips this way!
“Strikes your fancy”??? Jeebus, I sound like my grandma!

18

I’m traveling by myself to Washington for Jon Stewart’s rally, and I expect to have a pretty fun day even if I don’t ever meet up with the other Dopers. Whenever I’ve been in DC it was with other people who were calling the shots on the itinerary, and now I have a chance to plan my own itinerary and take in the attractions at my own pace.

19

My partner travels all the time on business, so when he gets a vacation, he’d rather just stay home. Even going to some place he’s never been to, it just isn’t a great experience for him. And frankly, I love traveling alone anyway. I’m a “serious amateur” photographer, so when I travel the focus is on things to photograph. This means that if someone’s with me, they have to shlep around with me and wait while I get good shots.

Hawaii is a great place for first-time single travelers, because there’s no language problem. I’ve traveled solo to many non-English-speaking places, but for the first time I’d stick with English. In fact my first solo trip was to Hawaii, for the 1991 solar eclipse. I wound up staying 3 weeks, and had a great time. I only visited Maui and the Big Island, renting a car on both islands, and enjoyed the freedom of going wherever I wanted to.

On the other hand, if you really don’t enjoy being alone, Hawaii can be a lonely place for a single person. You’ll be surrounded by a lot of honeymoon couples, reminding you that you’re alone. That wasn’t a problem for me, but it might be for you.

20

I’m an astronomer. I’m taking data at the observatory on Mauna Kea. I think I’ll be spending most of my time on the big island.