Is there a term for a psychological phenomenon whereby a person — unable to deal in a mature way with their negative emotions toward a close friend’s or loved one’s undesirable behavior or attribute — copes by trying to eradicate any semblance of that behavior/attribute in their own self? More specifically what I have in mind is that this coping mechanism typically has two properties: first, it is pursued with passion and energy, providing an outlet for the negative emotion (and here the terms “displacement” and “compensation” seem relevant, though psychologists, please correct me if I am wrong). Second, it is pursued in a conspicuous manner, and sometimes even with an exaggerated and conspicuous sense of joy and satisfaction, in the hope of inspiring the friend/loved one to act likewise, even if intellectually the person knows that it is unlikely to have that effect.
Some concrete examples, since the above may have been a bit abstract:
[ul]
[li]A teenage boy is embarrassed by how puny his dad is, so he takes up weightlifting. [/li][li]A person is frustrated by how stubborn his friend is about not trying new foods, so he starts seeking out the most exotic cuisines possible and gushing about how delicious they are. As the friend’s behavior doesn’t change, the cuisines continue to get more and more exotic.[/li][li]A woman is fed up with her husband’s lack of exercise, so she takes her own exercise up a notch and perhaps eventually this culminates in her becoming an exercise addict when the husband’s behavior doesn’t change.[/li][li]A person is annoyed at the way his friend is always littering, so he starts doing volunteer work to pick up trash on the street and donating to environmental organizations.[/li][/ul]
My motive in wanting to know if there is a term for this phenomenon is that I’d be interested in any research that has been done on it. So if anyone can point me to relevant research in addition to or instead of providing a search term, that would be great too.