Tell me about your experiences with ADD

In My Humble Opinion
21

I had a kid diagnosed with ADD at age 13. There was some testing involved and a couple of long talks with his pediatrician who was, on the whole, pretty conservative about drugging kids. However, the doc suggested a trial of Ritalin, and gave me a sample. He also suggested some other coping strategies, which sounded to me like the things you’d urge anyone to do. (Break things down into manageable pieces, set deadlines–that kind of thing.) He also encouraged a healthy diet with lots of vegetables and not much sugar (big surprise).

The pediatrician said that if Ritalin was the right choice for my son he would know it instantly, with the first dose, and if it didn’t work, if it made him shaky or nervous or caused loss of appetite, then it was not the right drug.

My son thought about it and decided he didn’t want to be drugged and would rather not take the Ritalin, so he didn’t–he didn’t take it even once–and he continued to do badly in school with the exception of maybe one class per semester, in which he performed like a genius. (Rarely the same class in successive semesters.)

Since he wasn’t taking the trial sample of Ritalin, I did. Worked so well for me that I got a prescription. (It was not like the Desperate Housewives thing where she worked like a deranged beaver for days on end, although I guess it could have been. I took it in the morning, had a normal, very efficient day, and by the end of the day it had worn off, I was tired, and I slept and ate normally. Not very well, but that was normal without the drug, too.)

The pediatrician did say that he did not recommend the generic version of Ritalin, and gave some reasons. Apparently people noticed many more side effects and much less smooth delivery.

What I found was that my brain on drugs was actually better. I no longer take it because I changed insurance, changed doctors, and my new doctor considers Ritalin a street drug and won’t prescribe it. It’s not that I can’t function without it, it’s just that it’s easier with it. Things that seem like huge barriers to my undrugged mind melt away, the barriers do not exist, and things I find impossible, or at least very hard when not drugged, seem effortless.

22

You quoted my post, so I’m assuming you were addressing it directly. I should point out again that these were the conclusions I came to AFTER I was diagnosed, got medication (which was about 75-85% of why I’m better now), went through therapy (another 10-20%) and learned coping strategies on my own (the other 5% or so), and was just going through things in my head that would make things easier, assuming all this HAD happened much earlier.

Oh yes, I agree with you 100%. However, despire all of that, criticisms are MAJOR (to you, at the time) when you are a ‘normal’ teenager – for me at least, having ADD, they just had so much more of a profound impact of how I saw myself/how I thought of myself as a person (because I WAS trying really hard), I want to do what I can to prevent another kid from going through that.

As previously mention, I admit a some of it WAS normal teenaged laziness/rebelliousness – but a LOT of it wasn’t (in fact, I think I wanted to be lazy/rebellious much less than the average teen because of my issues), and after getting diagnosed I think I’m better at figuring out what was what.

23

The one piece advice I can give is to keep a sense of humour. Some of the things my son has done and still does cracks me up.

Thirsty, Check
Get up, Check
Get Glass, Check
Open fridge, Check
Grab pop, Check
Pour pop in glass, Check
Put pop back in fridge, Check
Walk back and sit down, Check
Glass full of pop still on the counter, Priceless!

I used to watch him do it and then grab the glass and Thank him for pouring me a cold beverage. There were times that he never even got past the “get glass” or the 2-liter was left on the counter and not put back but when that happened he at least remembered the glass of pop.

He has burnt his fingers many times because he was in another land and was not thinking about the hot pan. He has banged his head on cupbaord doors more times that I can count. He would open the door turn around turn back and bang his head. I just told him not to do that because it hurts.

And that was when he was on medication.

When he got about 16/17 he no longer took it. He forgot to take it so often by that time anyway it really was no longer effective.

He drinks a lot of coffee at work and also loves those energy drinks.

He does not have a lot going on in his life right now so he deals okay. He is a slob though so he pays his friends sister to clean his room. I figure hey if that works for him then more power to him.

He will be twenty soon and does not burn his fingers or bang his head anymore.

Learn to laugh at some antics and concentrate on the important stuff.

