Ah, yes, Ohio. Lovely state, that. And now, even lovelier, thanks to the soon-to-be-passed ban on gay marriage.
Not only did they ban gay marriage. No, they’re smart cookies, and they thought of other bigoted restrictions they could make. They also barred any state agency from giving spousal rights or benefits, like health insurance, to same-sex couples. And they made it clear that they won’t honor any same-sex marriage or union created in another state.
The legislature passed the bill by a wide margin in the House, and Governor Taft plans to sign the bill next week. He was politically expedient enough to ask the House not to vote on the bill until this week, so it wouldn’t tarnish his State of the State address last week. Yet another smart cookie.
So, dear Ohio legislature, thank you very much for making my travel plans all that much easier. I know now not to spend one fucking penny in your state that might end up in your coffers to spend on more bigoted proposals. I hope you lose all interest from businesses and educated people and your economy suffers until you realize that the policies of the 19th century won’t help you in the 21st.
What qualifies as a vacation spot in Ohio anyway? The Rock’n’Roll Hall of Fame? The shores of Lake Erie? The original Etch-a-Sketch factory? (Hi **Slainte! )
Why oh, why oh, why oh
Should I move to Ohio?
Why spend my days in a land that hates gays?
Life is so nice in NY;
Wondrin’ why I’d wander
Why should I fly, where they’d want me to die?
Oh why, oh why, oh should one see Ohio?
Maybe I’d better not go
O-H-I-O
Maybe I’d better stay home . . .
“Because it is a fundamental redefinition of a term that has been well defined for a long, long time. The fundamental fact remains that only a heterosexual union is capable of producing children, without which the survival of the species is very much in doubt.”
Is he saying the gay lifestyle is so appealing that if we poor heteros were exposed to it we’d immediately flee screaming and jubilant (and likely naked and wet) into homosexuality? That allowing same-sex marriage is not only immoral, but an immediate threat to the entire species?
Man, who knew? Those homos are evil, I tell ya…pure evil.
It would be nice to think that the most egregious stupidity in Ohio is centered in the Cincinnati area, at least based on this comment:
" The fundamental fact remains that only a heterosexual union is capable of producing children, without which the survival of the species is very much in doubt."
But Cincy has no monopoly on wooden-headedness.
Silly, though, to boycott Ohio for vacations.
Alas, you will never know our purple mountain majesties (the Hocking Hills), our fruited plains (take your pick), our awe-inspiring lakes and rivers (which never catch fire anymore) and scenic road tours (I live on an official Ohio Byway).
I suppose a person could always send an email to Ohio Tourism, which seems to be the official, government funded tourist agency, and tell them why a vacation in Ohio is no longer possible. For that matter, a person could contact Cedar Point and point out that there are many other amusement parks in states with a more agreeable public policy on this issue.
I’ve wondered about this before. Apparently, heterosexuality is so terribly unpleasant that the slightest hint of societal approval for homosexual activities will cause every heterosexual to instantly abandon their orientation and dive headlong into every homosexual debauchery ever imagined by mankind.
Hell, I’m homosexual and I haven’t dived headlong into every homosexual debauchery ever imagined by mankind!
Actually, I lived in Cincinnati from 1988 to 1997, and got quite enough of Ohio then, thanks. (And it wasn’t my choice to move there. I was five at the time. It was, however, my suggestion to move.)
Actually, travel and tourism boycotts have been used in the past–not sure how effective they are, but states do love those out-of-state dollars that flow from visitors. Important, of course, to let the state know you’re not coming, and why.
I believe several associations stopped holding any conferences in certain states whose laws offended them.
I dunno. The Pretenders made Ohio sound pretty enticing:
I went back to Ohio
But my pretty countryside
Had been paved down the middle
By a government that had no pride
The farms of Ohio
Had been replaced by shopping malls
And muzak filled the air
From Seneca to Cuyahoga falls
Said, A, O, oh way to go Ohio
)
