Living with crazy old people is challenging at times but it’s also baffling. Today I went with my mother in law (89 years old, probably early alzheimers) to the grocery store. On her list was makeup. Specifically Maybelline number 105 Cinnamon Spice blusher.
Problem is that I’ve bought this for her at least 3 times in the past two months. The most recent time I purchased it for her was about 2 weeks ago. When she shows me the used compact it’s the same one that we’ve “replaced” three times. She puts the new one in a safe place until the old one is truly used up and then doesn’t remember either buying it or squirreling it away. :smack:
Unfortunately for her, two drug stores and the grocery store are out of Maybelline #105 Cinnamon Spice blusher. I’ve just searched her bedroom and the bathroom and can’t figure out where she might have hidden these items. I’m sure that when we find the hiding place there’ll be at least three other #105s in there, still in the package, waiting to be used.
WTF did she do with it? I just can’t figure out where she might have hidden it/put it away for safe keeping. Oh, hell, maybe she’s throwing away the new one thinking she’s discarding the old one?
A couple days ago I pointed out to ma that she currently has 15 containers of macaroni and spaghetti. She also has 3 boxes of pancake mix. Remember to not buy these again until put on the shopping list. I also made the mistake of saying I threw out a box of crackers that was 2 and 1/2 years past it’s use by date which had been under the macaroni. Always throw it out on trash day and never mention doing it.
I would switch that makeup in the purse and not mention it.
Check in her dress shoes or her rarely-used “pretty” underwear/stockings drawer. That’s where my late grandma used to hide things (not Alzheimers, but short-term memory problems due to long-term alcohol abuse).
Good luck. Sweetie’s mom had a stroke 15 years ago and now has Alzheimer’s to boot. While she was still mobile, she’d hide valuable things because she was afraid people would steal them, and then didn’t remember she’d hidden them, let alone where she’d hidden them. We recently found a keepsake book of handwritten poems that his dad had thought was lost (assumed to be left at the home of an old friend now deceased) for for 10 years. It was in the back of her closet, tucked inside the slipcase of a Russian art encyclopedia. Nobody was likely to touch THAT.
I finally found Maybelline #105 at Walgreens and purchased 2. I made her show me where she was putting them. Stay tuned, I’ll let you know in a couple of weeks if she “runs out” again.
Yes, for a while she was buying napkins and trash bags every week at the grocery store until we had enough napkins and trash bags to last the year. Now that she no longer drives and I take her to the store I can remind her what we’re not out of.
And to answer a question…no, not a nursing home or assisted living. The in laws live at home and we live with them in their attic apartment. A move we made a year ago in order to help them out. Mostly it’s going well but some times there are these weird things that happen.
Like the time we “lost” 5 bananas. Turns out that an old man who likes bananas and can’t remember that he’s just eaten a banana might eat 5 bananas in the course of 24 hours. But it was strange, we purchased them. Put them in the fruit bowl and the next night at dinner they were gone and we had the endless “where are the bananas” discussion. Endless because with old people the conversation frequently goes in circles with the same question being asked over and over with the same answer being given each time.
My Nana lives in a little two-room apartment in a retirement home. She’s convinced the people who come in to clean are stealing her kleenex. My mother has discovered that she actually puts it away in the closet (because people are ‘stealing’ it, so it should be hidden), and then forgets that it’s there.
Okay, I’m sorry, but this is funny. At least the bananas went to a good place, as opposed to having accidentally fallen out of the grocery cart on the way to the car. This could also be my dad someday. Whenever my parents come to visit they have to bring their own stash of bananas.
When my grandmother was in a nursing home, she always needed pencils. And she wasn’t a crossword puzzle or Hangman enthusiast – she only used the writing instruments to mark her entree choices when the menus for the coming week’s meals were sent around. Sure enough, when she finally died and the room was being cleaned, the nurses’ aides found dozens of pencils that had slipped between the bed and the wall, fallen behind her dresser, landed on the closet floor, etc.
I almost mentioned this yesterday. When I was working hospital nursing, if a little old lady lost her glasses, her makeup, her pen, anything, it was ALWAYS in the tissue box.
Reminds me of my father, who had Alzheimer’s. Every night at bedtime he would count his gloves and handkerchiefs. Then, whenever my mother was going out shopping, he would insist that she buy new gloves and handkerchiefs for him. Very sad.
Oh! My mother did that exact thing with bananas. Every time I’d bring her a bunch, she’d say, “Oh, my, I haven’t had a banana in ages!” and eat one.
And five minutes later she’d notice the bananas and say, “Oh, my, I haven’t had a banana in ages!” and eat one.
One time she ate four in a half hour, and flat out accused me of lying when I showed her the pile of empty skins when she was heading for number five.
I learned to only bring her a couple at a time, and I’d separate them into onsies and stash them around the place – one on the kitchen counter, one on her bedside table, one beside ‘her’ chair, and so forth to slow her down.
Yes, it is. My mother’s body is still functional, but most of what made her my mother is really gone. She still has most of her social skills…but she has a short term memory of about 2 minutes, during most of the day. It’s somewhat longer in the morning, but only somewhat. My father is extremely resistant to having her put in an assisted living situation…and he could use some assistance himself. He has to have dialysis three times a week, and it’s just not safe for her to be left alone for the hours that it takes.
For the bannana eaters, don’t they notice that they’re full, or at least not hungry anymore? If not, is there a real danger of them overeating? Not danger of getting fat, but actually eating to the point of injury?
A buddy of fine worked at a long-term care facility while he was finishing his university degree. One day all the staff rejoiced when he discovered almost two dozen sets of missing dentures in little old lady’s drawer when he was helping her get ready for an outing with her family.
It seems when she would visit other residents, she would “find her teeth” and take them back to her room to keep them safe. She knew something was amiss when she had multiple sets, but wasn’t sure what to do about it. After the major tooth cachet discovery, when someone’s teeth went missing, they’d just go and ask her.
“I have too many teeth!” became my buddy’s catchphrase for a bit.
Bananas are loaded with potassium, vitamin B6 and vitamin C, as well as sugar. If you’re reasonably healthy, it’s no big deal. However, many elderly people have renal problems, which tends to lead to excess potassium because the kidneys can’t excrete excess potassium. Bananas alone may not be that big a deal, but if the person also uses a salt substitute (which is generally potassium chloride) or is on potassium for some other reason, it can be a big deal. The sugar may also wreak havoc on diabetes, depending on how well the disease is controlled. One isn’t going to kill you, but four or five in a short time may.
“Fullness” is often a matter of perception. If I know I’ve eaten, I feel full. On the other hand, I’ve eaten when I’ve been hugely distracted and didn’t feel full because it didn’t register that I had eaten. (This usually happens when I’m eating in a social situation, and the food involved tends to be hors d’ouevres or some other snack. I don’t think I’ve ever been so oblivious as to not notice that I’ve eaten a full meal.) People with dementia literally do not remember that they’ve eaten. Some also have a diminished appetite, so it may not register that they’re hungry/not hungry.
This could also be my dad someday. Whenever my parents come to visit they have to bring their own stash of bananas.