24

More “building upon” it than addressing it directly. Your post reminded me how much work I had to do after my own diagnosis, and I wanted to make the point that while the meds alone often make a HUGE difference, those of us who are diagnosed late have had a lot of time to build our own “systems” for coping. Once the brain chemistry is more normalized, we still have to deal with the other aspects of the condition. It’s that kind of “if you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you always got” thing. The meds can work REALLY dramatically, so it isn’t uncommon for people to expect them to fix every aspect of the ADD – and when something comes up that is a result of a bad coping strategy rather than the chemistry, it is easy to get discouraged and think, hey, maybe I AM a bad (lazy, crazy, careless, thoughtless whatever) person, or the meds aren’t working right and I will just stop taking them.

I remember some earlier posts by the OP about her son, and I just wanted to put a heads-up out there: treating his ADD should make a huge difference, but try to remember that teenagers are well-known for general jerkitude and flakiness, and the only known cure for adolescence is turning 21 :slight_smile:

25

As a counterpoint to the people that have said that the ADD meds have helped with depression, I’d like to make a counterpoint, just so that you know that these meds aren’t all sunshine and unicorn giggles.

I was diagnosed in preschool, and yes, it was THAT bad. I’ve been on various medications since then, first Cylert, then Adderall, and now Concerta. I’m 20 now, and finishing out my sophomore year at a good college. Since high school, I’ve been fighting with depression, and let me tell you, when you come down off of the meds, you FEEL it. I feel like all of my life is worthless, I’m incapable of accomplishing anything, and that no matter what I do, I’m crap. It hits hard and fast, and can last from fifteen minutes to an hour. The rest of the day, I can be happy as a pig in mud, but once six or seven pm rolls around, I’m crap. Once it’s gone, I’m fine, but be warned, the meds do have serious side effects, and I would strongly discourage anyone from “just taking one” as some of the people in this thread have said they did.

Just a counterpoint.

26

To the OP: There is often a hereditary component to it; is there any chance that you or your spouse have ADD, or other family members?

You may want to read Driven To Distraction; written by a psychiatrist who has it himself and was diagnosed in early adulthood.

This condition is eminently treatable, but it can take some time to find the best medication for the person.

27

…I sent Hallboy off to school this morning with a breakfast that included Mountain Dew…

I feel like such a horrible mother. :wink: Last night, we were standing in the grocery store, attempting to decide which caffiene beverage to purchase. Nearly all his life, I’ve been very careful about all the Hallkids getting caffiene, but probably a bit more lax with Hallboy than the Hallgirls. He’s had limited Coke, Pepsi, Mountain Dew (no tea or coffee as he doesn’t like it). This morning, I said to him, “Drink a can of Mountain Dew before you go to school, but drink it with breakfast–some protein like an egg or peanut butter.” :eek:

I’m “making do” until we get to the pediatrician.

28

I’m the only common demoniator parent with the Hallgirls and Hallboy, and actually, from some of the research I’ve done, I probably have/had some of the same symptoms that they are experiencing, although I attributed MINE to upbringing in a small Catholic elementary school. :eek: I’ve also developed coping mechnisms over the years that have addressed ways for me to “focus”, but like so many here, it was trial and error. (One of mine is to use caffiene to “get into the zone” when I want to do something, like read for any length of time, or write, or even complete a project.)

29

It is funny how caffiene effects people differently.

I drink coffee in the morning. I am an absolute bear with out it but I can not really say I get a rush from it. I could drink coffee ten minutes before going to sleep if I wanted to.

My SO on the other hand gets all wigged out if he has one cup of coffee. Same with the Mountain Dew or Pepsi. A glass or a can of that he is up and running.

Then my son with ADD gets focused from a can of Monster.

30

…Mountain Dew did NOT go over well.

31

I am not ADD, but I do find that a shot of 5 Hour Energy drink will focus me. If I am having trouble concentrating it will really pull my thoughts together. It contains the only caffeine that I take. (It has a nice mix of B vitamins and since I have trouble absorbing the Bs I find it gives me a great energy boost too.)

32

So what happened?

Was he hyper? Sick? Did he fall asleep?

33

Oh, God, YES! This was me to a T.

