I don’t consider myself a loner: I have a few close friends (and lots of second tier friends) who I love spending time with- but whenever I travel with one of them, I usually end up wishing I had just gone alone. (Kind of in that situation right now, actually.)
It’s not really anything personal even, but I just love the liberty of being at my own pace: if I want to spend 4 hours in The National Turnip Museum and bypass the traveling exhibit of the Mona Lisa altogether then I can do that, and likewise if I want to try the ‘Southern Fried Lobster Nuggets’ place for lunch and the bistro in Little Uganda for dinner or if I’m not hungry and don’t want to eat at all, I don’t have to worry about anybody else’s preferences or schedules or end up being irritated when we go to the Pierre McIsrael’s Scottish-Kosher-French Canadian fusion place that’s as absolutely awful as you expected it to be when you gave in. If it’s a road trip and I want to push on for an extra 200 miles or take a 200 mile detour to see a ditch at a crossroads that has some genealogical significance to me, that too is an option.
Is anybody else like this? Does anybody else like an occasional solitary vacation by choice?
You’re a woman? I ask cause I think it’s more common for women to vacation together than guys. I’ve gone on trips with guys - but usually for business - or only a single destination - so it wasn’t that much of an issue. With a girlfriend - well it is usually more involved.
But back to your question - I certainly have gone on trips by myself, but usually they were at least tangentially related to some business thing (would go to a conference for a day or two), but vacation for the other five. I certainly like to do things at my own pace - and there is something to be said for not having to compromise. I think it’s totally normal to feel the way you do.
We had a thread on this not too long ago. I strongly prefer traveling alone. It gives you more freedom, and I find it makes me more likely to meet local people and get off the beaten track. My personal theory is that for every other person you travel with, you basically lose about 10% of your trip.
Hate it. In fact, we just invited 4 other couples to join us in St. Maarten to celebrate our anniversary. The more the merrier. We can do couples things or have a day spent doing things with just the girls/ guys.
I’ve done it before. It’s grand, not sure I’d go away for a long holiday on my own but a few days in a new city etc. is always fun, relaxing on my own.
I think if I could travel with someone who shared all my interests and energy, this would be ideal. It’s fun being able to do the whole “remember when” bit with someone else. And plus, people can push you out of your comfort zone and make you try new things. Travel is all about new things.
But what is even better is being able to make decisions freely, without compromising or having to explain yourself. I always feel awesomely powerful and grown-up when I solo-travel. If you can’t do what you want to do when you’re on vacation, you ain’t on vacation.
[Raises hand] Oh Hell Yes. I take several trips a year by myself*. I really prefer to operate solo. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve modified a lot of my habits to accommodate a solo act.
I’ve grown weary of sherpa duties for the females, and tired of the “terrible toos” that seem to be the background chorus of every vacation I plan. (too hot/cold, wet/dry, windy/calm, noisy/quiet, expensive/cheap etc. etc. etc.)
After decades of taking the family to Disney/Destin/Miami/Keys/Yellowstone/Tetons/Monument-Valley/Corpus/Padre/Grand-Canyon/Arches/Telluride/Durango/HotSprings/SanAntonio/SeaWorld/LosAngeles/SanDiego/Vancouver/Carlsbad/JacksonHole/Jamaica/Bahamas/Tortugas; I finally got tired of the bitching, said “screw it” and retired from family vacations. I have a big boat, an RV, a few thousand leased acres for my own private offroading/hunting, and a friend who lets me borrow his plane whenever I want. There’s no need to take anyone but my dog.
*disclaimer: I can usually be talked into one camping trip with the family in the summer. But that’s it.
Gosh, yes, love it. I mean, other people can be good too, but there’s always a lot more anxiety involved if you have to worry about whether the other person is having fun, and with some people it takes forever to get out of the door in the morning.
I am sort of the reverse - I like vacationing with mrAru, but I liked it when he was in the Navy and would vanish periodically for anywhere from a week to 6 months.
We tend to like pretty much the same things - I have no problem with trying different restaurants - not sure what Little Uganda would have but it is probably similar to the Ethiopian food - a starchy base food, augmented by dollops of something fairly intensely flavored [or in other words basic common peasant food] and different spice and fruit/veg combinations that basic American food uses. [I did find out that I really like teff as a porridge for breakfast. Nice flavor. The flatbread injira is very tasty as well.] And one road trip I hung out in the hotel room in the hot tub and he hit some casino [we were in Reno, dinner was fine but I really don’t gamble and he wanted to hit the slots or something.]
Now staying home alone is great, I can have food around he doesn’t like much, keep to my own schedule [I am convinced that I evolved somewhere that the day is about 26 hours long, I precess around the clock if left to my own devices.] and can hog the remote. I got really lazy one 30 day ORSE and did homemade ‘tv dinners’ 2 meals a day <I did that cook for the month and freeze it deal that was popular about 15 years ago>
Someday, somehow, I’ll get to try it and I’ll let you know (my guess is I’ll love it).
This is one of the things that just has not Been Done in my family. I don’t think there’s a way for me to suggest going off on my own for a vacation without a wagonload of hurt feelings.
I’m so glad that my partner travels so much for business; that way I get to vacation alone, and he’s either traveling somewhere else or happy to stay home alone. When I travel, the important thing is my photography, and it really gets hampered by someone waiting impatiently for me to get the right shot.
That being said . . . once in a while my partner will join me for part of a trip, especially for a few days in Paris. I truly love that.
I ride with a club, we always have a good time wherever we go. Sometimes I stay with the club, sometimes I ride off to have alone time.
My SO and I have only made one car trip together so far, and it was fun. Our next vacation will be next month. We are flying out of country, but we do have lots of relaxing time scheduled. I’m quite sure that some of that relaxing time will be alone or exploring time, because we are so well suited.
So, all that being said…I like vacationing with other people as long as I have some control about my schedule.
I like to get away for a break on my own. Do what I want, when I want, how I want to whomever will let me.
There’s something so special and relaxing about not having to plan anything or gt anyone else s agreement, just being able to do whatever on a whim just because you can.
Depends on what I’m planning for vacation. If it’s sight-seeing/tourism/cultural immersion, I prefer to be by myself, for many of the reasons others have listed here. Vacations of these types that I’ve taken with others typically turn into disasters (my last trip to NYC with a girlfriend ended with me breaking up with her in the middle of Central Park). Even non-disastrous vacations are less enjoyable.
For rest/relaxation or road trips, I like having friends or a partner along. Somehow a romantic getaway to a B&B is less fun when alone, or having a passenger who can act as navigator.
The one and only time I wished I had someone with me was when my wallet was stolen after arriving in the Madrid airport. With no ID or credit cards, I had to cancel my 3-week trip and return home (which took 4 days). Someone with his own credit cards would have saved the trip.
