The beeping 'biner

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

For those of you that haven’t the foggiest what a 'biner (carabiner) is, check here

We heard a beep. It came from somewhere in the apartment.

My fiance, sweetie that she is, was curious as to its origins. So she asked, “What was the beep?”

I told her it was my carabiner.

Now, she knows what a carabiner is and has climbed with me several times (we climbed the day before yesterday in fact). She totally called my shit on this. She was positive there was no way a carabiner could make such noise of its own accord. Normally, I admit, she’d be totally correct.

“It’s my carabiner,” I repeated.

Still no traction with her. She seemed to want me to produce this magical beeping biner immediately.

I said, “I know it’s near impossible for you to accept what I’m saying, but it’s true, it’s the carabiner.”

You can guess what unfolded. There’s no way she’d take what I said at face value. This simple matter escalated to an issue of core trust.

I told her that perhaps someday I’d tell her something impossible to believe, but need her to trust me nonetheless. That no matter how long the odds against my veracity, she’s the one I need in my corner. Given how much was now at stake, no way would I maintain a lie.

Then I said, “Go look in my climbing bag. You’ll find what you’re looking for; but if you’d believe me without looking, that is better. Perhaps you’d wait until tomorrow morning to allow more time to consider matters?”

She strode confidently towards my climbing bag and began unpacking. The second item she removed was my chalk bag. With the chalk bag still in hand, she continued removing items.

“Stop,” I said, “you’ve already found it. It’s in your hand.”

She inspected the chalk bag. Attached to the fabric loop at the top of the bag was a blue plastic carabiner with built in cheesy compass and digital watch; a lame perk from a drug rep dinner put to use holding my chalk bag onto my harness.

Eureka!!! The beeping biner.

Advice on how to get out of the doghouse appreciated

2

Drop it. Don’t be a jerk about it.

A beeping object is annoying, I’ve had things beep in my house and I can’t find the source and it drives me nuts. I get to the point where I just want to find it and smash it to bits. Perhaps her issue with you was not a trust one but she wanted to find the annoying beeping object to make it stop beeping and you apparently knew what it was yet were doing nothing about it but using it to twist into some “you don’t trust me” issue. It’s very frustrating when someone takes something minor like that and tries to make it a big relationship issue. At the risk of perpetuating stereotypes, it sounds like something a guy would accuse a woman of doing. A beeping object is a non-issue, if you know what it is, show it to her, turn it off and be done with it.

3

What s/he said.

4

{*} You said it. Normally, carabiners don’t beep. Therefore, she’s justified to be skeptical.

{**} You miscommunicated. Here, what she was really saying was: “I don’t see you making any motion intended to address the beeping”. At that point, YOU would have gone to the bag, fetched the 'biner, demonstrated the beeping, and said something to the effect of “Gee, I’m sorry, I never got around to showing you this cool trinket.” Minimal effort on your part, truth arrived at, everyone satisfied.

{***} (a) Let this be a lesson on turning someone’s legitimate question into a Test-Of-Faith, when the subject is trifling and can be objectively resolved with negligible effort on your part. (b) And a reminder that the phrase “Yes, dear, I was wrong, you were right” is not to be spoken out loud by anyone but the man of the house, lest the Anger of the Gods smite our People.

5

It beeped just once.

6

In my defense, I did apologize and she accepted my apology.

Isn’t anyone intrigued by the situation, though? I work in the sciences and often consider the issue of open mindedness with regard to data interpretation. Never in my career have I been in a situation where such an ostensibly correct interpretation ultimately was false, with the proof so close at hand.

7

That she is your fiancée and not your wife is telling. It wasn’t your biner that was beeping, it was the cheap-jack clock attached to your biner. There’s a difference, and girls know it. You’ll learn too.

P.S. Buy a comfy couch, at least 6’ if not 7’ long. You may need it in the near future.

8

There’s a reason you have to get approval before you experiment on human subjects.

9

Why am I imagining him doing the Rob Petrie thing and sending his future wife an inflatable raft addressed to himself as a test.

10

She probably believed you as far as it went, but she knew there was something more to it.

And intelligences are curious. She needed to know, she needed to see it.

You were depriving her of what she needed.

And she may have decided to bust up the “trust test”, which feels like game-playing actually. If you are serious about building reliance on one another, get into real (not pretend) situations where you have to work together…like mountain-climbing for instance.

On second thought, you two could do pretend situations as long as she knows they are drills, and gets it; and as long as some situations work the other way, ie you come through by trusting her.

11

If my SO old me that the beep came from his shoe, I’d call him on it. If he repeated this, I’d believe him. Then I’d go find the shoe and take a look at it. My thought process would go like this:
a) Upto this point, all shoes that I have seen don’t beep
b) I heard a beep
c) SO says it was from his shoe
Therefore, something is not standard about this shoe, and I want to see it.

To turn this into an issue of trust is absurd. It’s about curiosity.