I was diagnosed about 3 years ago, and I can’t believe the difference being on meds has made. In fact, we’re going to attempt to get pregnant with our second child in June, and I’m scared to go off of my Strattera (although, I’ll admit, my pregnancy hormones with my son actually HELPED my ADD - I was more organized when I was pregnant and when I was breastfeeding. When I stopped breastfeeding, everything went to hell again.).

I have goals. I’m actually rather frustrated in my job right now - I adore my company, but I know that I can be so much more than an administrative assistant and I’m making plans to go back to school. Luckily, my boss has realized this, and I’ll be receiving some new duties that relate to the degree I want to get (in IT), so I’ll be assisting one of our directors with training smaller companies in our fundraising database.

I can focus. Sometimes, I still hyper-focus, but I can focus on things I love and get them done. I’ve rediscovered a love of quilting, and although being a parent and a full-time employee kind of cuts into my time, I’m finding that I am actually on my way to FINISHING projects.

My office - I am uber-organized at work - which has, in part, led to the frustration about - I am so organized that I’ve been able to complete my work in a fraction of the time, so I spend much of my day surfing the web.

My house is still somewhat of a wreck, but it’s getting there - I actually do keep a much cleaner and neater house than I used to, but we have to sort through and throw out a lot of stuff, and there’s just not much time. However, I clean the places that need it on a consistent basis, like my kitchen, bathrooms, living room, dining room, etc. It’s more clutter than anything.

One major thing that the Strattera has helped has been impulse-buying for me. It was so easy just to buy something, even if I didn’t need it. And now, I can budget, I can plan, and if I want something, we make a plan for it. It sounds like such a small thing, but it’s huge.

My husband notices a huge difference when I forget to take my Strattera even once. Like I said, I’m a little nervous about going off of it in June, but hopefully, my pregnancy hormones will work like they did last time.

34

I have all the symptoms of adult ADD and went on a course of Strattera. As soon as I took it, the little monkey that was always jumping around my brain went away. It was a great feeling.

I stopped after about 4 months for 2 reasons - I had horrible insomnia. I’d lie awake for hours or go to sleep then wake up and be wide awake for hours.

I became too single minded and focused. If I intended to play one game of spider solitaire I’d find that 4 hours later I was still there playing spider solitaire with no idea that time had passed. It wasn’t helping me get more work done so there was no point.

On the plus side, the drugs allowed me to gain some control of my finances and I developed a system that I probably couldn’t have developed without drugs, but I can maintain.

35

Out of control behavior, impulsiveness (he’s NEVER impulsive), “I don’t know why I did it”, crying, etc. Wasn’t pretty. He was in a situation that was familiar, with people he’s been around for years, and the main (only?) different factor was the Mountain Dew.

I can’t wait until the appointment with the pediatrician.

36

This is a really good point. I’m not sure how I feel about being on Strattera long-term, but it has helped me develop a ton of coping mechanisms and organizational systems. That’s been invaluable. I’ve been seeing a therapist for several months now, too, and she’s helping me deal with my constant anxiety that I’ve had since I was a kid. I can’t stress the help of a good therapist enough.

I had issues with insomnia, too (I would wake up at 5 AM, and not be able to go back to sleep), but those have faded (it could also have something to do with the fact that I’m the mother of a toddler this second go-round on it, so sleep is precious).

Phall, I think it’s great that you’re getting your son the help he needs NOW instead of letting him discover it as an adult. It’s funny, I was actually rather ashamed to be diagnosed, but now that I’ve gotten myself in gear and organized and I feel like a productive person, it’s not embarrassing at all. My brain just works a little differently than some people.

37

I think in the beginning, I had a great fear of him being “labeled” with ADD, especially since there can be so much controversy surrounding it (does it exist? Medication or no medication? caused by sugar, bad parenting, poor nutrition? Etc.) However, the end result is that there is being creating a horrible paper trail in his wake regarding his inability to do his school work and get the grades I know he’s capable of getting! Not to mention what this all has done to his self esteem.

To hell with anyone who wants to label him–I’d rather have him labeled with ADD than “stupid, lazy” or have his self esteem destroyed.

