Well, I’ve decided to attend the “We’ve peaked but kidding ourselves” party formally known as my 10 year High School Reunion. I don’t keep in contact with most of the people I graduated with; I was more of a person you recognized by sight than by name. I can’t wait to see the looks on some faces when they find out that I do comedy for a living. Just the fact that I’m getting paid to be the same asshole I always was. I figure it like this, though: Most of the people I went to school with have peaked by now. All the jocks, cheerleaders, etc. Ronnie Hensley, the “cool” guy-now a car salesman. Delicious irony in that, to me at least. I think I’m just hitting my prime, though. Not that many people would notice it. I’m still a struggling comic; I’ve only made it onto the end credits of a Showtime comedy special, not actually ON it. Most people I know tend to figure their primes by house/spouse/kids. Stacked against those standards, I fail miserably. I still live in an apartment, no spouse, no kids. But I have a cooler job. Now all I need to do is show up with a hotass girl on my arm next weekend (the 10th and 11th…two nights). Any volunteers, or else I’ll have to hit on the girl Megan I met last night (thanks, ts!)?
I vowed that the only way that I would go to my HS reunion was if one of the following 3 conditions were met:
- I won $20 million.
- I got my face on the cover of European Vogue
- I became the deposed dictator of a small Central American country.
None of those things happened so I didn’t go.
Al.
Even though I live in Minnesota, am only 17, and don’t quite qualify as a “hotass girl,” you know I’d willingly join you. For some reason, however, I don’t think my mother would approve… Go figure.
When is it? I might be available.
And is think setting you up with other women? It’s 'cause he wants to keep me to himself. Don’t let his wiley ways fool you.
I’m not sure if I qualify as the hotass either, but if it wasn’t for the fact that I’m married, I’d go with you in a sec.
Can you imagine the great story we could come up with?
I’m a talented but tortured artist who works in iron (like the lady in Cast Away) and spent the last three years in Italy on a scholarship from Chicago Institute of Art (or some such thing). Plus, I used to be a exotic dancer.
Yeah, that’s the story! 
Soooooo, you and ts were on the prowl last night, eh? Looneyville better lock up its wimmins! 
Oh, sorry, next weekend. I’m out of town, unless you’re in Australia.
Somehow I doubt it.
First of all, you ARE a hotass. I don’t chase after ugly chicks. Second, given my inclination for inventing on the fly, it would play out like that episode of Mad About You weher Paul and Jamie pretended they were CIA, pro bowlers, and everything else. And third, we weren’t so much on the prowl, but he and I tend to meet up weekly at a place here in town called Jake and Elwood’s. He has his supporting cast, and this was kind of a friend of a friend of his.
Oh, you do have a way with words! 
So what was that cast supporting? [sub]Ooooh, I slay me![/sub]
Yeah, I know. Bad joke. Sorry. Bad Bunny! Bad! I’m attending my Humor Improvement Workshop next week.
alice_in_wonderland:
So…the reason you didn’t go is because you haven’t been deposed yet?
Hey, a 17 year old girl would work well for the image. Kinda like Jerry Lee Lewis, only you and I aren’t cousins. Wherabouts in Minnesota? I was in Minneapolis for the first time about a year ago. Loved it.
Even in another guys thread, my wimmens are takin’ care of me!
SD, if you’re going to go for one of the women from last night, give Christy a call, she seemed a touch less…flakey…than Meg. Not that you shouldn’t call Megan if you have her number, you should. Really.
I went to mine with a friend and we had a great time. Basically pointing out what you so aptly phrased: “everyone else is past their peak.” It’s kinda nice when people come up and say “Wow, you look great” when ten years ago, they didn’t have the time of day for you. Yeah, man, call Megan, just for the night, the eye candy would be fun (and she’s not that flakey, I’m sure ).
Superdude, I’d be your date, but I have other plans on the 11th. Sorry. 
Have fun!
This is incredibly coincidental that you should start this thread … I am ducking my own 10-year reunion by hanging out with you on Saturday night!
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Superdude *
**
Superdude, you know better than that, don’t you?
I mean, your grammar.
You know that there are special rules when a sentence includes the phrase “Jerry Lee Lewis.” The rule equal applies to any sentence wherein the such phrases as “Roger Clinton,” “Billy Carter,” or “Jimmy Swaggart” appears.
Bearing that in mind, we rewrite:
“Kinda like Jerry Lee Lewis, only you and me ain’t cousins.”
Are we clear?
Thank you.
My high school does not have reunions. And I am soooo glad.
I’m skipping my 10-year reunion tomorrow night! YAY!!!
The only person I keep in touch with from HS is the only one I want to. I have no concerns as to what anyone else has been up to for the last 10 years.
I don’t remember meeting anyone last night…
I can’t wait for my 10-year reunion. Only 7 more years to go…
What? I loved my school, okay?!
If it was you, darlin’, it must have been a hell of a commute up here to Kentucky. What the hell. Wanna go?
Exactly - I haven’t got enough shoes yet…
My HS reunion was last weekend, and I skipped it. I was hoping to go, but when it was apparent that I couldn’t have a Beautiful Swede (aka Anniz) on my arm, it was pointless to go.
Next time, though… they’ll gasp in amazement to see how I turned out! Yeah!