No jew?
Three (maybe more) of the biscuit places in the town I live in have been on top-ten lists of the best biscuits in the US. 
A few weeks back I spoke to a gentlemen in the Wegmans. He was looking sad because they were out of the ribs he wanted. He said he was serious about his ribs being from ****** and named a town two over from the one my Mother grew up in. Tiny places, both, in Southern Georgia.
Instead of saying “My Mom’s from near there” without a thought I said “Well, we might be kin!”
Was his last name ‘Jablome’ by any chance? 
No, but if you’re offering… 
That would’ve certainly put you in the minority!
When I was teaching there, there were a handful of left-of-center students, but not many. There was a College Republicans group with a large membership, but no College Democrats group. (If there’d been one, the trustees would have probably gone apoplectic.)
It always amused me that the “Bristol VA-TN, A Good Place To Live” sign just said ‘good’ rather than their having the confidence to say ‘great.’
No, I’m not going into a Woody Allen routine with you rat now. I’ll post it, instead.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DaPBhxXhprg&ab_channel=JohnTuckerJr.
I’ve heard “nervous as a cat in a room full of rockers” but not busy.
Yeah, it’s, “Busy as a one-armed paper hanger.”
“Busy as a one-legged man in an %##-kicking contest.”
“Jeet?” Or maybe “Jeat?”
With hives.(or a rash)
Slower than a fat lady in a cactus garden ,
… Barefoot…
… Blindfolded …
… Nekkid …
(You’re so dumb…)
Y’couldn’t find y’backside with a six-man search team.
You bark up that tree too?!?!? 
Sorry to bring this news to you, but it is the wrong one.
Apt!
And the two are only about 12 hours away by car.
Oh, sure, Google Maps says they’re more like 3 or so, but I have a great deal of experience with that highway. 5-6 hours is probably a reasonable average. Culturally, it’s more like several decades than several hours.
True enough. We moved here in the late 1980s - things have changed, a lot.
They’ve renamed Jeb Stuart High School and Lee High School, in the past few years. The Fairfax High School team is no longer the Rebels.
Go south and a bit west and there’s still some Confederate culture. Largest flag I’ve ever seen is a huge Confederate flag flying proudly along the state highway between Richmond and Farmville; Farmville was one of the towns that shut down its public schools a few decades back rather than let THOSE kids go to school with OUR kids.
Nah, I’d disagree. Outside of folks from California, I’ve never heard it referred to as “the I-10”. They’ll call it “I-10” or “Interstate 10” but never THE I-10.
I’ve got a hankerin fer sum BBQ.
“I’d like ta innerduce you! This here is ma wife, ma half-seester, ma cuzzzzzin, and my aint!”
“Where is your grammar?”
“Uh, hangin’ bloomers on the clothesline.”