38

BLESS you. The “label” of ADD ensures an IEP for your son in school, thus giving him a chance to catch up to himself. It will allow him access to the right tools - coping strategies, meds, whatever - to manage his behavior and actually reach his potential.

Teachers and other adults in school settings can make recommendations or suggestions, but we can’t DIAGNOSE kids. That said, when I was room-momming at my daughter’s elementary school years ago, there was a boy in her class who so obviously had the worst case of ADD, like, EVER. On the rare occasions I could get and hold his attention for more than a minute, he was an amazingly good-hearted, thoughtful, sweet kid. He was also a complete out-of-control maniac whose impulse control was non-existent. He couldn’t sit still, he couldn’t lower his voice, he couldn’t keep his temper reigned in. He was a source of constant aggravation and disruption and managing him took a good chunk of everyone’s classroom time. Eventually his parents were called to school for a meeting with the principal, who gently suggested that perhaps they might talk to his pediatrician and see about getting him tested for ADD. They refused, saying they didn’t want their son labeled. I remember at the time thinking, he’s ALREADY labeled: as a BRAT!

39

I am sorry to say you may get this from some teachers anyway.

When my son entered first grade they wanted him tested for hearing loss so I did. The doctor said he had some but it was in no way bad enough for hearing aids. The speech teacher kept insisting that his lack of attention was due to his hearing and not the ADHD. I took him back three times to get his hearing tested and I always got the same answer. “He has some loss but in no way is he in need of hearing aids”.

They ended up holding him back to repeat first grade. I again went through the same thing with the speech teacher. They suggested he wear a device that amplified sound. It was like a small box that hung on a chain around his neck and a set of ear phones and the teacher wore a small microphone. Everything she said was amplified to him. They tried it for about three months and said his school work improved. I again took him back but this time to a different doctor that she suggested. I got the same answer but when I told the doctor of my situation with Mrs. X the speech teacher he then recommended them.

I was pissed. I knew he really did not need them but the mention of Mrs. X suddenly marked them as needed. I found out later that the more special needs children in a department the more money the department got. When I tried to explain again that the doctor suggested he did not need them she brought up the point about the amplifier. I tried to explain about ADHD and that with the teachers instructions amplified that with ADHD it is almost like they are getting his attention every time she speaks. He can’t stay in la la land.

Needless to say I did not get them but from then on my son was labeled as having a hearing problem and not a child with ADHD that needed extra help. They also removed the amplifier as they could not continue to let him use it since he was not a special needs child.

My son did okay in school but he struggled. It made me so mad they would not do more for him. Since he had no learning disability nor special needs he got no extra help in school.

I remember the last teacher conference I had when he was still in public school. It was the last semester of sixth grade. They insisted he needed hearing aids and until we got them for him they would not place him in any special classes. Now they never asked me to get him tested again. They only went on the records from his speech teacher in first grade. They blamed every one of his issues on the fact that he was not hearing them and not that he had ADHD. One teacher even said “I know he hears me he is just not paying attention” WTF? You just said he was not hearing you. Not paying attention is ADHD!

It is like they knew he needed help but to get that help he had to be labeled as special needs and ADD or ADHD was not considered special needs.

I pulled him out after the end of that year and homeschooled him from then on.

He is almost 20 now so all this happened a while back. I can only hope that the school system has changed and they have more help for children with ADD and ADHD.

Even if times have changed you may run into some teachers that still don’t want to believe your kid has ADD, or any child has it for that matter, and just want to label him as a slacker. Work with the school as much as you can. Read up on the law and make sure they are following all the guidelines if you get any resistance.

40

One of my kids was “diagnosed” with ADD after I filled out a checklist and the doctor (not my regular doctor) talked to her for 5 minutes. He then proceeded to tell me that he thinks I have ADD also. His basis? Because of a few conversations we’ve had over the years.

Actually, I just don’t like him. Our conversations are stilted, tense, and uncomfortable. Also I don’t like to look him in the face while we’re talking.

I declined him writing an insta-prescription that day. I went back to our regular doc and she said Oh, no, not for this child. The risk of it affecting her appetite was far too great, and she’s been FTT and underweight her entire life. The child has never been on medication, and she’s fine. I still don’t understand that “diagnosis”.