No. He’s allowed give me his keys and not accept mine, forcing me to move his car even when he’s blocking an empty space, and leave it in the unblocked spot.
Hey, I didn’t make this stupid policy. And yes it is weird to give a stranger keys to your car.
That’s what I was asking, too. It sounds like this guy has seniority and thus has the right to always park in the unblocked space, per building policy.
So now I don’t really understand what the OP is complaining about. It’s not like he has to take this arrangement.
In line with the suggestion about tampering with his radio, I’d like to suggest the following (courtesy of Scott Adams, author of Dilbert):
Don’t leave it blaring. Simply program all the buttons to tune into the same station. Preferably, choose a station known for its muzak-like emanations. Do this every day, whether you have to move his car or not.
He will soon learn that fucking with you like this will result in a torture not previously known to man.
If this doesn’t work, put prawns (I think you guys call them shrimps) in his wheel covers. He’ll spend a lot of time wondering what stinks before he eventually realises… it’s him!
Max 
I did not make any of these suggestions and will deny doing so to the death!
Well, if I don’t want to shovel snow all winter, I do. The OP was complaining about this guy being a dick (bitching about whether I park his car nose-in or tail-in, complaining about scratches I can’t even see, leaving his car in the spot for weeks at a time, meaning I’m moving it a few hundred times back to the same place when it would be no skin off his ass to leave it in the blocked position the whole time and let me have better access to my car) WHEN I HAVE HIS KEYS.
The fact that this dickwad CAN do this to me doesn’'t mean I can’t get back at him. I mean, I HAVE HIS KEYS. Wouldn’t you think he’d try to keep on my good side instead of bitching about this petty shit?
I do, after all, have his keys.
Next time it snows, why don’t you two big boys go outside and resolve the issue with a pissing contest?
Seriously, he’s an anal dick, but the real problem is the parking situation and management policy. Why not spend your time helping the needy or something else worthwhile instead of plotting revenge that can’t help but escalate? Two wrongs don’t make a right.
You’re right, that is petty shit. Why don’t you be the bigger man and rise above it? This apparently is the price for getting something you want.
(I can understand you coming here and ranting, though. We used to have neighbours who had a two car garage, on a tight parking street, and us with no garage, and they would park in front of our house all the time. Just drove me buggy, but there was nothing I could do about it.)
OK, now imagine that you have their keys…
Yeah, and anything at all happens, and the guy’s going to the cops and blaming you. Personally, I’d shovel instead.
(And for good measure, take a good set of photos of your car as you left it, so any damage that appears as a result of his attempting to move your car is identifiable)
Blaming me and proving it are two different things.
I’m not a vengeful type, but it does strike me that he’s being exceptionally unaware of the dangers of pissing me off. If the situations were reversed, and I felt the need to tell him that I didn’t like the way he parked my car, I’d want to ask him politely, with maybe some apologies for my unusually neurotic behavior to be indulged, if it weren’t too much trouble, please and thank-you, etc, rather than writing me lists enurmating all the the things I’ve done wrong, and other hostile stuff. Hell if he’s going to accuse me of bashing his car by ricocheting off pillars routinely, what’s the point of parking his car with great care?
Similar situation where I used to live. During Spring through Fall I always seemed to need to run the lawn sprinker when ever someone was parked in front of the house. Particularly if the car was clean and polished. Pretty soon no one parked there. 
Sure, NOW you tell me. We could have run it in winter, too, which would have been extremely effective. Would have taken longer for them to move the car, what with chipping it out of the ice and all, but highly satisfying. What? We were making an ice rink in the front yard.
pseudo, why don’t you leave a note for him telling him pretty much what you told us in your last post, and see what he does with it? Maybe it has never occurred to him what an ass he’s being. Of course, his response will probably be, “Anything happens to my car, and you’re going down, asshole.” Come to think of it, it’s probably best for all concerned if you apply for a different parking buddy. I don’t see a good outcome here.
It would be dreadful if someone slipped a ping pong ball in his gastank. Some young punk for sure.
It would also be really bad if you accidentally dropped something noxious and it got lodged somewhere under his seat.
See, this makes you sound like the asshole. He should fear your terrible mightiness because you have his car keys? Shit, if you’re willing to vandalize his car, why not just scratch the paint or throw a cinderblock through the windshield? Hell, just kick down his front door and steal his television. That’ll teach him to leave you a note!
How about some revenge that doesn’t cause any monetary damage, such as stashing a cassette player under a seat, playing a loop of porn audio, with an FM transmitter attached? Then you can just leave the radio tuned to the porn station occasionally.
Bonus points for wiring it up to the car’s battery so it works indefinitely. Mounting it somewhere in the engine compartment might be best.
How about simply requesting a solo parking space? If there are none available now, ask the management for the next available one. Or you could request that they move you to a different tandem space. (You hope that the other tenants are more reasonable.)
Okay, now the fucking guy is suing me.
I get a call during dinner last night, him saying he wants to know what I’m willing to do about his bumper, which I’ve scratched up.
“I didn’t scratch your bumper–”
“If you’re going to deny it, I’ll be forced to seek other recourse.”
“You do what you gotta do.”
“I’ll be filing a civil case.”
“Whatever you gotta do, do it. Just don’t be calling me up saying I did something I didnt do.”
“You parked the car the wrong way–”
"There IS no wrong way. I can park your car front in, back in, or sideways in if I could fit it, and the only thing that compells me to park the way you like it parked is courtesy. "
“–and the scratch on the bumper matches the paint on the pillar–”
“–which ANYONE including you could have put there–”
“”–so I conclude that you have scratched the bumper–"
“Whatever.”
Since this is a private parking lot, and his bumper is covered under his insurance policy, and since he voluntarily gave me his keys and permission to park his car, as per the builidng’s regulations, is he even going to be able to file a case? I don’t know what he’s thinking of–small claims court?–but I’m going on my Matlock/Law & Order legal training, and think I’m going to have this dismissed without any evidence or testimony at all being introduced because
1)this is something to be settled by the building, not the courts
Is there any way he can successfullly have this heard by any court you can imagine? If I should open up a thread in GQ or something about this, I’ll do so, but this seems like such a dumb slamdunk to me, maybe I can have that confirmed here without the bother of opening up another thread? What say you?
He didn’t give you “permission” to park his car, he FORCED you to park his car. He has the option of taking the inside spot, then you’ll never even need his key, and won’t ever need to park his car again.
I wonder if he told his insurance company about it? From Met Life’s insurance FAQ
Basically, in my non-lawyerly opinion, this falls under his insurance policy, it is HIS problem.
So, do you still have his keys? Cause if I were suing someone over something as stupid as this, my first job would be to get my keys back. If he hasn’t asked, I would give them back anyway and park somewhere else. This guy is nothing but trouble.
And I don’t think the suit would stand up in court either. If I were the judge, my judgement would be “Don’t give someone keys to your car if you’re this big a candy-ass.”
In retrospect, wouldn’t just parking outside have been worth it?