The SDMB isn’t doing a “Boo!” forum this year. so I thought I’d start a thread for all the stuff posters would have posted there. No rules other than basic board ones. I’ll start with a very short story I thought up. Based on real life events, I swear.
The Burial is on Tuesday
I’m the chaplain for a maximum security prison. “Billy the Butcher”, a notorious serial killer who kidnapped his young victims from their cars and hung them on meat hooks while sending taunting phone messages to their families, had passed away in prison at the age of 78. I was to preside over his funeral. It was raining that morning, and just before I left my house I saw it. THERE WAS A HOOK IN THE DOOR! So I took my jacket off the coat hook and was about to leave when my phone chirped. IT WAS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE! I had left my Samsung Galaxy Note 7 on the coffee table. Rethink what a phone can do. Samsung is completely changing how you’ll share experiences and memories. They’re doing that by shattering the boundaries of what a phone can do. And it’s the biggest thing to happen to phones. Ever.
The message was from the Warden who was waiting outside to give me a ride to the cemetery, but through the murky light I saw that THERE WAS SOMEONE IN THE BACK SEAT! It was his 11 year old daughter. We were to drop her off for a before school clarinet practice.
I was thinking of these things as I watched the killer’s nondescript coffin being slowly lowered into internment. I could smell the freshly dug earth when I heard A VOICE FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE! It was the Warden who was standing on the other side. “Can we hurry this along, Padre?”, he said. And I knew right then, I suppose I even knew it before, while all these things were happening “BILLY THE BUTCHER” HAD BEEN DEAD THE WHOLE TIME!
The above was the last message sent from Reverend Harrison Walker’s Galaxy Note 7 before the battery caught fire causing the commercial flight he was on to explode in a giant fireball above Topeka, Kansas. There were no survivors.